Juditha, this maybe a personal question, but what has happened in your life? That makes you contemplate suicide?

I really think you need to look into doing some growth work, meaning find yourself a good healer someone you feel comfortable with and begin the process of releasing all the pain thats traped in your body.

Juditha, I know how it feels to want to leave this dimension, but the truth is your here to grow, thats why your higher self has planed your life as it is. Theres something held within your pain that you are to learn from,it maybe strenght ,it maybe empathy, it maybe compassion. But beleive me there is a reason.

And please dont think that your pain stops for pain is our greatest teacher or that once you pass over your learning stops, for this is not how the hole thing works. All that takes place when you pass is your consciouness is moved into another dimension, it maybe a more expaned and aware dimension, yet it is still one designed so as there are challenges and by that you still have tests. Its all about growth my little lovely, Nothing ever stops, it just keeps going on and on .

Please stay strong, you can do it you can work through these issues and when you do you will see why they where the way they where. You need to look deep within your self to find the answers but the answers are there.

Love to you

I too have my problems with depression, although most days I'm ok. I don't really know what to say, Juditha, except hang in there, and please talk with someone, anyone, when you are down, because it might help. If we live on after death, you will probably feel much better about not having comitted suicide, and if we don't..well, let's not go there.

Hang in there Juditha - as above it's the hard bits that tend to really help us to learn, and I don't think that that's a way out as the issues will still be left there to be resolved some other time.

My own experience has been that it took a lot of pain and illness to start to waken me up. To knock  me down to the point where I was prepared to open to the possibility that my take on what mattered in life was wrong.

Much of it I think was karmic (past life) in origin (or just the luck of the draw) in that my life circumstances conspired to condition me to need to go in the wrong headed direction that I did. So that I was eventually faced with issues the avoidance of which required conscious decisions.

Even though my heart had screamed for years that my direction was wrong I didn't listen until 12 years of depression, chronic fatigue and serious illness forced me to start looking inside. Life tapped me gently on the shoulder, then gave me a good shake but eventually had to resort to a heavy slap in the ear to get my attention.

The good news is that right now I'd not trade my life path for another. It was a close shave, and things are (while still not a bed of roses) a lot better now but the result was to force me to confront issues in my life view which had to be resolved to firmly place me on to a path which I'd never have otherwise been open to.

Meditation has been of huge assistance to me - it created space in a very intense, tunnel visioned, driven  and closed mind, and eventually came to give rise at times to a rather magical joy, to the PUL feeling.

Buddhism and similar spiritual perspectives helped enormously too by providing a framework through which to both make sense of what was happening, and to access meditation and the other tools and the vision needed to start getting out.

The resulting space  enabled me to take a wider look at my life, and has allowed me to drop lots of problem causing conditioned behaviours.

Your own situation no doubt is very different, but maybe there's something you can draw from my story which will help. The one thing I've drawn from my experience is that I can trust that life brings us what we need. That while the medicine may be bitter at times that the doctor is infinitely caring and compassionate..

Well written, Bruce. I'm newish here, so it's nice to finally see a post by you. That was your 199th one. May your 200th one be superduperawesome. ^^

Hi Bruce,vajra,bets and stjerneeksplosjon and Joe Thanks for all your advice and you have all made me see that suicide is not the answer,,so i am going to keep trying and maybe i will get there in the end and i would love to write that that storie for you bets,i  have written short stories but not spiritual fiction but i will give it a go.Thanks Joe and i have got to stop letting others around my life making me feel this way and thanks for saying i have so much to give and stjerneeksplosjon hang on in there as well i send my love and prayers to you as i know how depression can make you feel,vajra i realise now that im not the only one that suffers from pain and depression and i will try and confront my issues to move forward and bruce i did not realise till you told me that after death from suicide you still take those feelings with you so im going to try and take your advice and try to do something more constructive with my life.
Thanks again to all of you.
Love and God bless you all    Love Juditha

Hi Juditha-
I totally agree with Bruce.  It seems that after we try to escape from the world of today's troubles, we simply go on to tomorrow's troubles which turn out to be the same ones that we were trying to escape today, except that we also have to go through another childhood and adolescence to get there. In other words, not only do we not really escape, but we waste time and effort that could much better be put toward solving whatever our situation is.

In my estimation, if you are going to a place where everyone talks of suicide in a depressing manner, then probably this is not very good at improving your outlook. One simple solution is to change to a place you like better. Identicat has the idea - you could volunteer your services at any of dozens of places where people will love to have you there to help out. Working as a stockroom helper at a Goodwill store, Salvation Army store, or local Thrift Shop a day or two weekly - or more - or working with kids, or the aged (old farts like me), or reading to someone who is sight impaired, and so on - all of this is useful and creates a sense of being useful.

