So yeah. I joined this forum because i think i went crazy or something one night. I was sitting with a friend... smoking pot (dont want to hear any drug free nonsense it is a rare thing i do) and i was thinking about what it would be like to not exist. Then i felt like i felt what it would be like and all my hope in future drained out of me because i realized we are on the edge of our perception and we are biological organisms. Natural machines... our time on earth is pointless and our only destiny is to ensure the growth of the species... much like ants. I was like this for DAAAYS...

Then it went away. All the hope i had in an afterlife or god eventually came back and now im 50/50 again. Is this something serious? I had never had a break like that before. I am quite a normal 21 year old. I never had mental problems. I do think too much... and have always been obsessed with perception and it's meaning.. but not to the point where i let it effect me emotionally. Well i didn't let it do anything. it was like a temporary epiphany...

It was not the weed, i know that much. Weed does not give you life changing experiences. It makes you eat candy and take walks in the woods...

Thoughts?

Mr Jonnethon,
I'd say it is serious, but not necessarily in a negative way. As Bets said, you asked a question, and you came up with the closest thing it could find, to identify yourself with your body-machine, and the weed enhanced your imagination. You just made your mind up about an important question. This can be quite shaking.

In short, let the natural science talk about body & brain, but don't believe when it's concluded that you ARE your body&brain, because that's not scientific anymore. There's much stuff on the web about Near-Death-Experiences, out-of-body-experiences and such, read it and decide what it is on your own; you may even try some types of meditation, for example Bruce's method.

Spooky

As the guys say J, and welcome aboard.

Sounds like you got was some real insight into the futility of belief in the physical existence/individual self as the basis of all there is.

Most don't get that until they've done a lot of work to figure out why this may be the case (you may have unconsciously done so)/accessed the required state of consciousness (the weed might well have helped the latter)

To come face to face with the futility  of the default belief system we are almost all brought up in can be a traumatic experience even for those well down the road in spiritual terms. (shades of the dark night of the soul and all of that)

As the guys say the way across this sort of chasm is usually to start work on developing your insight into the more fundamental realities - to head off down the spiritual path. As this insight dawns the pain fades with the development of a different view of the nature of reality and existence.

Maybe you can find a more experienced person or spiritual group to help out - even if it's not the ultimate answer it'll probably help. (but try not to over commit, or set aside your own intuition) Tibetan or another form of Buddhism, or if you prefer to work alone and can handle heavier reading A Course in Miracles are worth a look, but there's lots more options too which others here may be able to suggest.....

It's me again. I just wanted to thank all of you kind people. I know I'm necro-posting, lame, but I doubt I'll be back to continue.

I don't think about those things anymore. Reading this is kind of embarrassing. But even after all this time I remember posting it. Time is so funny. Eternity seems so little to me now. I'm a finite being with finite thoughts that tried to comprehend something that isn't meant for me yet. Even the thought of not existing seems so natural and calming.

I lied when I said I was "over it and 50/50". I wasn't back then. I wasn't until late 2012. I was too worried about what people think of me, even anonymous internet people, to tell the absolute truth. Once more, thank you all for helping me out. The concepts introduced to me in this thread helped me more than I can relate at the moment. I read it all back then and took it to heart. I used to to help me break free of constant existential terror. Thank you so much.

Hello again, Mr. Jonathon,
and welcome back.We appreciate, I'm sure, that you would let us know that your questions are being answered by Life as well as by our attempts.

Your initial concern has been read by many people and most likely some of them have been helped by the discussion too.  I think that can wipe out any embarrassment from originally posting it.

I too overcame terror through the kindness of people here expelling their own trials and explorations.

Don't be a stranger, Mr. Jonathon (-: