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I think my mom has been healing on the other side (Read 4925 times)
Vicky
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I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Apr 7th, 2021 at 6:33pm
 
Lately I’ve noticed myself spontaneously remembering the feeling of some little things about my mom, and it’s been making me think that maybe it’s because she’s finally done some healing.  This has only been in the last few weeks.  Up until now I didn’t want to think of her at all, talk about her, or even look at photos of her.  So the fact that these feelings/memories are popping up spontaneously makes me think I’m getting signs that she’s indeed healing and possibly communicating in some way, and that I’m receiving it because it’s positive in nature and doesn't feel painful.

She passed away in January 2018 and has visited me several times in different ways but I never enjoyed it because our relationship was so conflicting and difficult my entire life.  She had personality disorders so was extremely difficult to deal with, and she could be very mean and hateful.  I lived with her for her last three years before she died.  All her visits after her death were still very toxic to me, and though I displayed PUL to her I also didn’t want her visiting me and tried to tell her to please back off, give me more time to do my own healing!

I think the last time she visited, or one of the last times was when she was very upset with me and wouldn’t even acknowledge my presence, but my dad (who passed in 2010) was with her, listening, comforting, and kind of just counseling her, just being there for her.  He distinctly made me aware of his presence and he was kind of being a shield between us and just beaming PUL.  I interpret his actions as showing me he’s helping her through a lot of healing that she needs to do, and he wanted me to know that that’s taking place. 

So some of the things I’ve been thinking, feeling, and remember lately are spontaneous things, like the other day I was craving one of Mom’s favorite meals she liked to make.  It’s not something I especially like or crave, so remembering it as if craving it definitely seemed like a sign from her.  And I’ve just been spontaneously remembering nice moments between us we had, a kindness she extended here or there, certain memories, times we laughed, and positive attributes about her.  All positive things, as if she’s wanting me to remember her in a good way.  That’s literally never happened before in the three years she’s been dead.

I’ve always wondered why we both decided to have such a negative and difficult relationship in this life.  Must be some kind of karma we had to work out, and so I wonder if it’s been worked out??  I would love to have another experience with her visiting or some kind of experience that would be a confirmation of her healing and how far she’s come. 
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #1 - Apr 9th, 2021 at 11:51am
 
Hello Vicky:

It is good to hear that you have received some positive signs about your Mom. Perhaps you need to focus on what your Dad communicated to you.

Remember, your sense of time and your Mom's sense of time are different, so three years might not mean the same thing to your Mom as it meant to you.

I believe we come to this world mainly to learn, and challenges help us do so.  Perhaps the difficulty you experienced with your Mom helped your Soul grow some. Perhaps some reflection will lead to further growth.

My Mom passed away during February of 2020. My guidance created some dreams for me where it seemed as if she was still alive, and I found this troubling. The point of these dreams?

I was my Mom's caretaker for the last few years of her life.  She had dementia, would become disoriented, and became quite dependent on me. It seemed as if she would use me to be oriented. She was difficult to deal with at times. Let me just say that I had to pick up after her at times. It didn't seem as if I had a life of my own.

So when she passed away, a part of myself felt some relief. Of course this lead to some guilt. What helped me overcome this guilt is the understanding that I don't regret being her caretaker for a few years. I am very grateful that the financial circumstances of my life worked out so I could be there for her. (I was able to retire at the age of 58)

Another thing that helped is the fact that I would've been willing to look after her for a number of additional years if that requirement existed.

Another factor, the quality of her life had gone down not only because of her dementia, but because of chronic pain, insomnia and other physical problems she had. She used to frequently say, "I am ready to join your Dad."

Sorry to go on about me so much, perhaps you'll find it helpful in some way.
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Vicky
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #2 - Apr 9th, 2021 at 12:31pm
 
Hey thanks Albert.  Yeah I definitely know there’s a time difference.  So I think the three years to me is a much shorter time to her. 

What I think/felt my dad was communicating to me was definitely PUL for both me and my mom.  And I think he was letting me know he’s there for her, helping her, and that I don’t need to wonder or worry about that.  Just knowing that made me know it’ll be taken care of. 

Everything you described of taking care of your mom with her dementia was exactly what I went through.  I hated it but I also appreciated it.  I agree it was a soul growth thing.  I know that Mom now knows and appreciates what I did for her. 

I think I’ve mentioned it in other posts, but I moved in with my mom when I was diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer.  Then my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer, and then she got dementia.  So it was very difficult to deal with all that, but I always did the best I could for mom and with love.  The last time she was consciously awake she told me to leave and that she never wanted to see me again and that she didn’t love me, but I still went to visit her (she was dying in a hospice center).  And within a couple days she was completely unconsciously aware and couldn’t eat, talk, or communicate in any way, and was agitated and couldn’t sleep.  So I did Reiki on her and she immediately settled down and went to sleep.  She then slept for two days and then died in her sleep.  I really appreciate that I got to do that for her. 

I do find it helpful what you share.  I love that you talk about your mom and what you did for her.  That’s great that you got to retire early.  I’m 50 and sure I’ll have to work as long as I can.  Unless we win the Lottery, which would be awesome. 