However, the other side of this is to realize that by your presence on the forum here you are contributing. I doubt that you ever thought of it in quite that manner, as most of us seem more interested in our own perspective, and solving personal issues, but you are among those gifted with psychic abilities, and your input is meaningful to others.

Very often people with significant psychic abilities are also those who come into this world with a fairly heavy load of karma to work through. That presents itself in the life situation into which we put ourselves. To elect rebirth under conditions in which one has a lot of stuff to work through is an heroic choice. Invariably, when such people are questioned they indicate that they have chosen to learn to love, to create joy in the world, and to handle whatever it was that was happening in the past in a useful manner, even at the cost of their own happiness. Chances are that this is more or less what you decided. To my mind, that kind of choice merits both respect and support. And, if you'll look around for a moment, you might notice that everyone here is on your side.

Some people throw up their hands in despair,  others take what they have and use it to build a new reality for themselves. Some retreat into the world of alcohol, or into street drugs, others blame the fates for their condition and retreat into psychiatric medications that numb them. There are a lot of ways to check out.

And then there's the other bunch who came here to handle business, and they do just that! They have ups and downs. They have good days and bad days. And they keep at it somehow, in the process of which they often accumulate a lot of friends. I'd be inclined to put you in this group. You seem to be advancing as a spiritual person as well as a competent psychic, and you definitely have accumulated a lot of friends. As your psychic skills advance, you are also gaining respect. (I personally have been fascinated by watching, and I notice that over time your insights are deeper and more meaningful. Since I happen to have the psychic ability of a brick, I'm also a bit envious.)

If I might suggest, pick a future that looks good for you. Perhaps you can see yourself as a member of an organization, for example your present psychic church, or some other group, in which you give readings on the weekends, or at fairs and festivals. Or maybe you see yourself in some other light. No matter, just have a look and see what the future can hold. Place the thought of suicide up against the old habits of thinking and feeling, since that's what you were trying to get rid of, and start a new life that leads into the future vision that you see.  Yesterday is over and done with - unless you want to drag it along - and if you leave it behind, you can move onward. That way, today becomes the first day of a new life without the bother of having to replace a perfectly good body.

And don't hesitate to call on us for support. The light that you spread may be invisible to you, but not to others, since it is God's own Light shining through you, and God doesn't make junk. We love you unconditionally, just because you exist as you.

PUL
dve

Juditha:

I echo what everybody is saying. I haven't come accross one source which states that suicide is a good decision. Spirits always regret it.

I've experienced very little depression during my life,  but I used to experience a background of fear. Eventually found out it was due to my fear of supposed demons and such. Once I faced these concepts and got over them, I stopped experiencing a background of fear.

I know some people will say that depression is genetic, but I've read some studies and found that the statistics don't support this viewpoint. It is a viewpoint formulated by medical doctors who are scepticle about things such as the World of spirit. According to them everything has a biological answer. They'd rather prescribe drugs than try to help a person psychologically.

My feeling is that sometimes depression is something people experience when they cover up an inner fear. It is hard to let love and happiness into our lives, when our heart chakra is energetically clogged with fear based issues we haven't dealt with.

Perhaps you have never completely gotten over the fear you experienced when you and Deanna saw that demon you saw when you were little girls.  For a while my spirit guidance showed me demonic images. Some of these were silly looking. This might seem odd, but it was their way of letting me know that I don't have anything to be afraid of. One time while meditating I heard a voice say: "You never take a look behind them." I understood right away what was meant. If you look behind a negative image projected by a spirit, you'll see that there is nothing behind the image to substantiate it as an actual reality. Just as you can create imagery with your mind, a spirit can create an image with its mind.  So don't make the mistake of believing that the demonic looking spirit you and Deanna saw as children, actually looks like it appeared. Probably just some mean hearted earth bound spirit who tried to make itself look creepy, in order to scare a couple of young girls.  If you looked at the true nature of that spirit, you would find that it is inately divine like all other spirits. It is just that it was confused about who it was. It is hard to imagine how a spirit who is so confused, could have the power to do anything to harm you and Deanna. The fact of how it didn't harm you and Deanna, shows that it didn't have the power to do anything, except to play stupid Halloween games.

There is another way to consider this. The imagery of this spirit was probably based on biological structures. Perhaps a pair of fangs, wierd looking eyes, or some scars.  Spirit energy "can't" actually be limited and defined in such a way. The spirit you saw just made itself appear in such a way.

The fact of how you have gone all these years without some evil spirit getting the best of you, shows that you don't have to worry about one doing so. How could a spirit who has turned its back on love and God, have power over one who hasn't done the same, such as yourself?

When it comes to confused negative minded spirits (I WON'T CALL THEM EVIL), don't believe the hype.