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Gateway Experience Journals!!! (Read 74536 times)
I Am Dude
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #105 - Jan 4th, 2007 at 2:58pm
 
JOURNAL ENTRY 31

Last night I listened to Wave 7, part 4, which assists you into meeting and working with guides.  Some things happened that I find it hard to explain.  Ok here we go..

I began listening at about 3:15 am.  I clicked out of the experience probably 10 minutes into it.  I figure this because I don't recall hearing any of the exercise dialouge after a certain point, I barely got passed getting into focus 12 before the clickout.  So I regain consiousness with a strange feeling.. a feeling like I was just with someone or somthing, I felt like I was just brought back by whoever this was.  Here comes the part that I don't get, the part that scares me a little.  This particular exercise was about 35 minutes long.  I regained consciousness at the very end of this exercise.  So I looked at the clock, and it is almost 5 am.  At the time I did not make the connection that there was about an hour of missing time, of almost impossibly missed time.  Just thinking about this gives me butterflies.  But I have to accept it, for it happened.

So I'm dreaming, and I gain a little bit of lucidity.  I am thinking some things, and it seems like my thoughts are distorted and skewed out by some outside force.  After a few moments of this weird feeling, I feel an energetic presence touch my arm and heard a noise, I forget what the noise was but that combined with the touch make me wake up.  It gets weirder.  It was about 9 am when I woke up.  I look out my window, and I see somthing and I didnt, and still dont, know what it was.  It was a little cloudy outside, but at this one point in the sky there were a lot of clouds, but there was an opening in the center of the clouds, and there was a light, not extremely bright but not too dim either, and this light was shining through the clouds.  But it was not the sun, for I could see the sun, and it definately was not the moon.  It was a separate light, a sphere of light I could see through the opening in the clouds.  I was a little freaked out, but also a little bit amazed.

This morning and even right now, for no reason at all I have had a couple of moments where I would feel the sense of doom.  Like being very scared, of something I consciously am not aware of.  After reviewing the events, I don't know what to think.  Part of me says, whatever happened, it probably had something to do with guides that I may have met unconsciously during my click out or somthing related to that.  But theres this other part of me that says, how could I have this missing time, this feeling that I am not conscious of its source, and these strange happenings all in one night.  Some part of me believes it may have something to do with somthing nonhuman.  Perhaps ETs.  The truth is, I have been unimaginably afraid of aliens every since I was a little kid, for absolutely no reason at all.  Just looking at a picture of them would cause the most intense fear ever, and I cant not overlook the fact that many people who have had experiences with abductions and such have had a fear as intense as mine at the thought of these beings, even though they do not did not know why at the time.  I cant over look the fact that growing up, I have always had a feeling of a presense nearby before falling asleep.  I cant overlook the fact that on a few occasions I have gained consiousness to find myself looking up with numerous beings around my bed, the same beings that have caused such fear in my heart for reasons I do not know.  And I also cant over look the fact that I am becoming a new person, most of my old fears have been dissolved, and the ones that are not totally gone are in the process, are getting smaller and smaller as the days go by.  I believe I have been seeking contact with these beings, unconsciously, and even a little bit consciously.  My interest in them has increased 10 fold over the past month or so, and the fear I have for them is nowhere near as strong as it used to be.  Part of me thinks that there is a chance I have had ET experiences  more than once, and the more open I become and the more I accept it, the more I will be conscious of them.  

But who knows, maybe Im just loosing my mind!


EDIT: A few minutes after typing this entry, I remembered a dream I had last night that was quite disturbing.  I woke up in my bed, and had a huge, red bump on the side of my neck with a decent sized hole in it, with some gooey stuff oozing out.  Just as I saw this thing on my neck, a memory came to me of an alien sticking me with some kind of long needle.  I knew that I had been abducted.  I dont remember anything that happened after this. 

