I like the way y'all are talking about sex!  we may reach some conclusions.
We come here to experience life in a body. We are inundated by the media, television, movies, etc that sex makes the world go around and if you are not having it twice a week, something is wrong.

so we have all sorts of expectations around it, as well as guilt trips from religious sources. I would say only we evolve ourselves by accepting sex can be here or there a celebration of one another. A celebration of Love.

If it's done for any other intention, such as to achieve bodily orgasm only, or personal gratification where love is not involved for the other, then I would say that is not the ultimate union of spiritualized sex, but an experiment in sexual union of two bodies trying to meet at the climax point. there are books out for that if you want to be an expert in orgasm reaching. We came here for sensation, don't guilt  trip yourself  while in a body, moderation in all things is good to bear in mind, while traversing through a world of sex, money, personal acclaim basically.

In that sense, as Vicki implies, you are making love all the live long day and making love with your partner is just an extension of your mind to them. here or there.

Holding hands is the best! Holding hands in the spirit realm  was like jumping to the afterglow without using the physical body, or any of it's parts. I remember a particular incident. I had thought of this one person for many years. started having obes concerned with him. Most of them were not sexually related. Somewhere along the line I lost interest in having sex. I look for companionship these days, of others into my field of interests.
I don't feel I'm missing anything. I feel like a man/woman inside, polarized that way. the most prominent emotion I have is a gratitude to every soul I meet.
back to the hand holding incident was a special treat!

I had decided to stop thinking about this person and it was time to make new decisions. When it's time to make new decisions, about where your life is going for instance, is that time where extraordinary obes or experiences can occur.
That same night the hand holding happened. I was in the obe lounging on my bed, propped up against the pillows. I was dressed. Suddenly he was there, not a word was spoken. we have never met in person, but I know his face. He was there in his body, yet a younger version of himself. He sat there just emanating adoration at me.

Every woman should feel this. It was semi dark, I needed to find his hand. I groped and pounded the bed in the darkness reaching for his hand. I was anxious to find his hand. looking down at the bed, he was perched on the edge of it, he saw my hand and clasped it tightly.
As this occurred a surge of love raced up my arm and into every part of my body. our two hands fused into one hand. I could not define fingers..it seemed like our two hands were just two arms and now one arm. I knew I was receiving a charge up in a sense, due to my decision to find a new direction in life and leave this one out of my thoughts.

The charge up of love, continued for a long time. infusion of love. just gazing at each other. The same as the afterglow of sex here, only quite more intensified within spirit, and carries over the next days and weeks to produce euphoria within C1.

I had to ask him a question. I wanted to know if I was only dreaming. I had not crossed the bridge yet, where obes become so real that there is no doubts anymore. I scooted up to him closer but somehow I must have been expressing my enthusiasm, in this realization that this was really happening. My enthusiasm made myself levitate off the bed a bit, in a hopping motion (lol) I floated back down to eye level with him and his mouth flew open in wonder and surprise. I wondered why. maybe I had sprayed some colors on the atmosphere?
Maybe he thought he was looking at an angel? We were still holding hands fused as one. no, it was just alysia overdoing it again.

as I gazed 2 inches from his face I asked "do you astral travel?"

somehow I had thought he didn't astral travel, so how could he be really here? He frowned at me when I asked that question, and I thought I had displeased him. He turned his face away for a moment to talk with his guides. His guides explained to him about astral travel, I assume, as I could not discern the conversation he was having with them. We continued holding hands throughout.

I waited patiently for his answer. I could see him nodding his head in affirmation of agreement with his guides. He started to turn back to me, then they told him something else and he listened quietly, nodded his head again and brought his face close to mine and whispered intently YES!
I assumed much later that his guides informed him that I studied astral travel and often asked myself if this was real or merely something I had created all by myself, and this was the way I ascertained my personal reality.
then it was I lay back to my pillows relieved that this was real and completely happy and still getting charged up and still holding hands as if the hands were one thing.
the feel of the hand holding, I might mention was very solid and real.
Towards the end of the obe, I began chattering happily to him about my new car, just making small talk. later, he lay on my bed just watching me, still with love on his face, my daughter came into the room and did not see him. I said he's here, touch him. She touched him and drew her hand back in surprise, only I could see him, but she knew he was there as she felt him.
I got up to make my move to another town and he followed me within a symbolic visual language as the obe was now supplying symbology to me of the future unraveling.

He had the funniest look on his face. I have to put this pic up to show you guys the feelings that were there; the expression of feeling on his face was the little guy on the right. I'm the one with the curled toes.

I have a lady friend who is quite spiritual, and recently we got very physical with each other without getting sexual. We started out by doing a meditation where we tried to share love with each other as much as possible. Next we got physical, but it was "mostly" about showing affection and sharing love with each other. At one point I made the comment that if we had sex with each other, we'd probably want to eat food immediately afterwards (another physical desire) and she said: "Or have a smoke." Because we didn't have sex we were able to lay with each other for hours experiencing love and peace, rather than the short lived experience of sexual pleasure.

