Welcome back, Juditha.

You made it into my gratitude journal this morning. You will be there for all time. Or at least until my notebook falls apart.

love, blink

Juditha:

Related to what Don wrote, you never know who people at a spiritualist group are communicating with.  Perhaps it would be better to focus on spiritual growth, rather than developing medium skills.


Berserk2 wrote on Jan 17^th, 2008 at 3:00pm:

Hi Juditha- 
Although it's not always obvious, there are a lot of us who love you and are here for you in any way we can be. I'm glad that you've come through and are getting back into the regular world again.

Incidently, as you review your motives, notice that there is a vast difference between wanting to suicide in order to get out of a terribly frustrating situation - which is actually a desire for a better life - as compared to feeling that nothing has value and life is meaningless etc, which is a sign of an true clinical depression. If what you truly desire is a better life, then you might consider getting pissed off enough to make it happen.   

Family issues can be a nuisance. There is a myth that "love is enough" - but experience teaches us that marriage is built on hard work by both partners. In fact, when both partners start out by working at it, love comes along on its own later. But it doesn't always work the other way around. When the effort of both partners is insufficient, then it's time to work out a separation of some kind by which the family still can get together,  the kids still have parents, and everybody can relax. The goal should be to find a living arrangement in which there can be love, as opposed to the hostility and blame that often is present in such cases. This can be as simple as an agreement to be more involved with one another, or to make love more often, or to have a day off for personal activities once a week, or it can be as extreme as a divorce. In any case, it is not a matter of guilt or blame that things don't work, but simply recogntion that a change is needed because initial planning was inadequate.

It's important to realize that change means that everyone in the family must be involved in changing. It's not something that can be dumped on your husband, nor on you, nor on any other single person, because the dynamic is a family dynamic. If you are seeing a counselor for personal (non-family) issues, that's good. But you can't handle the family in a single personal therapy session. That's not possible, nor is it the purpose of the session. Most therapists know this.

After dealing with your personal (non-family) issues, the family should be included in a family therapy session. To make this fair to all, the family therapist should be different from the personal therapist, otherwise it rarely is effective. (This is a professional observation based on 30+ years of clinical experience.) Those who refuse to cooperate with family counselling are opting out of the family, so you can discount them afterwards as you make future plans.

As a psychic, you have undertaken a relatively bold lifestyle that will bring you into contact with others who didn't stop in time, and who are now feeing pretty wretched in the spirit world. Having had that experience, and having recovered from it, you can use your knowledge for their benefit. This requires you to be as brave as the soldier who is cut off, alone, surrounded, and who still mounts the barricades to attack the enemy. Your chosen lifestye is one that defies death, and it might be useful to put a little reminder of this where you can see it from time to time.

At the same time, you might put up a little reminder that we love you.

PUL
dave

Hi all of you my dear friends I love you all,thanks for all that you have written to me,my husband came back because of my suicide attempt just to give me support but as i am now getting support from my children and Deanna,we have called it a day once and for allbut this time we have parted with a better understanding and have decided to stay friends,no more getting at each other over the reason we are divorceing as we both know now ,we cannot live together anymore,so i feel that i must now sttart to move on in my life and to think positive from now and not negative,i love you all and thanks so much for your love and support .

Love light and God bless   love juditha

Juditha, I feel that you are doing so well, and my heart feels happy knowing you are finding your way through these difficulties. I have remained friends with my ex and it is still sometimes emotional for me, because I occasionally feel a little sadness.

But it is endlessly gratifying to know that we are still genuinely needed and appreciated by each other, and that we have overcome any old resentments. I am greatly looking forward to the day, in fact, when he might find another mate who can share his life with him, and I know he will.

It just takes a long time to get through these things, but having a child to raise is a commitment which you can always hold as a blessing between you. I do sometimes envy you, Juditha, because I never had that. No children, no grandchildren. No siblings nearby with children, no friends with children....except at my job, where they run through the office hallways during office parties screeching and careening and cartwheeling and certainly examining everything within a 360 degree radius with extreme stealth obvious to all.

I guess I've never enjoyed the 24 hour a day variety of childhood except...well, a long time ago.