So on top of all these weird experiences that happened in reality, not in a dream, I have a dream that connects the experiences directly to what I think may have happened.  Now realise I came to the (possible) conclusion about the aliens today, right before I wrote my journal entry.  I had not been consumed with the idea of aliens last night, even after I noticed the missing time I did not think anything of it, these conclusions are strictly based on the experiences I had.  I know somthing is going on.  I have to figure it out.
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Rob Calkins
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #106 - Jan 4th, 2007 at 4:22pm
 
You’re not loosing your mind.  You’re making progress.  Your old fears are dissolving and shrinking.  That’s usually a longer on-going process.  It’s remarkable that you’ve gone so far and so fast. 

As for your clicking out, I imagine the loss of time can be jolting.  It’s happened to me with one of the hemi-synch tapes (don’t have the Gateway series).  Didn’t shake me though – I was too amazed that it happened to be shaken.  My assumption is that something definitely is going on when that happens but we just aren’t able to register it in our physically oriented conscious minds.

In your post you mentioned Waves and Parts.  I’ve been wanting to ask you what a Wave is – does it correlate to the focus levels or does it just represent different aspects of the Gateway program?

I appreciate your journal.  I really need to sign up for the program at TMI.  I think there are too many distractions for me to use the CD series.  You amaze me by being able to go through the different parts when the phone’s ringing or people are talking and the other distractions you’ve mentioned.  Keep it up.  Thanks. - Rob
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #107 - Jan 4th, 2007 at 6:06pm
 
ditto for me what Rob said.  I'm amazed you've stuck with it this long. and look at the size of your journal here!

couple of things I note: from reading Bruce's books he tells of greeting others "out there" directing them to something, to somewhere. he notices theres is a blinking out process. some of his participants seem more awake than others that they are there. others kind of walk on by oblivious to their surroundings. these may be like our astral bodies, which are said to float around during our sleep while some of us are awake enough to attend a classroom, etc.
blinking out seems to be rather commonplace is what I'm trying to say. for think about it, that in order to not blink out, you would have to set an intention that you are going to maintain wafefulness throughout.

many people are working on this very thing. having lucidity within a dream is similar. we are given all kinds of exercises to awaken within a dream. I think it has something to do with the electrical impulses within the brain...and that the interpretative fuction of the mind is perceiving something it does not know how to translate and send back to the brain, the holding center of consciousness in C1.
therefore blinking out is natural. you have no data base built in. not yet.
yet you recall the needle in the neck. thats a symbol of what really happened.
the symbol is the brains way of attempting to interpret what really happened, it offers you the nearest symbolic reference point.

If you read William Gammil's account, in the book The Gathering, I think it would set any fears you have to rest concerning aliens.
You may be working with them, but not fully aware yet.
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I Am Dude
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #108 - Jan 4th, 2007 at 6:35pm
 
Don't think that I was suprised at the fact that I clicked out... I click out all the time, probably twice a week.  The thing that doesn't make sense is that when I regained consciousness, the ipod was thirty minutes into the track.  However, almost two hours went by in real time.  It is as if time froze for an hour and a half, for both my time and the ipod's time.  Just think about it... imagine going to sleep at 3 am wearing a watch alarm and you set it to go off in half an hour.  The watch alarm goes off, but when you look at the time on another clock it is 5 am.  Thats an hour and a half that is totally unaccounted for, as if your time and the watches time was frozen.  This is what the mystery is.  How can a half an hour track take 2 hours to play? It cant. My ipod isnt defective, and neither are the tracks.  Something caused time to freeze for an hour and a half.  That I am sure of.
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LaffingRain
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #109 - Jan 4th, 2007 at 7:19pm
 
maybe...your astral body somehow manipulated the Ipod? so that it would bring to your attention that you're actually working this area? 
I can't think of a technical reason as the tape should have stopped after 30 minutes right?

I have heard of people being able to effect electronics, and the spirits have turned light switches on and off..
my sister had a ghost that turned the TV on all the time..these are electrical powers being manipulated to catch your attention.  I would assume you also have guides around who are not revealing their presence until the right time.
I just assume that because I've had guides the same, but they work with me thru the dream state as thats where I expect to get help with questions.

