Hello all, I'm new here. 

I just did my 2nd retrieval, which is a belief systems territory retrieval using Bruce's "After Knowledge Guidebook" and CDs.

I am a computer software kind of person, but I'm also open to this kind of stuff. I have been for years. I find it all very fascinating and quite believable.

Anyhow, my struggle is that I really think that these retrievals are all concocted by my imagination! In this retrieval, I saw my guide. He was a very ordinary, balding, kind of nerdy middle aged man. He took me to where I finally got the impression of a young man sitting and watching something. Then it became a huge church with a fire and brimstone Fundamentalist Christian preacher up behind a podium.

My guide persuaded me to talk this other guy to getting up and going to the side somewhere. I don't know why it wasn't a big deal to the other parishioners or the other people (who were just foggy images of nothing), but I was able to talk Mark Blaggett or Bloggett from Joplin, Missouri, to come to the side because "I really needed his help." 

When I asked for proof of his existence, he pulled a picture of his daughter (he's 32) out of his wallet. Dark hair/red outfit..probably 4 years old. I  really couldn't get her name though. The problem with all this for me is that it's all very very fuzzy and vague and images keep changing and nothing stays in focus.

I was able to then send love energy and that is when my guide stepped in and spoke with Mark about his family. I think that snapped Mark out of it, so to speak. He was really full of fear about religion and felt like if he didn't leave there, his soul would go straight to Hell. My guide convinced him to go with him to see "family" that missed him and that church would still be here. We went, and ended up at a beautiful midwestern town scene in Focus 27. Then his maternal grandparents arrived...or maybe they were just older deceased relatives. It wasn't clear...

My thing is that I think this was in my mind because of all the things I've read in Bruce's material and other material about religious people getting stuck there. I get the sense that my imagination concocted this whole story out of bits of info stored in my brain, and my mind WANTED this retrieval to be successful (and it was). It just went too smoothly.

I can see how my issues are around this. I am very frustrated with the relgious "right" and have been for some time. So maybe this was my own way of addressing that?

Have others in here gotten past the point of wondering whether they are just imagining things?
Thank you for reading this,
Steve

Hi Steve,

I shared this story on this site about 3 years ago.  Janet was a warm and beautiful young social worker with long silky black hair (a competitor in the Miss Silky Hair USA contest).   I was smitten and dated her for 2 years while I was a young grad student n Boston.  I truly cared about her, but could never get over her vulnerability to clinical depression.  I was under a lot of pressure and needed a woman who was more upbeat.  The more I tried to make the relationship work, the more trapped I felt.  In retrospect, I realize I was too busy with my doctoral studies to properly nurture a serious romance.  I gradually baled out of the relationship.  During this process, she started admitting to me that she was suicidal.  I somehow knew she meant it, but you can't marry someone just to keep them alive.  It was my first serious romance and I handled the end badly. Sometimes you grow up at other people's expense.

She moved from Boston to Washington and started dating again, but met a lot of well-to-do guys who were just out for a one-night stand.  Already depressed, she bought a gun and shot herself.   

I was devastated.  Her suicide coincided with the easing of my academic pressure and I now realized how much I loved her despite our areas of incompatibility.  I had just read Robert Monroe and desperately wanted to retrieve her.

One night, I entered a dream state of unusually intense vividness and found myself in a dark void.  I ascended through the void until I encountered a small hovering booth.  Inside a smart-looking woman was sitting at a desk.  At the back of the booth was a green curtain.  I thought, "This is my big chance to retrieve Janet."   I told the woman at the desk that I must see Janet.  She replied, "Well, I don't think she's ready to see you."  That gave me pause.  But then I was overwhelmed with revulsion at the thought that Janet was languishing in mental torment because of her continuing depression and because of the pain her suicide caused her family and friends.   I surprised myself by mentally yelling, "BUT I MUST SEE HER NOW!"   Instantly, I experienced one of the most powerful emotional bursts of energy I have ever experienced.  I can best describe it as a potent combination of love, intense rage at Janet's sorry plight, and an odd feeling of omnipotence, as if, just then, my word was law in the universe. 

