Conversation Board - Trying to stay afloat.

DaBears

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #15 - May 4^th, 2007 at 5:49pm

Fetography wrote on May 3^rd, 2007 at 9:54pm:

Thanks you all so much for your support.

I'd reply to each of your posts in more detail, but even typing this message is a challenge due to how weak my body is right now. What I can say is that months back, when I was approaching what seemed to be the end of the cliff, I was in bed sobbing. At that point I was so broken and defeated that I thought I would never get out of bed again. The realization came that as soon as I lost my religion I lost my wellness. That night I gave every fiber of my being to Christ, I told him that I was his.

Things got a bit better, but after listening to my brother (who is an atheist) my faith weakened a bit. Soon I began watching documentaries on Christianity and could not support the faith at all. The nail in the coffin was when I turned on the religious channel to find a preacher shouting that some day "all hospitals will be Christian hospitals" and so forth. What I crave in organized religion is the community and support, what I hate is the corruption.

From that point on I didn't know who to pray to. Even worse, I was afraid that maybe Christ really is God and that I had denied him. That's one thing I hate about Christianity...they scare the crap out of you...

I am afraid that I am disrespecting God by praying to him not knowing who he is.

Regarding some statements and questions posted:
I currently have agoraphobia, panic disorder, social anxiety, generalized anxiety, bdd, paranoia, depression.
I am on medication and have been in counseling/therapy for the past four years (still am).

Bets,
I am very much so into art and design; it is my passion.
Talking to you (or anyone) would be very comforting.

I am really in agreement with all of your beliefs...though I am still very confused on what to do about prayer. The list of angels was very helpful, though they are of the Christian faith aren't they?

There's a lot more that I wanted to talk about / respond to, but i'm really worn out right now.

Thanks again for all of the support and love,
Sam

Sorry to hear about your illnesses that have caused you suffering.. I myself too suffer from general anxiety disorder, ocd, paranoia, and depression.. It is rough and I feel your pain..!! I may not feel your pain all the way, but I know how tough it is on the soul.. Just please hang in there and never take your life.. I know I think about it too sometimes, but remember your family is going to be hurting for a long time if you take your life! Also, don't worry about Christianity, it is all fear based anyways and imo takes a toll on your soul.. I would just follow your own path to God! What ever brings you closer to God is the best Religion imo!! Most NDE's would agree on that one as well.. So, don't worry about what religion to belong too .. It's all about finding God your own way that is why we are all different and individuals.. Don't let preachers or others tell you how to believe or worship.. God doesn't want us to worship himherGod wants us to be his/her friend and us to be his/her own sons and daughters.. Because we are God's sons and daughters! Never let any religion tell you are not worthy of heaven/God and born a sinner.. We are all perfect in God's eyes! We are made in God's image..!

I believe meditation and enjoying the nature outsided are te best waysto connect with God.. You can connect with God in anyway possible.. Not just by going to church.. Being with your family and friends is another great way to connect with God.. By spreading love and taking in the love.. Also, being kind to others and helping others out is another way to connect with the true Godhead.. God is in you and will never leave you! Just have daily conversations with God and let God know how bad you are hurting.. God always listens to us.. God is helping you out now by getting you to ask for guidance and support!

Hang in there !!

peace

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spooky2

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #16 - May 4^th, 2007 at 10:09pm

Yes, DaBears is right Sam. You know, to have a religion and being a member of a church has on many people a stabilizing function.

However, following strict rules without thinking and without personal experience, always fear included, is not going to make the people feel happy and free. In Germany, where I am, there is this saying about Christians in a church: "If they would be really believing the good news of forgiveness in the New Testament, they should look much more happy than they do!".

But there are people who indeed are obviously happy and tell Jesus has helped them. This usually are the kind of people who are NOT coming over like these crazy shouting preachermen and joyless missionars.

Everyone is welcomed by God or his/her representants, may that be Jesus or others, that's the only logical belief for me. A main negative-powerful blockade is to feel guilty and unworthy. Don't fool yourself with this.

Btw, I'm not in a Christian community or any other religion. I just take what seems healthy and logical to me, and go with my own experiences, and search for further understanding and ways to enjoy life. You know, life can be pretty boring, that's why one has to be active in whatever form, just to find something of interest, to explore, to practise, to have something to looking forward to.

Spooky

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"I'm going where the pavement turns to sand"&&Neil Young, "Thrasher"

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DaBears

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #17 - May 5^th, 2007 at 12:34am

spooky2 wrote on May 4^th, 2007 at 10:09pm:

Yes, DaBears is right Sam. You know, to have a religion and being a member of a church has on many people a stabilizing function.