I've heard of folks having a type of magnetism in their energy field, they can manipulate all kinds of phenonmenon. watches won't work on them.

one time there was a show on the radio, Art Bell or the other guy, George. they asked all the audience to get out their broken watches. they were going to get them running again. a very large percentage called in that it worked now.

the power of the collective mind. in your case, its a little different, like the Ipod rewound itself? started over?

ooooouuuuuu! Smiley  love it.
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I Am Dude
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #110 - Jan 4th, 2007 at 10:04pm
 
That is a good assumption.  However, it is very hard to come to terms with the fact that I somehow made it "pause" myself.  But this may very well be the case.  Another thing I was thinking was that possibly I was somehow brought to a place outside of time, and upon returning this seemingly impossible situation occured.  I would love to know the truth.
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #111 - Jan 5th, 2007 at 6:48pm
 
When I read: "I regained consciousness at the very end of this exercise," I just assumed that you regained consciousness "after" the end of the exercise.  I didn't appreciate that the i-pod was still going.  When I read you were a little scared, I should have gone back and read what you wrote more carefully.  Given some of your experiences and dreams, the term "scared" really doesn't apply to you very well.

Wow!  That is one amazing experience.  Some possible explanations come to mind but none of them seem to account for what happened very well.  As usual, I'm looking forward to what happens next.

Rob
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I Am Dude
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #112 - Jan 5th, 2007 at 8:40pm
 
Update on the aliens:(lol)

I had a dream last night in which an alien inserted an object into my skull.  My left eyeball was taken out (ouch!), and my viewpoint was from the inside of my head.  I saw an alien reach in and stick somthing in my head.  Also, I shared my experience with members of an alien abduction forum, and they seem to believe that I may have had a genuine abduction experience.  But I am not sure about all of that.  I'm not drawing any conclusions yet, just taking it a day at a time until I have enough clues to formulate a logical explanation.  I just hope I dont wake up with an anal probe!
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #113 - Jan 5th, 2007 at 11:29pm
 
I Am Dude wrote on Jan 5th, 2007 at 8:40pm:
Update on the aliens:(lol)

I had a dream last night in which an alien inserted an object into my skull.  My left eyeball was taken out (ouch!), and my viewpoint was from the inside of my head.  I saw an alien reach in and stick somthing in my head.  Also, I shared my experience with members of an alien abduction forum, and they seem to believe that I may have had a genuine abduction experience.  But I am not sure about all of that.  I'm not drawing any conclusions yet, just taking it a day at a time until I have enough clues to formulate a logical explanation.  I just hope I dont wake up with an anal probe!


;D

  Anyways...  OOBD, have you read any of Rosalind McKnight's stuff?  I highly recommend both her books, but especially her first one called Cosmic Journeys which talks quite a bit about E.T.'s. 

   She was shown the probable futures for humanity from her time up until the year 3000 or so, and she saw that at around 2500 or so, it was probable that we would get into a brief war with some not so positive E.T.'s. 

   In other parts of the book, her guides talk to her about these not so positive E.T.'s, and basically they relayed that they don't have the best of intentions, and they, like the much more spiritually advanced ones, have been abducting and implanting folks for centuries.  The friendly and very positive E.T.'s however keep a close watch on them and their activities, and they will use the implants from these not so friendly E.T's for positive purposes of communication.   

  I've had dreams about both groups, as has my life partner too. 

   Anyways, from what her and her guides indicated, this war of 2500 is not going to be that big of a deal, if it happens, since we will have help and similar technology as the not so light filled E.T.'s.   

   I was kind of hoping that Bruce's work with the E.T's who had no heart awareness (possibly the "grays"?), might change this probable future, but i have no idea, haven't been given info on this.   What i do know, is that there are still some rather dark beings out there who are attracted to humans and to Earth because of the Law of like attracts and begets like.   

   Nothing to worry about though, i don't think, we are ultimately protected i believe and positivity/love energy is all we need to be safe anyways, cause ultimately nothing can harm the real us,  at least imo.

  Anyways, if you haven't already read her books, i think you would quite enjoy them.   Much of the material in Rosie's first book comes directly from the explorer sessions at the Monroe Institute (not called that then) with Bob Monroe.     In fact, part of my tag here is taken from this book, cause Rosie has a guide whom Bob and her called "Ah So", since he gently refused to give out a name (not wanting to tie himself in too much with the Earth again), but he had a slight asian accent so they just decided to call him Ah So ;D. 

