B-man,
Consider the consensus of astral explorers and NDEs about one of the "nearest" astral layers to the earth variously known as Sheol, Focus 24, etc. This layer is inhabited not only by earthbound spirits and lost balls in the tall weeds, but also by spirits who, frankly, seem insane. Now consider all those defiant elderly souls who have no interest in God, Jesus, or progress towards PUL. A good percentage of these die in pathetic senility. Their major pleasure is a good bowel movement and their greatly eroded memory is clearest about their youth. B-man, there is a good chance that this will eventually be your fate.

And since you were so "spiritual" and goodie-two-shoes in your younger years, that is the phase that your memory will preserve.
Now, B-man, ask yourself why the afterlife "system" leaves these pathetic souls to their insane ravings and lost confusion. Perhaps, they lacked the noble core desires that might allow them to be retrieved and made sane to pursue their intense and loving goals. Think about it, B-man. These guys wanted and expected extinction like you, but instead they get stuck in drooling insanity--like our most incoherent dreams that make no sense. These insane souls, too, congregate on the basis of like attracts like, B-man. If I were you, I'd actually read a book on the afterlife--any book--and get yourself some core desires that might get you out of this mess.
Don
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Well, Don - if you're right, then I'm f***ed, I guess.
I'd rather stick my you-know-what into a meat grinder and
hit "puree" than become a churchy, preachy, suit-and-tie
get-a-life faithhead.
I'd rather eat nematode-infested human feces, than get up
early on Sunday to go to (UGH) church. (And I suppose you'd
say it's a noble thing to pony up my hard-earned cash to
waste on maintaining Mr. Pulpit Lizard's lifestyle when his collection
plate gets passes around? Parasitic bastard...)
Sorry, but I'm not sacrificing what I DO have -
THIS life - in order to pursue rewards which have BLIND
FAITH, as their only evidence.
Guess I'd better start saving up for that cryonics option..!
B-man