You know what I wanted to tell you?  Leading up to mom’s death, when she was still awake and aware, she also talked about going to be with my dad.  And I reminded her that dad died on the 10th of January and that that anniversary was coming up.  Mom died on January 10th. 

And then you know what?  Afterwards I realized I was wrong.  Dad actually died on the 18th.  I’m kind of laughing to myself about that now.  I didn’t mean to mislead Mom at all…I was just mistaken and didn’t realize it.  But it seems like I put that idea in her head and she chose to die on the 10th, like maybe that was a way for her to be with him??  I don’t know, I just thought it was quite a coincidence. 

All the times mom has come to visit me have been very vivid dreams where I become lucid and aware that I’m dreaming and she is visiting me.  Some visits were OBEs. 

I love that we can have these experiences.  It makes everything, all the hard stuff, tolerable, because we know we live on after this life. 
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #3 - Apr 9th, 2021 at 2:26pm
 
Vicky:

Yes, it is definitely helpful to know that the afterlife exits.

Regarding the date thing you spoke of, my Mom used to always say, "when it's your time, it's your time."

I have a friend who had a Dad who wasn't spiritually minded, but he (my friend's Dad) always felt that he would die when he was 89, and he did so. Died of heart attack. Up to that point he was able to take care of himself including driving himself around.
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Vicky
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #4 - Apr 9th, 2021 at 2:31pm
 
Recoverer 2 wrote on Apr 9th, 2021 at 2:26pm:
Vicky:

Yes, it is definitely helpful to know that the afterlife exits.

Regarding the date thing you spoke of, my Mom used to always say, "when it's your time, it's your time."

I have a friend who had a Dad who wasn't spiritually minded, but he (my friend's Dad) always felt that he would die when he was 89, and he did so. Died of heart attack. Up to that point he was able to take care of himself including driving himself around.


Wow, weird.  I've heard of people knowing at what age they were going to die.  I am glad I don't know!!
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #5 - Apr 9th, 2021 at 4:20pm
 
Yeah, I don't want to know.
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #6 - Apr 10th, 2021 at 10:34am
 
I'd like to know but only a few days ahead. That way I could say my goodbyes, put my affairs in order, and most importantly teach my wife how to use all the remotes.
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #7 - Apr 10th, 2021 at 11:14am
 
Good idea, except, I don't want to have to teach anybody to use remotes during my last few days.  Angry Embarrassed Grin


rondele wrote on Apr 10th, 2021 at 10:34am:
I'd like to know but only a few days ahead. That way I could say my goodbyes, put my affairs in order, and most importantly teach my wife how to use all the remotes.

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Vicky
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #8 - Apr 11th, 2021 at 12:14am
 
rondele wrote on Apr 10th, 2021 at 10:34am:
I'd like to know but only a few days ahead. That way I could say my goodbyes, put my affairs in order, and most importantly teach my wife how to use all the remotes.


Thoughtful man you are.  I still don't know how to use them all or which is which.  Why in the world we need four of them is beyond me, LOL.
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #9 - Apr 11th, 2021 at 12:26pm
 
I need to use only one remote. Such fortune is probably the result of my fantabulous Karma.

What did you two do in a past life that makes it so you have to use more than one remote?  Sad
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Vicky
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #10 - Apr 11th, 2021 at 9:40pm
 
Recoverer 2 wrote on Apr 11th, 2021 at 12:26pm:
I need to use only one remote. Such fortune is probably the result of my fantabulous Karma.

What did you two do in a past life that makes it so you have to use more than one remote?  Sad


Literally tonight I had to call my 25-year-old son at work to ask him how to watch Hulu.  He recently bought something called a FireStick.  It’s a streaming device that has Alexa.  I’m still not even sure what streaming is compared to cable??  Anyway, so we have a remote for that.  We have the TV remote.  We have the cable remote.  And we have a remote for our soundbar. 

It’s kind of ridiculous because I can never remember what goes with what. 

Oh, and then there’s the PlayStation.  So if we have the Firestick streaming thing plugged in we can’t have the PlayStation plugged in at the same time.  The PlayStation uses a joystick controller.  So tonight he had the PlayStation plugged in, therefore I had to find Hulu using the joystick. 

My kids kind of make fun of me, but they don’t seem to realize that I didn’t grow up with all this kind of stuff.  We didn’t even have a remote for half my childhood.   

And what’s funny is, we don’t call them remotes, we call them boxes.  I had to think back why that was.  When I was a kid and we got our first TV remote my dad didn’t know what to call it.  He said, “Hand me that box,” and it just stuck. 

So we have four boxes and a joystick  Roll Eyes
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Re: I think my mom has been healing on the other side
Reply #11 - Apr 12th, 2021 at 11:12am
 
When I was a kid we wouldn't argue over who is going to control the remote, we would argue on who would get up to change the channel manually. There were only about 6 channels back then. No, the Kardashians weren't on the air back then. We were really deprived. I tell you, it was like the pioneer days. We really roughed it.  Wink
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