We have the awareness aspect of being, and the creative aspect of being. Kundalini seems to represent the creative aspect of being. Since the act of reproduction is a creative act, kundalini and sexual energy are associated while we are physical.
In order for reproduction to take place, some sort of sex drive needed to be encoded within us. A female lizard is programmed to respond to the pink throat of a male lizzard. A human male is programmed to respond to curves (Why are curves such a big deal?).
Human beings connect lust with their attempt to obtain love and oneness, because of their misidentification with the physical body. If you believe you're a body, quite naturally you'll try to obtain love and oneness with another body. Lust confuses the issue, because lust could care less about what is loving and wise. Resultantly, things such child molestation, rape, porn, prostitution and sexual perversion result.
I believe that one of our main goals as spirit beings is to gain control of our creative aspect of being. Other wise, it controls us and determines what we experience. Sexual attachment is a problem because it causes us to be confused and limit our ability to find love and oneness spiritually.
Some of my energy is bogged down in my lower chakras because I haven't been able to let go of the attachment of believing that love and oneness are available in an "essential" way, by becoming involved with a woman I find physically attractive. My spirit guidance has let me know in various ways that once I let go of this attachment, the amount of love and oneness I'll experience on a consistent and effortless basis will improve significantly.
Here is something I've gone through while trying to overcome my attachment. I feel like this is having an effect, but not completely yet.
1. It isn't possible for that woman's body to either create or send love. Love and oneness come from spirit and don't require the existence of a physical body in order to be.
2. It is also impossible for my mind's image of that woman to create or send love. Love and oneness come from spirit, and don't require the existence of an image in my mind in order to be.
3. It is impossible for a woman's body or my body to experience love and oneness. They are just objects of perception. Only awareness, which doesn't require the existence of a physical body, can experience love and oneness.
Another thing I consider is how my mind's image of a woman's body has very little to do with what a woman's body actually is. The image I have is just a very partial interpretation. In truth a woman's body is a biological organism made up of organs, cells and numerous biochemical reactions. Even her skin, which seems so appealing to my deluded mind, is just an everchanging cell culture. Plus, why is one type of look more appealing than another kind of look? For example, why are sharp facial features often considered to be more attractive than less sharp features? Or why is one set of eyes supposedly more pretty than another set of eyes?
I buy into the above delusions because they provide me with an arbritary just pretend mindset that enables me to have an energy build up that leads to the pleasure of sexual orgasm. The guidlines for such delusions could've manifested in various ways, they just happened to manifest in the manner they manifested.
In the end I don't believe we can have our cake and eat it. If we want to be able to experience love and oneness completely, we have to be willing to let go of the limitations that prevent us from doing so. Sometimes this isn't an easy thing to do. I've been completely celibate for almost a year now. It hasn't been hard. However, I still feel like turning my head when an attractive lady walks by. When will I ever learn?