  All the best
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I Am Dude
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #114 - Jan 6th, 2007 at 8:37pm
 
I am reposting this on my Gateway Experience thread because I feel it is an important step in my spiritual progress, and do not want it to get lost at the bottom of the forum pages. 

This morning I became lucid during a dream, so I decided to have an OBE instead.  This led to a series of OBEs, Id say I had at least three in a row.  But the last one was somthing special, and I'd like to share it with everyone and see what you guys think.

I was still in my body, but my energy body was very loose.  I called out for a guide, and felt a small hand in mine.  It pulled me up and out, and I was facing a small boy, probably about eight years old.  I just knew that this boy was special to me, so close to me, I could not resist giving him a big hug.  I was talking to him, and although I can not remember the exact dialogue, I know what was discussed and what answers I got.  After communication, I discovered that this boy was actually me, when I was his age.  Somthing happened that caused him separate from me.  I cannot remember the incident or incidents that caused this, I just know that he was me, he is me, a part of me that was previously lost.  He then presented me with a box.  In this box were some objects.  They may have been books, but I only glanced in the box so I am not completely sure.  But I understood that these items inside the box represented this boy, and I knew I needed to read or examine everything in that box so this boy could be a part of me once again.   

At this time, I noticed that I was with another boy as well.  My awareness of the first boy became faint, but this new boy began talking to me.  He was worried, because the thought that if I were to unite with the boy who pulled me out, either he would not exist anymore, or I would not be able to be with him anymore.  However, I knew that this was not the case, although I was not completely sure who this new boy was, I also knew that he was special and close to me in some way.  I hugged him, and told him that nothing bad would happen, that everything was for the best and we would always be together.  It was very emotional.  So I looked into the box, and all of the items were gone!  Just then, I knew that whatever it was that needed to be done, I had done it at that point.  I felt that I did not need those items to unite once again with that little boy, but it already occurred, possibly simply by the act of comforting the other boy and accepting what had to be done.  It was very emotional for me, I felt such extreme joy it was indescribable.

Here is my analysis of the events which occured.  I believe that an aspect of myself which I had given up, lost, when I was a little kid, came to me and for some reason it was time to reunite with him.  I believe that the second boy who came was possibly my old self, after the initial separation from the aspect which was lost.  He was what was left of me after the one aspect was lost.  I beleive that he was afraid that if I was to join with the old aspect of myself, he would not exist anymore, for he is what I became when the aspect left, and he thought that with the return of this aspect brought about the demise of himself.
I allowed him to see that this was not the case, so he did not fear the reunion, and it was able to take place.   

Any further thoughts would be appreciated.  This seemed monumental to me, I really do believe something amazing happened.
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #115 - Jan 7th, 2007 at 2:37am
 
These are called self retrievals Dude and I felt much the same way to do a few of them. Especially a kid about 3 yrs old. the joy of reunion is like your daily energy level increases.

hard to explain but I think you have done a good job with the words. I don't think the general public is doing self retrievals but I'm sure it's a part of the TMI program to teach it.
I picked it up from reading Bruce's books and Monroe's. Never been to TMI but read alot about those who have gone there and my stories are similar so I know anybody can do them if they put their mind to it.

what I think happens is, (can only speak personally) a piece of me, like energy, like a self image stuck in time, stuck on the surface of this movie I call my life, broke off due to the inability of my mind to accept..well, my family had moved from a house and left me alone in the house and so I thought I might die.
my mind could not accept this had happened and so I forgot. I forgot because it was unacceptable to remember. and painful.
when I found her sitting there I went through the motions of retrieving her then gradually the memory would resurface and I would accept it had happened and then is where the energy gain would occur in the physical/emotional vehicles.

you know it's like dancing down the sunny side of the street after such a retrieval.

see if you do not begin to experience greater equalibrium from now on out.
thank you for sharing, too many of us don't share their personal stories and I do so like to hear them when I can, as I believe self retrievals and retrievals of each other is going to be the new wave of the future and we get to be in the front.
guess how my guides got me to do that retrieval? they tricked me. I was going to retrieve someone else. they brought me to myself. it was just what I needed. it makes u wonder if there's more pieces of self to gather? maybe if we all retrieved our pieces we would have something to celebrate for a long long time.
thanks again, if you weren't here, I just don't know what I'd have to talk about!
love, alysia


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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #116 - Jan 8th, 2007 at 11:32am
 
I think you did a good job of interpreting your experience.  I’ve read about people splitting off fragments or aspects of themselves.  I’m not sure I understand it but it’s interesting, especially when we view ourselves as entities of consciousness. 