So, I envy you, Juditha. Please, enjoy your life. You see, vicariously, I secretly do...

much love, blink

Hi Juditha
I'm glad that you came to a new agreement with your ex. Sometimes, in order to love someone, we need to be far enough distant that we don't get involved with the trivia of life because we just don't do it the same way. But love is valuable, even if we can't live together. And kids will learn by example that even though things are changing, there's really nobody to blame. And both parents remain loving, even if they bring in new companions into their personal lives.

In my life I was fortunate to find a wife (not the first) who brought an entire family of 4 kids with her. The oldest (in his 20s at the time) was terribly shocked when she said, "The sex is good," - in fact he still is shocked when she says it, despite the fact that he's matured greatly and runs the cardiac program in his hospital. But they provide an extended family that has merged with me and my daughter. Her ex is a nice guy - I like him, and we get along well. Everyone gets along, and now that their situation is less constricted, my wife and her ex get along quite well too. We all get together and it's OK.

In the same way, the new life awaiting you, Juditha, need not be destructive of the past, but rather it can build on it for everyone's benefit.

dave

Quote:


Juditha, Thank you for sharing your emotions with us. I am very proud of you for that takes alot of balls, and your a girl and hmmmm dont think you have those kinda thingy-ma-jigs..  

You and I both "know" that killing oneself will not relinguisch the "pain" as you and I both know that there is an afterlife  and the condition inwhich we go home in, will be the conditional state inwhich one arrives. Think about that just a moment my dearest love.

You have a "lifetime" inwhich to learn to love yourself (not to be misunderstood as being selfish) , but you have to find out "who am I" first.

Are YOU your body or are YOU your soul. Its not selfisch to love both of them honey.

If you were to have succeeded in taking your life, ask yourself now consciously for just a minuite -  "When I would have crossed over, would I still have felt the anguisch as I felt that very moment of committing suicide?" Do you honestly believe that killing yourself would change the way your soul feels? Sweetheart my strength goes out to you this very min. as I know this will be sort of hard to read without sheading a tear. But continue.

Understand that your body is merely a house inwhich your soul lives in, the real Juditha is your soul, so burning down the house inwhich Juditha lives in only gets rid of the house, not the occupant.

Your soul is hurting Juditha, it seems to me that you feel lonely, that you feel unwanted and less desireable than eariler in your years. I have the best medication for such: Its called love for oneself.

Sweetie, I know that you believe in God and I know that Jesus is in your mind. So I remind you that SINCE you know this, you can always find strength and comfort by "loving yourself for those two factors are real for you, no one can ever take them away from you".

This turning point is positive for you, not negative Juditha. You are now more aware of LIFE. It must have shocked you to see that you are capable of such through free will.

Question for you is:
Which road are you going to take.

Are you going to take the road of a victum, blaming society, your surroundings, your life, maybe your upbringing.

Or

Are you going to take the road of a survivor and cast out the negative thoughts by "replacing" them with positive ones such as using the YES word moreoften, or doing something pleasent, even if its only one thing for "yourself" everyday?

See, in being good to your body Juditha, you pet your body.
and in being good to yourself Juditha, you pet your soul.
Your soul rewards you when you pet it, love.

Start replacing the "bad thoughts" with good ones daily.
In doing so you take repsonsibilty for yourself and inwhole you love yourself.

You dont have to be ashamed for what you attempted to do Juditha, however you will have to be ashamed if you ignore why you did it though. I am not ashamed of knowing you inspite of your admitting, matter of fact I am delighted to be able to converse with you.

Juditha, as you can tell - I`ve been there - I am back to tell you, its not what I thought it would be and the anguisch was exactly the same, so I had to make a choice: The choice had to be made only by myself, no one else could even help me make it. I had to choose a change in my inner direction. I am here to tell you that I know that you too can make that change in inner direction and from that moment on you`ll be free from all those grinding negative thoughts - forever - for it is the greatest love of all to love oneself, and that truely is the love of God!

Incidently I want to tell you something else too. Once you learn to love yourself, you won`t be co-dependant on what others think, say or do concerning "you", for then you have found your best friend right within yourself. And all those times inwhich you yearn for the acceptance of others will vanish, you begin to radiate a whole new frequency of "light". Welcome, you are now a survivor, like myself and you can build a whole new lifes direction on that by spreading love and light.

Hugs,
Nanner