The woman at the desk immediately disappeared and a strong astral wind caused the green curtain to flutter wildly.  In a second or so, Janet materialized before me--only not the mature young woman I knew.  Rather, her appearance was that of a young teenager.   Oh the love I felt for her in that tender moment!  We passionately embraced and she repeated over and over again, "I'm OK, sweety; I'm OK, I'm OK."  Through this experience, I felt a bond that I knew would never be broken.  I woke up exhilarated and relieved that she was making progress in the beyond. 

But as a few days passed, my certainty faded more and more until I was soon convinced and now know that this experience was just an unusally vivid lucid dream fueled by wishful thinking.    

Steve, I share this experience with you because I sense that your skepticism is well-founded.  On the other hand, you have a commendable and unusual hunger to know and verify your retrievals as real.  So I encourage you to keep your verification standards high and keep on trying. 

Actually, the possibility of retrievals first entered into human LITERARY consciousness in the early church, but this notion was quickly suppressed.  I am impressed by none of the so-called verifications of the retrievals archived by Bruce, but they whet my appetite for what might be possible.   If I could be convinced that even one retrieval were genuine, it would change my life and make me a fanatic in my quest to master this art.  As it is, in about 8 days, I'm going to cease posting on this site and concentrate on developing my astral talents, so that I can practice doing retrievals.   Maybe I can retrieve Janet for real--if she still needs retrieving.

Good luck in your future efforts,
Don

quote Don below:

  I surprised myself by mentally yelling, "BUT I MUST SEE HER NOW!"   Instantly, I experienced one of the most powerful emotional bursts of energy I have ever experienced.  I can best describe it as a potent combination of love, intense rage at Janet's sorry plight, and an odd feeling of omnipotence, as if, just then, my word was law in the universe.
________________  

Don, I refuse to call you Berserk because...well, you're not berserk. perhaps Dr. Berserk is better.

there. take that. I just copied this one part of your retrieval, which yes, it was a retrieval. this was an experience for you, whether it occurred in dream state or reality you "felt" emotions. emotions should not be discounted as less than knowledge, as less than logic. emotions can be like unto rotes as well. we should study what they infer as they contain information about who we are, or who we perceive ourselves to be. we are more than our emotions also but they are useful tools to navigate the subconscious mind. you have tremendous love for this woman and love has to be a part of retrievals at some point. it has been my experience that when a person leaves this earth plane, suddenly, we forget all the pain they gave us, so that all that remains in memory is the love that was felt within the relationship. this should tell u something about the power of love to remain while the negativity does not. when you retrieved her, it was because of your love for her. your rage at her committing suicide enabled you to "bust" the veil between the two worlds. Just then, you say you felt "omnipotent." as if your word was law.

this is the truth of the matter. simply put your word IS law as soon as you recognize that it is. your word is law if reinforced by love. not selfish love, which wants to have things your way, but the kind of love that caused you to find Janet. She even told u she was OK but you are insistant she cannot be OK.  it was a very powerful experience which can change your entire life if you only could believe the power within love to transform. u have chosen knowledge over the heart path. hard concrete evidence remains your God and so be it. as for my opinion, I am thrilled at the measure of your PUL for Janet and wish you to go and have another experience with her as I think she loves you very much too. if u ever do this I hope it convinces you beyond  a doubt of our ability to continue on, growing, living, and loving and being in this together and I await impatiently for you to return and tell us what further journeys you make. ps. anytime you experience surprise in a dream scape, take note. surprise, like strong feelings, can widen our perceptions out there which includes here.

Dave..
I really liked your feedback and analogies. Since this is all new to me, I need to keep an open mind and go with it, and practice.
Thanks again for all the feedback from everyone here.

Steve