Vicky,
Thanks for the reminder that our imagination is the door, and not a diversion from the spirit world. I have been feeling that I am deceiving myself, as time passes between significant experiences in my spiritual life. But I know in my heart that what you say is true.

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Great post Vicky!

The only thing I would add is that we all need what I call "downtime" to process what we created in our life, and in our spiritual being during the "high" creative  period.  To me it's a time of reflection and contemplation.  As much as we love the highs, the "lows" are just as important.

Oh yes, I agree with you about writing.  I lost count of all the journals I've kept over the years.  It would probably take me another lifetime just to re-read them! lol

btw... if you haven't purchased a blender yet, Sam's catalog that I received a few days ago has the same one I have online for the same price I mentioned.

Bardo,

Sounds like you're getting there, and for all you know maybe you did do a retrieval but you don't remember that aspect of you doing it.  It sounds like there was a part of you that pulled away and that's where your awareness went. 

I've learned from experience that the breakthrough one is needing and waiting for is subtle but tricky.  Tricky in that you have to kind of fool the part of you that is skeptical, in doubt, or discouraged.  I think of it as two sides of me each trying to get what they want.  The doubtful side thinks it will always win and prevent anything from happening, so the curious side needs to be creative. 

At the point in your process where you were relaxed, meditative, committed, and had set intention, that's the point where the creativity comes in handy.  What works well for me is to tell myself that I've set my intention, so that means that I will treat the very next thing that happens to me as if it is in direct response to my intention.  No matter what happens, no matter what I experience, I'm going to act (pretend) as if it is exactly what I asked for. 

So the tricky part is not to let your doubtful or logical side take over and say, for example, "Well the very next thing I'm experiencing is seeing a flower.  That's silly.  Obviously it doesn't mean anything."  If you do that, the doubt is winning.  But if you just tell yourself, "Ok, I see a flower.  I'm going to stay in the process of my intention and "ask this flower" to take me to do a retrieval. 

Anything works, as long as you play the role.  You know you may still be doing some faking and pretending at this point, but the point is to bypass that part of yourself which is always going to pull you back logically.  Playing along with whatever comes next in your awareness is the key to pushing you through that doorway, that breakthrough needed to get you away from logical physical-world senses and thinking and move you to nonphysical reality awareness and senses. 

That flower could be a Helper disguised as a flower.  Or it could be your mind's way of trying to throw doubt in your way.  I just decide to trick myself and pretend it's exactly what I need to get me where I want to go.  Sounds weird but it works.  I think it works well because if you're already in a deeply relaxed state you're already halfway there because your mind is so suggestible in that state.  It's important to hold onto awareness of your intention, though, so that you don't get overtaken by dream sleep.  Holding onto conscious awareness is key, also will help you bring back memory of the whole experience when you're done.

By the way, I'm sorry too this conversation got off track but it's all good so that's ok.  I also wanted to mention to you that I've heard speaking in my right ear as well.  Others I know and trust have too.  I think it's a nonphysical phenomenon that we experience as if it's a physical sense of hearing.  I think it has to do with the way our psychic and nonphysical channels of communication work.  I actually experience it in normal waking life.  It's pretty interesting isn't it?  You'll have to do some investigating and retries to dig more into your experience.  Maybe you can get deeply relaxed again and see if you can remember more of your experience.   

Hey BobMoenroe,

Thanks for the suggestion.  It's an interesting idea and something that I'd probably enjoy doing.  I know I already do work on those things in my mind a lot (until I need a break) but I've never tried writing it.  I can see how writing it out would help, especially if I just let myself do stream of consciousness writing.  Would I ever want to go back and read it all?  Ha ha, I don't know.

Ok, the concept is fortunately simple and open ended enough to shape however one chooses.

My suggestion is to start with first breath, your mother giving birth, and keep going until now. Report and make comments where comments seem to be natural. Divide into chapters, starting with chapter 1, age 0 - 14?, and finish chapter 1 before going on to the next. Last chapter: So, where am I going from here?

Suggestions of things to keep in mind:

- Editing to keep it tidy but be honest about what's coming out on the screen. You're doing the reading and writing and no fingers are waiting in line to do their dance of judgements.

- During reviewing and writing your story, pay attention to what of the world and the people you've met that you've allowed to enter and take up residence in your being, and why did you open the door if hesitant? Some ideas might have helped you, some might be long over due?

- Loops, repeating events that keep on repeating are important, and may hint at unresolved issues. Maybe along the process you become aware of it's mere beginnings, and aware of sub loops that can help you dismantle bigger loops. The very same loops seem to go on with different persons and different circumstances until dealt with, finally and properly.

- Drinking water doesn't tend to be an addiction, but are you addicted to substances or circumstances? Why? How did it start out?

- Important choices, forks in the road - why did you choose how you did? Remember, honest and straightforward.

...I'm sure there are more.