One alternate possibility I’d like to toss out is that the young boy might not have been an aspect of you when you were younger.  It could also be an aspect of you now that has not been allowed to develop or grow up – hence it appears as a young person.  I don't think it makes much difference to your interpretation.

In both cases you’ve taken steps to integrate that aspect back into your primary personality.  Like LightR, I wonder if you will notice any other changes going on that correlate to this experience.  One area I’m curious about is whether there will be a reduction in the dreams you’ve had about being chased and fighting back defending yourself – that might be totally unrelated but then again there might be some connection.
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #117 - Jan 12th, 2007 at 2:35pm
 
JOURNAL ENTRY 32

I've been going to bed way too late lately.. I always fall asleep during the exercises.  I woke up this morning and decided to have a listen.  I fell aleep AGAIN!  I woke up when the exercise was over.  I decided that I don't need hemisync, took off the headphones and affirmed that I was going to leave my body.  Sure enough, I was able to lift out.  The past few times I've had OBEs, I have noticed that I have not gotten the intense vibrations that I used to get right before separation.  Maybe you don't need these vibrations as you become more advanced?

I was unable to see for a few moments.  I gained sight and floated out of my roof into the sky.  I was way up, in a place I am not familiar with.  I decided to ask for Jesus to come to me.  I stated my intent over and over, yelling it at the top of my lungs even.  After nothing happened, I called out for a guide.  I noticed someone walking in the street below, so I decided to investigate.  It was an older woman.  I walked (floated) with her, talking to her.  She was very nice and kind.  She seemed to have told me somthing, perhaps some kind of lesson.  I remember her saying, "you shouldn't do ... something... because... something."  I cannot recall the details of what she said, but I had a feeling that what she was saying was true to me, that she knew me on a deep level somehow.  I left her and went flying around.  I was not familiar with my surroundings.  It seemed to have been in some kind of urban city area.

I found myself back in my body, but floated out easily once again.  This time I found myself up in the sky, looking down upon a farm type place.  There was a small house with people outside of it, possibly BBQing?  There was a vast plane of grass and possibly some crops, the boarder of the area was forest.  I have a faint recollection of going down to the people.  I recall seeing some of them up close.  The next thing I remember is spinning around very fast.  I did this just to experiment, usually doing this projects me to a new frequency level. Perhaps it increases my own vibrations?  So after spinning, I saw white light come down, and I opened my eyes.  What I saw is very hard to explain.  It looked like a painting with the paint moving.  There were many oranges and reds, in motion.  This was what I recall the background of this place to be.  I noticed some abstract figures, they seemed like sculptures.  One was tall, pointy and green.  It is so hard to explain what I saw or where I was.  It was as if some of the things from the scene I was previously in(the BBQ) had stayed, but were skewed and much different.  The place almost reminded me of a hell-type place.  The colors of the area were very similar to depictions of a typical hell, the oranges and reds.  I was only in this place for a few moments.  It was as disturbing as it was amazing.      
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #118 - Jan 12th, 2007 at 8:51pm
 
good one Dude. I don't see colors much, so nice gift you're developing. we should study what colors mean more. I have a book on thought form colors, sounds like an atmospheric color, you know, like a small town is? sometimes I go into small towns and all I see is clone attitude people, in the way that its in the general atmosphere. probably a bst.

the vibrations I do believe are an initiatory process to gain your own attention of spinning chakras for lift off of awareness. used to have them from the 60's thru the 80's but not anymore. kinda miss the sensation, was really quite a joyful buzz back then. part of the vibrations could contain a mild fear euphoria, the awareness of becoming free from constraints of body might be part of the vibrations. fear is the opposite of PUL, or closest analogy. fear on this planet is also very tantalizing feeling all the way to terror.