One thing that helps me and my lady friend connect, is that we completely respect each other, and are able to be completely honest with each other without worrying that one is judging the other.  Neither of us feels like we need to push our ideas on each other (This might be hard to believe, considering how I am on this forum at times ). What also helps is sharing love without being needy. It is more about giving, while trusting that love is always available even if we didn't know each other.

We wanted to share affection with each other not because we were trying to obtain love, but because we were already feeling love and wanted to express it. We also wanted to become "one" as much as possible.  

I figure spirit beings also find ways to share love with each other. They'll twinkle their light at each other, send a loving thought, or a stream of love. When both spirits send a signal, it is understood that merger can take place. Because humans make use of a body, sometimes they use their bodies to show love and affection towards each other.

 

Thank you Justin. Regarding your question, I don't know if this answers your question, but when I was with my lady friend, I figure we shared an energy field. I don't believe this sharing can be known intellectually. It is something you feel. We touched each other in various ways in order to let each other know that we are there for each other.  If we became more aware of how we were sharing our awareness and energy together, there probably would've been less of a need for physical expression. The need for physical expression might've gotten in the way a bit.

I must add that my lady friend is more open to feeling other people's energy than I am. She's really empathic. During one of our first get togethers we meditated a bit, and she asked if she could tune into my energy. I said yes, she checked it out, and her description of my energy matched how it was moving within me.

There were a few occasions when our sexual energy became more active, but we were able to stop this by focussing on love and/or stopping an activity that seemed more sexual than other activities.

Quote:

Justin:

There are women at my work that showed interest towards me but I didn't try to establish a relationship with them because I felt as if they would want the kind of sexual relationship people tend to have. My lady friend and I started out as spiritual friends. Early on I found a way to let it be known that I'm not looking for the kind of sexual relationship people usually look for. My lady friend understands why I have chosen such a way. In fact, she told me that she is glad that we didn't rush into sex as people often do.

Perhaps in some cases it is a matter of how a relationship progresses. If two people jump into the sex part before establishing a relationship that is based upon unconditional love, the basis for their relationship might not be that deep. It could be difficult to undo things. Do you figure you received the message you received because sexual contact is something you should avoid completely, or because you rushed into having sex with your lady friend before you had a chance to establish a deeper connection?

There is also the matter of what your lady friend wants to progress to. If your lady friend doesn't want to progres in the same way you want to progress, perhaps there is a missmatch.  If this is the case, perhaps it was a mistake to get involved sexually. You might end up with Becky number 2.

When it comes to my lady friend, it seems quite clear that she wants to progress in the same direction I want to progress.  There are things I can help her with, and there are things she can help me with. Yesterday I thought quite a bit about the sex/love thing. I meditated for a little while in order to receive verification for some of my conclusions. My guidance showed me an image of my lady friend sitting in the same chair I was sitting in, with her arms wrapped across her chest just like my arms were wrapped across my chest. She said: "That's what I've been telling you." I responsed to this message with confusion, was shown another image of my lady friend, she looked at me in a frustrated way, and got up out of her (my) chair and walked away.

Is affection a part of love? What's the best way too express it? Are there occasions when a couple finds the middle ground? On the other hand, we shouldn't consider a partner to be a charity case.

Justin:

Going by your last post, you and Becky still have more of a connection than some of your recent posts (not just on this thread) indicate.

Alysia:

Her arms were wrapped in the same way my arms were wrapped. It wasn't a really formal meditation. I just took a moment and closed my eyes so I could receive a visual image. My lady friend had a dream where we were walking in a school hallway together.  I figure this is a symbol for learning together.  When it comes to sharing love, it seems as if each of us has something to teach the other.

The key is, what role does affection play in love? When I was involved with guru based teachings the need for affection was thought of as a needy thing. "You have to be transcendent!"  I've been chipping away at this idea. I figure we all want love. Nothing wrong with that.  Perhaps the key is to find a way where we can have love completely, rather than trying to grow beyond it.

I hear you Justin.

That said, before I read your post, I had some more thoughts. Nothing new, but worth saying. Different chakras represent diffferent energy levels. The upper chakras represent higher states of being, while the lower chakras tend to represent lower states of being. Sex is a lower chakra energy. I believe that our chakras connect us to different energy levels. If we get too focused on a lower chakra, we get overly connected to that energy level.

There are a lot of people in this World that have sex without love being a factor. The same is true with animals. Male animals fight each other over the right of owning all of the females sexually. Sometimes men do the same, as seen with some religious cults. There might even be some spirits on this level. If you're over focused on sex, this is the energy level you'll connect to. If you want to be focused at higher levels, you'll need to be willing to let go of lower levels. Justifications and rationalizations won't enable your energy to ascend.

When I say "you," I don't mean you specifically. Just a way of speaking.