Hi,

I'm a young woman and all of my life I have suffered from panic attacks relating death and what will happen to me after I'm gone. I am scared without any hope and really, don't know how to deal with it and how to continue my life in fear. Does anybody have kind words of reassurance/faith?

Anything is appreciated.

Hi KC, I assure you that you have nothing to worry about in regards to seeing your loved ones again once you drop your body and leave from this lifetime. You will be with everone you love should you and they be at a point where you are able to be together. It is very easy to get trapped by this physical lifetime experience. Of course that includes having this amazing tool, the body as well. Fear of death is something that is ingrained in you so that you have a strong desire to experience this lifetime and to give you the chance to learn from it. I strongly sudgest you read Bruces books and Bob Monroe's also. They both provide a lot of information. Read around this site and feel free to ask any questions that you may have. You might not always get the answers you are looking for but you will get a variety of view points. All can be looked at. Of course there are a few here that are a bit what you might call "different" (perhaps me included)but they mean no harm and there is always some lession to be learned. Have fun and welcome to a new adventure of learning about yourself.
Joe

Thank you for your words Hawkeye! I appreciate you took the time to write me.. I'd love to hear some more opinions if anybody is willing to say anything? Thank you so much

When I had my night in heaven experience I was an atheist. I was completely surprised and relieved to see that God and the afterlife exist. I also understood that Christ does play a significant spiritual role, but not in a prohibitive fundamentalist way. Not only did I understand these things, I understood how they were possible without having to think about it. It was like "Oh yeah, of course!"  When I say God, I'm not speaking in an old man in the sky sense.

I believe I was able to experience what I experienced despite my lack of belief in such things, because I was basically a good and loving person. Therefore, I believe our hearts will lead our way when we move on to the afterlife.  Each of us will see which of our beliefs are accurate and which aren't. It may be that if a person is really rigid about certain beliefs, these beliefs might bog he or she down for a while. Therefore, when it is time to move on, it is good to keep an open mind. I figure the same thing can be said while still making use of a physical body.




KC wrote on May 6^th, 2008 at 2:49pm:

KC, welcome. When you say that you experience panic attacks, what do you mean? What is happening to you? Are there any specific things that trigger these fears or have they come upon you recently?

I used to experience panic attacks of various sorts. The desire to rid myself of needless fright and negative thinking caused me to begin experimenting with meditation and meditation aids, such as guided imagery and chanting. Meditation, when used regularly, eliminated many of my fears.

However, I still did not understand death.

The unknown is sometimes frightening to us, no matter what the circumstances.

Reading and sharing the thoughts and experiences of others here, as well as the books of Bruce Moen and Robert Monroe, have put quite a lot into perspective for me. Reading some of the near-death experiences of others was also quite helpful to me.

Finding a way to experience life within the shelter of a greater understanding of how we are all connected in such mysterious ways has also eliminated many fears.

Death is as rich an experience if not richer, in my mind, as any of the wonders each of us has been offered here in our human lifetimes. Just think of it, all the love that you have ever experienced, you are taking with you. All the beauty you have ever witnessed, you are taking with you.

So, while you explore the meaning of death, explore the meaning of life more fully, by realizing that all that you love and value here, you take with you. It is yours, forever.

So, choose well, this life you live. Then, have no fear.

...there is nothing to fear, not really, love, blink

KC, there is a reason why you have suffered the way you have. The mind creates its own repetitive "loops" and it sounds to me, although I am not an expert by any means, that your mind has created such sensitivity in your body that mere whispers from your mind can create havoc, physically and emotionally, for you.

There are professionals in the fields of psychology and social work who have worked with panic disorders. They would have more information than me on some treatments, which you could consider. But, a spiritual approach, I think, can be just as effective for some people. Just sharing with those who have experienced fears such as yours, as you can see, helps you to know that you are not alone.

Trying some guided meditations, those which focus on confidence, self-esteem, spiritual strength, love and beauty, and others, might assist in calming your mind, body and emotions. You can definitely overcome your fears, by focusing directly on them and working through them.

I'm pretty sure that I'm "gonna die" just about every time I drive onto a freeway. However, there used to be a time when I couldn't even do it. It's not something I choose to do very much, but I can and will do it when I decide to do it. Guided meditation, focusing right on that topic, helped me.

