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I lost my son last week (Read 9196 times)
ChantillyChopper
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I lost my son last week
Mar 20th, 2010 at 4:31pm
 
My son at the age of 29 passed last week of a brain tumor that we had no idea he had.  No signs until a few days before his death.  We had no idea until after the cause of death.   He had no after life beliefs, although I always told him about my communications with the afterlife, (since I lost my fiance almost two years to the day).  I think I have had one communication with him, where he told me to turn out the lamp in his room.  It seems that it had been on the whole time which was a week.  So of course we turned it off.   I am not sure if he is lost, confused, earthbound or if he has crossed over.  My other son and his girlfriend who also all lived together with my son who passed, and myself, have had those waves of extreme sickness to our stomachs.  I am not sure if we are picking up on him, or just the natural emotions that we all have.  We speak to him out loud and mentally telling my son to cross over or to ask for help if he is unsure of what is happening.  i try to assure him that he will be fine, that all will be ok, (he left behind his 10 yr old daughter and nephew), and they all were extremely close.   My nephew who also lived with my son who passed, told me that he felt his Uncle Tony was gone during the day, but came home at night. 

If anyone can at all pick up on my son or have suggestions I would love to hear from you.  Thanks.
Chantilly Chopper
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spooky2
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #1 - Mar 20th, 2010 at 9:44pm
 
You are in the middle of experiencing a heavy loss. There can't be anything harder than losing the own son. The main focus of you must be to be here, be you, and to allow yourself space to grieve for him, and to realise, accept this change in your life.

You can't estimate the time you'll get a message from him. First you need time to get balanced again after that hit. Then, and only then (except you are experienced in this) you should be receptive, or even active, to receive informations about him, or a communication with him. It is ok to just grieve. But have in mind he's gone only within one of those earth-time-planes.

That he hasn't had any beliefs about the afterlife is good rather than bad.

Spooky
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"I'm going where the pavement turns to sand"&&Neil Young, "Thrasher"
 
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b2
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #2 - Mar 20th, 2010 at 11:35pm
 
Our hearts are with you, Chantilly Chopper, for your sudden loss. With love.
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Pat E.
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #3 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 2:11am
 
Chantilly, at least some of us came to this site because of such losses and we can understand your pain and loss.  My daughter (then 38) committed suicide in Oct. 2008 and not a day, or even an hour, goes by that I don't think of her and miss her.  While the pain seems unbearable at first, you can bear it.  Later, it may come in waves of sadness, even after much time has gone by.  That happens for me often when I am grocery shopping, since my daughter lived with me and I bought groceries for both of us.  Having tears come in the middle of Trader Joes still sometimes happens after a year and a half.

Not long after Megan died, I read Joan Didion's "The Year of Magical Thinking" ad have recently reread it  Didion wrote this book in the year after her husband suddenly died.  Her daughter was gravely ill during that same time period and subsequently died after the book was published.  Didion writes so well that I loved each page of this fairly short book even though it frequently brought tears.  It speaks truthfully of much that is probably universal about loss and grieving.  I recommend it.

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betson
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #4 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 9:09am
 
Dear Chantilly C,

You have my condolences, dear soul.

Regarding your request, we've learned (or it's been suggested) to not attempt contact with passed souls for several weeks after their passing. Although there is no 'time' there are still states of change that they most move through and the first period is the busiest for them. 
You might take up as a mantra repeating that he' move toward the light.'
If you will PM me his name I'll try to check on him in a week or so.

Bets


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There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
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banana
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #5 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 1:48pm
 
Chantilly,
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my brother last year,Feb.19 2009. I think of him every day. His first visit to me was March 13. So it is just as Bets said give it a few weeks. Also it took him till Oct.15 to crossover. He was earthbound that long. Sometimes they need to take awhile to just crossover, I was also worried.  My first book I read that helped me and eased my pain was Elizabeth Kubler Ross's book on Death and Dying. She even had a section in it on the Afterlife. Please take your time to grieve and take care of yourself.
love,Anna banana
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Vicky
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #6 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 7:26pm
 
I'm so sorry to hear your son passed away, so suddenly and under such shocking circumstances.  I hope your family is coping ok.  I hope you get some communication from him soon.
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ChantillyChopper
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #7 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 10:58pm
 
To all of you, I thank you so much for responding.  And I knew he would be busy his first few weeks.  I have just been sick with worry that he might be confused.  Thats why we talk so much to him.  although my other son told me that they had been having conversations about parallel universes and such... and hopefully he listen when I spoke of afterlife and my communications and maybe he didn't think I was just crazy or something....but he always listened and he never said he didn't believe me.   

