(A hard subject to a non native English speaker, excuse me in advance please)

Allan Kardec conclusions on the subject:

The human spirit whether incarnated or not can communicate to others always it can “tune” with the “target”.  

Usually what happens is kind of a thought exchange. When incarnated the phenomenon is felt as an intuition otherwise among discarnated spirits it is clearer and direct.

Both the “good” and the “not good yet” spirits can influence us once tuned with us.

What is called possession? To understand it we need first to understand the mechanism of the spiritual influence.

Spirits are all over around (we’re spirits) and not all of then can influence us, why?

It’s because the process is based in transmitting an idea to a person in a way that the person tends to agree and act according to the transmitted idea hence it’s necessary to find a basis at the “target” mind.

So if I’m a very aggressive spirit and my goal is to convince someone to spank a person I hate at the physical I’ll need to find a person who believes that violence is a possible way to solve a problem, if not, my target could simple deny the suggestion because it doesn’t fits His/Her thoughts.

So spiritual influence is when we receive and ACCEPT an idea that a spirit sent us because it resonates at our mind even in a very deep level almost unconscious. This is why Allan Kardec states that we own our minds. The main problem is that we not always really know ourselves.

Possession is when this thought exchange with acceptance between sender and receiver become permanent and dangerous that after some time they become so bonded that is quite impossible to know which act comes from the incarnated person and which one does not.

Some instruments used by low level spirits in order to influence us are our guilt feelings, and any bad felling they could manage to find at us.

Hence the solution can come from psychological help, and medications along with a gathering of spiritual knowledge.

Psychology: Work with the guilt and fear
Medicine: Can change the brain chemical balance in order to difficult the tuning process.
Spiritual Knowledge: Will allow the change at our behavior in order to eliminate de traits of our personality which had opened the doors to the possession process.

Usually after a successful “anti possessive healing” booth the spirit (possessor) and the person (possessed) get to a clearer understanding of live and become more lucid minds.  

Caryn:

It is interesting that you bring up the subject of sex. I'm not a prude, but I do believe that lust and love are two different things. The only thing the energy of lust cares about is self fulfillment. It does seem to be on the same level as our lower nature urges.

Because my kundalini is awake I have to take special care. My guidance has been sending me messages which suggest that I need to get over my sexual attachments, so that my development moves towards Christ consciousness.  Not to say that I'm a sex maniac; however, I realize that my energy and openess to Christ consciousness is partly blocked by the sexual attachments I have.