However, following strict rules without thinking and without personal experience, always fear included, is not going to make the people feel happy and free. In Germany, where I am, there is this saying about Christians in a church: "If they would be really believing the good news of forgiveness in the New Testament, they should look much more happy than they do!".

But there are people who indeed are obviously happy and tell Jesus has helped them. This usually are the kind of people who are NOT coming over like these crazy shouting preachermen and joyless missionars.

Everyone is welcomed by God or his/her representants, may that be Jesus or others, that's the only logical belief for me. A main negative-powerful blockade is to feel guilty and unworthy. Don't fool yourself with this.

Btw, I'm not in a Christian community or any other religion. I just take what seems healthy and logical to me, and go with my own experiences, and search for further understanding and ways to enjoy life. You know, life can be pretty boring, that's why one has to be active in whatever form, just to find something of interest, to explore, to practise, to have something to looking forward to.

Spooky

Great post Spooky! I am on the same page as you brother.. No real Religion interest me.. They are follow to many strict rules.. Plus, they are more fear-based than love-based..

peace

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Fetography

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #18 - Jun 7^th, 2007 at 10:39pm

I want to thank you guys for all of your support. Your insights are really, really, appreciated and I feel like I am beginning to understand. The road to healing my mental illnesses is going to be a hard one....especially because my OCD has evolved from something minor to major; however, if I can find God the journey will be much less painful.

You have all brought up very good points. What confuses me about going down the path of finding God inside myself rather than, lets say, the church is the lack of identity and rules. Things are so much easier when you're spoon fed the Bible and just say "whatever is in it is what I have to believe". Any questions, you just ask the preacher. Any need for support, you turn to the community. The problem is that those of us that just can't seem to believe in the mechanics of mainstream religion seem to be forced to be a team of two, just you and your beliefs. Thats what's hard, defining your own rules and not having a community to "have your back".

There is a lot of sadness in me that I can't just accept an identifiable religion. I realize though that joining one of those religions, from what i know about them, would not be for the right reasons. Joining a religion whose foundation I cannot agree with, just so that I can achieve a level of community and support, wouldn't work out for me.

Finding my own road and beliefs is much more loving and in a sense truthful. Where there are mass numbers of people, there is corruption; it's just how the game works. So, it's just hard for me to figure all of this out at such a young and turbulent age in my life.

Do any of you have stories about how you found God and your beliefs?
Where it all started for you and how you got to the point in your faith that you are today?

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dave_a_mbs

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #19 - Jun 8^th, 2007 at 4:46pm

Hi Sam-
Welcome!

You've got a lot of excellent advice. All I want to add is three ideas. First, having done three years of internship doing psych diagnoses for the state, I can assue you that psychiatric diagnosis is an imperfect art at very best. That means that you may discover that what you feel today will be changed tomorrow and might be diagnosed differently - whether because of new realiztions, changes, or simply growing through a lot of it. Remember to be YOU and not the label that someone has assigned you. That way things change, even if not very rapidly. YOU are not a "diagnostic label", YOU are not a "thing", YOU are not just a "body". You are the center of your universe - and that's a hint as to who your real identity actually is, so it's OK to let it develop, (Sri Ramana Maharshi used to call this the True Self.)

Second, when I was going through a spell of "what the hell is valid?" I discovered Earnest Holmes "Science of Mind". His book is essentially a study on discovering God by yourself, and using that awareness to heal yourself. It's not deep, simple language, and the little essays are just the right length for bathroom reading. As the ideas sort themselves out, you'll notice that you find a new direction in which to look etc. Just keep plodding along and you'll get there. As Lao Tse might have said, "The journey of a thousand li begins with but a single step."

Third - Have faith in yourself - even if you can't locate God, God is well aware of you and loves you unconditionally, it's rather as if you are a part of God, or an idea in the mind of God, or a manifestation of God - and the more effort you apply to come to God, God will multiply that by ten, a hundred or a thousand fold to come to you. You might be interested in poking about Vedanta and the story of Sri Ramakrishna and some of those guys in that respect.

PUL
dave

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identcat

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #20 - Jun 8^th, 2007 at 6:30pm

First: try looking into Eckankar for a different view on religion. Very spiritual

http://www.eckankar.org

Second: contact the Monroe Institute to obtain Hemi-sync music for your mental health.
http://www.monroeinstitute.com/

Call TMI (the Monroe Institute) and talk to one of the consolers. There are many doctors who will verify that the meditation music--- hemi-sync--- has benefits for the brain.

