Vicky
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Another thread was talking about being multidimensional beings, and that is sort of what I want to talk about here but more to the point of split consciousness or split awareness and noticing when this is happening. I call it a split since I don't know how else to describe it.
I have had several instances where I have felt the split take place (during OBEs or meditation) and wanted to hear from others who have experienced this too.
Once it happened while listening to Bruce's retrieval exercise CD. I wasn't expecting that to happen so when it did I was very surprised! What happened was, I was feeling very relaxed while listening to the exercise, to the point where I wasn't sure if my fading in and out was me sleeping or just "clicking out". I wouldn't have memory of having dreamed but would just find myself coming back and hearing Bruce's voice on the CD. I wanted to be deeply relaxed but I didn't want to fall asleep. I desired to be able to pay attention to the CD but to also remember any experience that might be occurring.
Upon one of these "coming back" points the next thing I remember was floating into a doctor's office. I noticed that I didn't come in through the door because I could see the door in front of me to my left. A desk was to my right. I could see quite a bit of the room in good detail, although the entire time I did not move from my position. I just kept looking straight ahead, kind of confused as to how I got there.
A nurse was quickly walking in the door as I was floating in from the opposite side of the room. She was dressed in an old-fashioned nurse's outfit. In fact, the whole room seemed outdated. Although she seemed in a hurry, her demeanor was not that of being in a hurry. It was as if she knew there wasn't much time to spend with me and she wanted to make the most of it. She was kind and gentle, and her touch was soothing.
So as I floated in, I see her come in and she is obviously expecting me. She didn't ask me to sit, she just held out her hands for me to come closer to her as she said, "C'mon, let's get started". I thought to myself, "Huh, I had a physical therapy appointment today? I haven't even called and scheduled it yet. Weird. I'm supposed to be doing a BST retrieval right now. Oh well, since I'm here I might as well keep my appointment".
Then I felt the split which actually felt like it was a physical sensation. It was not painful, but it felt like I was dividing into two equal parts, and each part was completely aware of itself and of the other. One of me knew that I was lying in bed patiently listening to the CD, and the other of me kept focused on the doctor appointment.
So was I doing a sort of retrieval of myself? I am not sure at all why I had this experience or what it really means. (I recently had surgery for carpal tunnel syndrome on my right hand, and need it done on my left. I have had to do everything with my left hand the last several weeks which is making my left hand symptoms much worse).
At this "appointment" the nurse stood right in front of me and held my hands in each of hers. Then she let go of my left hand and used her right hand to lightly rub and massage my right hand. She seemed genuinely caring and concerned. It felt good on my hands. She had a gentle touch. Then she held both my hands again and rubbed each with her thumbs, and she looked as if she was kind of assessing their condition. (I actually felt guilty for enjoying this because I knew I was "neglecting" to do the CD exercise).
She looked at my left hand in hers and said, "This is worse". I didn't know if she meant it was worse than my right hand or just worse than it was before. I thought, "Doesn't she know that I just had surgery on my right hand? That is the hand that needs work right now". (At the time I was due to go to my first physical therapy appointment but had not even called to make the appointment yet).
Then she gently shook my left hand in hers and said, "Relax". I felt relaxed already but tried to relax and not be tensing up. Still looking at my left hand she said, "Relax. You really need to relax more". She was not being strict, but was rather gentle. I did, however, feel the insistence in her voice. All this time I had been looking right at her, but at this insistence to relax I turned my gaze and looked directly at my left hand still in hers. I concentrated on relaxing it more but my dual reality made me say to myself, "I am supposed to be doing a BST retrieval, not be at a hand appointment for myself!" at which point I quickly completely woke up.
The experience with the nurse could actually be just a dream, just a way of my subconscious mind telling me to take it easy with my left hand since it had been doing extra duty lately.
But the sensation of the split awareness was fascinating, to say the least.
Vicky
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