I wonder about the numbers , loosing my fiance March 19, 2008 and then my son March 9th, 2010, is there something there??   

Anyway, again, thank you all for your insight, your offer to help contact him, and your condolences.  It means the world to me.  I really can't express that enough.

Carla
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spooky2
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #8 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 11:39pm
 
Quote ChantillyChopper:
"I have just been sick with worry that he might be confused" "and hopefully he listen when I spoke of afterlife"

I believe when someone is not entirely denying the possibility of an afterlife, or holds very strong beliefs regarding punishment and such, then there should be no problems for the helpers to guide one to a good place.

Spooky
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"I'm going where the pavement turns to sand"&&Neil Young, "Thrasher"
 
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ChantillyChopper
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #9 - Mar 21st, 2010 at 11:42pm
 
Spooky, again I thank you!!

Chantilly Chopper
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ChantillyChopper
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #10 - Mar 22nd, 2010 at 10:03am
 
I shared this with Bets, in a pm....I forgot to speak of these two events....I have copied and pasted from my text to Bets....

I am going to mention this on the thread...because like I said, my brain is mush... but, the morning that I heard about my son, I was on my cell speaking to my daughter in law...(tonys daughters mother) and after we had spoken for awhile, (the whole time I am trying to get ready to get to my son, because I didn't want him to be dealing with the detectives by himself), and my phone has call waiting, and i saw that my son was calling me, so as I was trying to click over, in-between the connections... I heard in a whisper sounding type voice "I love you". I just knew that was my son. And i figure if he is going to communicate, a lot of it will be thru electronics...he is a computer tech, all around guru on this sort of thing. Also, we do not know the exact time of death, but my son got a video on his cell phone around 2am, and in this video there was a bunch of people standing around a firepit at night, and he could see people and hear them laughing and talking, the video lasted 13 seconds. He erased it because, he thought someone had sent it by mistake to his phone, their was no number attached to it, it just showed "fwd" as where normally you see who sent it. Well that night, we gathered at a friends house, and at that friends house, Tony's friends came over, and we all ended up around a firepit, talking, laughing, telling Tony stories. My son, who received the video, says he knows that Tony sent that to him, a prediction of the night events. So both of us received communication via cell phones in his first 24 hours. We are thankful for that.

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b2
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #11 - Mar 22nd, 2010 at 1:19pm
 
This is wonderful. Thank you for posting this, as I'm sure it will offer others some encouragement, that messages can come in many ways.
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ChantillyChopper
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #12 - Mar 22nd, 2010 at 1:29pm
 
Thanks B2,  I can't wait til I hear from him again, the mother in me needs to know he is working it out.  I just hope he has crossed or at the most, that he is not feeling as if he is alone, standing behind a glass wall yelling and shouting for us to hear him...I want him to cross so that he gets the bigger picture of life and afterlife.   Mommy loves you son!
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juditha
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #13 - Mar 22nd, 2010 at 3:14pm
 
hi chantillychopper my love and prayers i send to you and your family for the loss of your son,god bless him and you and your family as well.

you have mentioned sickness and sickness what you are feeling means that he is very close to you as when spirit come to near it can cause nausea,when you feel this sickness again he is there but say to him ,we love you and we are happy you are here but could you please step back a little as you are to close and he will.

at this stage he is not alone visiting you ,he is being given loving support from i'm getting his grandparents and im being shown them holding each of his arms to comfort as he is very nervous and its like when he was born on the earth plain he had to learn our language  get used to the world around him and this is whats happening now

because his passing has not been very long ago,he will hang around you very much so as he feels your heartache and he feels it to but as time goes on and you start to heal then he also will be able to move on and will then visit you when he wants to,its all part of the greiving process on his side and yours.

i'm being given the names here susan shane robert also lucy and i'm being shown that he had really dark hair,he's saying he is not alone ,hes being loved and helped by his family that have passed on.

i'm going to stop here as i am a practising medium sitting in circle and told by the medium in the circle that i must given what is given to me but i want to know if i am getting this right at the moment

if i am i will carry on and i'm so sorry if i have not got this right ,please reply and tell me if i am getting it right or wrong love to you and your family  god bless  love juditha
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ChantillyChopper
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Re: I lost my son last week
Reply #14 - Mar 22nd, 2010 at 3:22pm
 
Thank you Juditha, I responded by pm to you!!
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