Wishing you wellness.

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The three things you can never take back:
The spoken word.
The unkind thought.
The misused hour.

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Lekatt

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #21 - Jun 9^th, 2007 at 8:39am

Fetography wrote on Jun 7^th, 2007 at 10:39pm:

I want to thank you guys for all of your support. Your insights are really, really, appreciated and I feel like I am beginning to understand. The road to healing my mental illnesses is going to be a hard one....especially because my OCD has evolved from something minor to major; however, if I can find God the journey will be much less painful.

You have all brought up very good points. What confuses me about going down the path of finding God inside myself rather than, lets say, the church is the lack of identity and rules. Things are so much easier when you're spoon fed the Bible and just say "whatever is in it is what I have to believe". Any questions, you just ask the preacher. Any need for support, you turn to the community. The problem is that those of us that just can't seem to believe in the mechanics of mainstream religion seem to be forced to be a team of two, just you and your beliefs. Thats what's hard, defining your own rules and not having a community to "have your back".

There is a lot of sadness in me that I can't just accept an identifiable religion. I realize though that joining one of those religions, from what i know about them, would not be for the right reasons. Joining a religion whose foundation I cannot agree with, just so that I can achieve a level of community and support, wouldn't work out for me.

Finding my own road and beliefs is much more loving and in a sense truthful. Where there are mass numbers of people, there is corruption; it's just how the game works. So, it's just hard for me to figure all of this out at such a young and turbulent age in my life.

Do any of you have stories about how you found God and your beliefs?
Where it all started for you and how you got to the point in your faith that you are today?

I did a lot of searching before my near death experience. There are some churches out there where I think you might be comfortable. One of them is Unity Church, another is Unitarian, there are also some Spiritual churches. I know it is easier to learn if you have the support of a group of people. I went to many different churches looking, but finally found a spiritual group that met at a person's house. That was the best. The lady who ran it was a psychic. You might consider reading some near death experiences, they can be a big help. Love

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"Everything can be taken away from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way" ~ Viktor Frankl

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Ra.

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Re: Trying to stay afloat.
Reply #22 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 6:19pm

Call TMI (the Monroe Institute) and talk to one of the consolers. There are many doctors who will verify that the meditation music--- hemi-sync--- has benefits for the brain.

Wishing you wellness.

Don't use Hemi-sync it is grossly overpriced and the neuro-logic works much better (customize your own)

It kinda angers me when people ask other people what religion they should follow.
It is stupid. Do research and answer your own questions. Do you underestimate your intelligence?

Btw Religion is bullshit. I don't care what anyone says about the stability it offers, (to weak minded people) it is still archaic and the equivalent of believing in Zeus and the pantheon of the gods.

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Spiritualism is the acceptance of empirically elicited evidence that the human consciousness survives physical death and that those who survive can communicate with those who are physically on earth in a number of ways.

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hawkeye Super Member Offline Afterlife Knowledge Member Posts: 886 canada Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #23 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 6:33pm You know Ra, Hemi-sync is far from over priced as fer as I am concerned. The few thousand dollars that I have spent have more than worth it. Just what is the price of spiritual fulfillment? Anybody know the price? (Not that Hemi-sync offers it.)
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Ra. New Member Offline Posts: 42 Montclair, New Jersey Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #24 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 6:53pm hemi-sync was created using neuro-logic technology.
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hawkeye Super Member Offline Afterlife Knowledge Member Posts: 886 canada Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #25 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 7:07pm Ra, Where can I find out more of this "neuro-logic" tech you speek of? I would love to take a look.
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Ra. New Member Offline Posts: 42 Montclair, New Jersey Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #26 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 7:14pm http://www.transparentcorp.com/ It is actually called neuro-programmer lol
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Ra. New Member Offline Posts: 42 Montclair, New Jersey Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #27 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 7:16pm Hey could you please help me out http://gouki.imeem.com/playlist/jEMZEYsK/ that is the link to a playlist I made. could you give me some positive remarks I would greatly appreciate it
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Ra. New Member Offline Posts: 42 Montclair, New Jersey Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #28 - Jun 11^th, 2007 at 7:17pm Probally won't be your type of music but help me out
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hawkeye Super Member Offline Afterlife Knowledge Member Posts: 886 canada Gender:	Re: Trying to stay afloat. Reply #29 - Jun 12^th, 2007 at 11:57am Thank so much Ra. I will take a good look around the site.
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