theres nothing to fear however, we learn to manipulate fear and I think PUl manipulates us, if that makes sense. Smiley I'm not saying you are fearful. I'm just studying human emotions, emotions are energies in the astral body. never could figure out why those vibrations used to get me so excited I'd pop me cork but never go anywhere!

about 80% of my obes were involuntary from the subconscious area. you are in advance of me to work consciously, objectively, which is what Monroe was working on. and Bruce too.

going to sleep? I could sleep anywhere anytime, takes me 2 seconds to nodd off. woke up this morning with a message...I remember thinking wow! thanks for that message, it makes soooooo much sense! went back to sleep. woke up...oh jesus, what was that message? I should have had my tape recorder near.

I don't think u will see any guides dressed up for you as J. you don't really believe or want that (guessing)  relax, he's used to the flack. it was always my supposition he only comes (or sends a right hand man lookalike) when theres an urgency for contact or a intense longing for that particular contact.
He's probably thinking, oh look at Dude! he's wondering about me...better keep an eye on that guy..just never know where he's gonna end up next!
regardless of the public image of the man, he did have a sense of humor, and he was very human in the most loving type of way. I've meditated on him now and again. I'm sure he loves our sense of adventure on this planet, or we have helpers slightly more advanced helping us astral project what not.  you already know there's more than one Jesus type person out there; thats good news huh? I'd hate to think theres only one way, my way or the highway....geez...how awful.

I hope u keep posting about these projections, but I know all good things do end, we seem to go in cycles and you're on a roll right now!

...
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Re: Gateway Experience Journals!!!
Reply #119 - Jan 16th, 2007 at 3:48pm
 
JOURNAL ENTRY 33

Last night I listened to Wave 7 part 5, which is a Focus 21 excersize.  During the count up to 21, I began to feel like I was no longer laying on my bed, but floating in space.  My state of mind was quite different than normal as well.  The next thing I know I became conscious and the track was concluding.  Darn clickouts.

This morning I woke up and put on the same track.  About ten minutes into it I felt as if I was free.  I slowly flew off my bed.  Once again, I skipped over the intense vibrations that are a common signpost of OBEs.  I am convinced that I simply do not need this vibrational state anymore.  I believe that Monroe eventually did not experience the vibrations after a while either.

So I flew up into the sky.  It was dark outside, so I was obviously in a lower astral level.  My surroundings were extremely different.  There was a large building amoung many houses, and the entire area was surrounded by mountains.  I flew about a mile and reached a house.  I do not know why I went to this particular house, it just felt like the thing to do.  When I arrived there, something made me do a reality check.  I felt my face with my hands, and was shocked when my awareness skyrocketed.  I felt my hands on my face, and felt my face on my hands as if I were in waking consciousness.  Simultaneously my awareness became much higher. 

There was someone in this house.  Or somthing.  The details are not clear in my mind, but what I remember is seeing somthing there, and somehow letting it out of the house.  I get a strange feeling when I try to remember this part.

I decided to leave the house.  Things were seeming too real, and I actually thought that I may end up stuck permanently in this place if I did not leave.  I jumped and flew out of the house and into the dark sky.  I flew back to my house.  I have no idea how I knew which house was mine, because I was totally unfamiliar with the entire city.  I came to a house that was totally different from mine, actually it was totally different from any house I have ever seen.  It was even too abstract to describe it right now, no words can accurately describe what it looked like.  There was one very interesting thing about it.  On the outside of the house where my room was, I saw a sign.  It said, "Afterlife Knowledge."  I was amazed.  I wondered, why does it say this?  I floated back into my room and into my body.  This is the first time I actually went back into my body on my own, I am usually slung back into it.  Maybe I did so because the track was saying to come back to waking consciousness?

I was back in my body, but I again felt the ability to slip out easily.  I began to wonder off from my body once again, but I thought that maybe if I had another journey, I would forget my first one.  So I woke up and wrote down the experience. 

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But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you.
 
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