You can even create your own guided meditations, if you want to.

I could tell you many other stories.

The point is, the Buddha says: It's your mind that creates this world.

Think about that. It's a very powerful statement.

Your mind. No one else's mind. So, be gentle with your mind, gentle with your heart. Give them time to create everything you need to be happy, and they will.

love, blink

One of the things that reportedly tends to happen in your sort of case KC is that having created something we fear (e.g. the thought that we might die) we start to push it away from us (we suppress  what we fear), and to as a result of our fear pump energy into it.

As Blink said 'with our minds we create our (the) world'.

This makes it grow as a separate entity within our mind ( a bit like schizo tendencies), and the loss of energy can come to make us feel very down too. It reportedly becomes a vicious circle in that the more energy we pump in the greater the fear becomes the more it frightens us the more it sucks our energy the more.... ad infinitum.

As ever stopping the flight (finding the courage to move towards and rest in the fear until we can with luck and work come to see that it's in truth just a delusional construction) and extending love in place of the hostility seem to be the answer - until we do this we keep on giving it existence as a growing 'demon' (not Hollywood style) or a separated part of mind.

I posted before about the Tibetan Buddhist practice of Chod which is designed specifically to deal with this sort of problem by this means. This book by an American nun named Tsultrin Allione sets it out in more detail: http://books.google.ie/books?id=yJEUIQAACAAJ&dq=inauthor:Tsultrim+inauthor:Allio...

She also has a CD out there on the topic named Cutting Through Fear which is pretty widely available (it showed up in our local bookshop): http://www.namsebangdzo.com/Cutting_through_Fear_Tsultrim_Allione_p/11729.htm

Another Buddhist nun Pema Chodron has written on the subject of dealing with fear too, this time by slightly different means: http://www.amazon.com/Places-That-Scare-You-Fearlessness/dp/1570624097
She presents a more comprehensively argued view if you are of a thinking inclination.

Both in my experience set out very effective practices, although the effectiveness is probably linked to  developing a degree of meditative skill. (my experience was in dealing with fear and a sense of failure when ill, my path was via meditation and not unlike Blink's) I found Buddhist and other spiritual perspectives on the nature of existence very helpful too - they in very logical terms tend to point out that while death is a change of state we can't die.

The guys have already mentioned how 'non-ordinary' experience can help, although that too for most of us requires work and practice to access as well. Bruce Moen's books are not a bad place to start, and are a lot more accessible than more traditional approaches: http://www.amazon.com/Afterlife-Knowledge-Guidebook-Retrieval-Exploration/dp/157...

One caveat is probably as implied above. Viewed using more 'scientific' language this sort of fear is presumably the result of a view or conclusion having been imprinted in our mind - usually at an early age when we couldn't see past it, and usually at a deep level we don't have access to in normal consciousness.

Meditation is one way of accessing the required levels, but depending on the state of your mind it usually takes quite a bit of time and practice. Stuff like the Monroe Institute's Hemi Sync tapes, holotropic breathwork and even the likes of Brandon Bay's 'Journey' CD are probably worth exploring as ways to help speed up the process too.

This most definitely is not a recommendation, but various 'substances' like marijuana and other  stronger agents (it's reputed) if used correctly can facilitate the required access too, with the selection of agent depending on the levels at which you are carrying the issue.

These things can also be (slowly) nibbled away at from normal levels of consciousness its seems too - by making quite explicit exactly what it is that we fear, and using logic, research, psychotherapy, experience (perhaps non-ordinary experience as reported by guys here) or whatever to overturn the old logic.

There's (without a lot of luck) no instant answers, but there are lots of ways and means. It starts with turning inwards and beginning the journey of self discovery. Most of us started from one or other position of personal crisis......

vajra, thank you for the recommendations on the tapes and books. I will look into them to see which one would interest me a little more. The idea of reincarnation is something that, again most silly, scares me. I read (here) it's a personal choice based on your spiritual travels when you hit the afterlife. Will you reincarnate or not?
Right now, it's a no. Then again, I'll see how time unravels things. I'll repeat that it's hard to stay still with my thoughts, do you think seeing a panic attack specialist would help and then starting with the meditation?
Thanks again