Hi I and Deanna went to the healing last night and we did nothing wrong to anyone and they were horrible to us especially george who runs it,only problem is as usual ,cant work out why,im seriously thinking of giving up trying to be a medium as i think,if i was meant to be a medium ,there wouldnt be so much opposition in my way,im so fed up with it ,its always the twins,everywhere we go,me and deanna would not be here if it wasnt for the fact,that we love our children,but i know we wouldnt commit suicide,but we know ,when we get to the spirit world,we will be home,because God loves us,im sorry for writing this ,but this is the only place we seem to be accepted,me and Deanna were crying last night,trying to work out why. I said to deanna ,there does not seem many more places we can go,if it wasnt for my children,i would want to die and be with dad.

Love and God bless   Love Juditha

Juditha,

I'm so sorry to hear that the meetings/healings are still not going well.  I'm starting to feel like no matter what you and Deanna do, George is going to act ugly anyway.

I agree with Blink, that maybe it's just not the place for you and Deanna to to be.  Is there another spiritulist church you girls could try to attend besides the one you're currently going to?

I don't think you two should give up.  If you truly have a calling for this, something has to work out.  Keep your chin up, okay?

Luv,
Katie

I'm with Kate - f they don't treat you well, then the heck with them.  Unfortunately there is often a time at which we have gained all we can fromone set of circumstances and friends and need to move on. Job Number One is to see to your own welfare, because then you can see also to the welfare of others. That's why the Flight Attendants on the airlines say to put on Your oxygen mask first, so that you'll still be there to put one on your kids etc.

By the way - since when did mediumship ever have to do with "fitting in" - I don't get the impression that you're a sheep.

dave

That sounds like people with social problems, if you ask me. Stay away from them, and find another place. I'm sorry it didn't work out.

Juditha, I've been in a few churches and I never saw anyone sit on someone's lap, thats too friendly if u ask me. maybe you can find another place to develop your talents?

trust yourself.

I had been wondering what your problem is, that you and Deanna complain that you are not accepted anywhere.   On re- reading your description, it looks like you are part of the problem: your social behavior.

You need to work on ordinary social skills. This is about knowing where people are coming from, why they do what they do, and what is an appropriate and reasonable response to them, that will handle the situation.

Hi Juditha. My thought is that it might help if you thought about the situation a little differently. When we start feeling that we don't fit in or that we are being discriminated against we can very easily slide into seeing situations that way all the time.

It's to do with the way we perceive - we always pick the information out of a situation to support our pre-conceived view of what's going on. Lose your purse and you blame the shifty looking guy that walked through an hour ago, have it all figured out how he took it when you went to get coffee. And then you find it on your bedside table when you go home.

If people behave badly towards you a more loving and more constructive approach may be to stay centred for a while, show godwill by your actions and and try to see what's going on while if needed acting to stay clear of trouble. Above all allow them space by not responding with anger.

They may cop on, and either way you won't worsen the situation. If for whatever reason they still keep on being nasty then it may be that you can't teach them anything - that they are not open to it and that you might be better to step away. Either way if your behaving well doesn't produce a result you at least know that it wasn't anything you did that caused the problem.

On perceptions. I've no idea what the story with the situation or with George and that lady was, but regardless of the rights and wrongs maybe they had something  going on that meant they were focused on each other and not on being polite to you. But meant no harm.

Maybe Deanna felt a little put out at what was going on, and as a result came back a little more aggressively than she otherwise might. Maybe it would even have been polite or right for her to clean up. (or not, I don't know) Maybe the lady is a bit stressed out over her husband being ill, and was a bit tetchy. Or wanted some privacy with George. Or consolation from him. Or whatever.

And when things were said maybe you piled in because you felt you had to defend Deanna, and with the slightly heavy vibe that had developed maybe responded in a way that was always going to up the ante even more.

Or maybe the church is a crock, and maybe many of the people involved as a result of their own problems and inadequacies do behave in less than friendly ways.

Maybe you need to step away from it and find another healthier outlet. But maybe you have too much invested in your membership of it to do that  - maybe you somehow feel that your personal value is somehow tied up in it.

Regardless it's not wise for anybody to get sucked into getting angry or trying to force it to change, or feeling bad because they are not treating you as you would like. You can only bring about change through your own example.

You have to figure it out for yourself Deanna. But remember one thing - don't worry about what people  might be thinking of you because they are normally far too busy thinking about themselves.

Even if they come out with stuff (a) it's meaningless in that it doesn't determine your worth, and (b) they forget it like a shot unless you keep on by your behaviour reminding them to do it again.

Hang in there, and be careful you're not by your fears creating the reality you don't want....

Hi Boris,The only thing i can say is Ive tried so hard through my life and so has deanna,the reason for such negativity in the outside world towards us is something we cant understand or completely come to terms with,we are loving and caring were ever we go,we have had this since we could understand what the word thick means,we were called the divvy twins since we were little and all through our lives ,because we are having trouble living in the outside world and what i mean by that is that, i dont go out anymore apart from going to the mental health centre as im afraid to go out and that is because my fear is meeting someone i know and they are going to put me down as a person.

The centre know of this,this woman at the centre called Corrine has the same problem as me and deanna and she needed to go across the road to get something in the town which she really needed, so Corrine came to me nearly crying and asked me to go with her because she was afraid,so i went with her but we held on to each other as Corrine said to me,If anyone laughs at us or puts us down,we can lean on each other.

The only other place i will go is the spiritualist church,and that was just what i and deanna thought was a place were you could feel like you could be understood for the way we were,but we have decided never to go there again.I do not go out anymore only to the centre,were they understand that i cant face the world out there no more.

Im glad that you can look the world in the face and you have the strength to do that but i and deanna have not got that strength,we had all our human rights taken away from us,we were crying to the preist on thursday at the centre and told him if it wasnt for our children who we love so much ,we both would be gone from this world,our children are the one thing we got right.

We have been treat since we were children,that we were some freak of nature,the one  who knows that we have always tried to be kind loving and good is God ,he knows why we are like we are and that church is supposed to be working along side spirit and spirt is love and they dont know what the word love means,we have had this negativity from that church for a long time now and we had just come to the end of it ,thats why we stood up for ourselves because it goes deep ,the hurt and the pain of mental torture all our lives,we are better off in the mental health centre ,its were we belong,and we do fit in there.

This is the email Deanna sent to the church ,the same night we got home.

My sister Judy and I are never going up the spiritualist church again ,the reasons are ,we are treated like we are a piece of dirt ,like we are fools and we have had enough ,I personally wouldn't go out of my way to hurt anyone ,Judy and I are singled out for people to have a go at for nothing or to be ridiculed ,for everybody's amusement,Judy and I go to a center because we have been treated this way and it has made our nerves bad ,we don't need it at the church as well ,its best for us to keep away ,we started to go to the church because we lost our beloved dad and this is what we get ,I thought it was supposed to be a place where you could go to come to terms with losing our dad ,a place to be able to talk freely about the way we felt and to get some understanding in our lives which we have not had a lot of , I was very hurt tonight up the church I went home and cried , I hope you don't mind me writing to you Mathew about this issue I just had to put how I felt and my sister felt concerning the church ,we will go elsewhere now ,you take care Mathew ,hello to Tracy, hope your both well love Diane god bless

Love and God bless   Love juditha