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I thought he was evil..but.. (Read 4296 times)
LaffingRain
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I thought he was evil..but..
Dec 11th, 2005 at 9:44pm
 
He wasn't evil. I found his soul. this hardly ever happens on the earth plane, well, I'm sure it does, and maybe somebody here will tell us their story, but generally this is like a skelton in the closet story. we really need to start thinking about children though if we want a new world. I believe so much in divine  intercession operating here. I call the intercession Dead Preacher or DP, my guide, as it helps me understand the part of me, alysia, that is at one with DP, my guide. nobody likes to think they are two people; it's confusing, so I accepted that channelling is a way to express the oneness of all humanity aside from petty little personality/belief system differences which conceal that we are as mini gods here.

this man I talk of, he would be roadsign two of my book. some kind of miracle happened and can only call it PUL, which if u ever feel it, its more than an emotion and changes your life immediately. I call it undistorted love energy or ULE. it is the stuff makes u get out of bed in the morning with happiness instead of dread or pessimism.
I did not know he was not my blood father until age 30, when I heaved a sigh of relief to learn so; for he had molested me on 3 occassions, the last time at age 10. at age 14, I had nowhere to live, so I stayed under his roof until 17, and that is when I discovered, with DP's help, the man was not evil, and was redeemable.

think of it...what is the worst evil in the world? it would be to me to rape a child..for that is a lustful avarice, or a greed even. yes, we come to earth to learn control of appetite, to learn how not to steal as well, to covet, it would also be our understanding here that stealing stems from fear. fear that relief or pleasure can only be found by stealing or raping from another who is helpless before you.
think of what the greatest spiritual test would be here for a person to go thru. it would to forgive the rapist, to forive the thief or even the one who murders your child.
well, this is what happened when I was assisted by DP, and this story shows man can evolve here despite what appearances say the opposite.
briefly I was flooded with a spirit which told me to place my judgment aside for the moment, to find was there any good in this man whatsoever?  at first the man was afraid of me for healing energy poured thru me from DP,  I looked deep into his eyes and found only that when I ceased to have enmity for him, there was only love between us, and the past did not matter. forgiveness had just happened on a very high level. for the first time he noticed a person was inside me, a young girl who deserved respect, and from that moment on the entire relationship changed in the twinkling of an eye. no way could I have been alone in this miracle; not if you'd known his raw energy and his hatred of all the female sex, and also he was not above hitting women.
we should have hope for our criminals..we should look deeply into their eyes..when fear is gone, only love remains...only this matters in the end..that you take each and every relationship of long or short duration into the inner planes, even into death with you..not your cars, your houses, your careers, your jewels, your insurance plans, none of that matters in the least after death..only that you loved and you forgave and you gave of yourself this way so that there was joy then, there was freedom from the need to hurt another in any way. and now he walked in honor out of this life..I saw that happen..and i saw he would be reborn..and this time, he knew more about love, he would not have a sexual problem the next time..and DP said I could take credit for it!
it was a miracle..but since reading ACIM I learned I could have miracles anytime I'm ready for one! so go for it guys....go for the miracle..and when u get out of bed in the morn..u will arise with a smile on your face and you'll wonder how it got there...then you'll understand about PUL, that only this matters and nothing else. theres no need to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders when we have such capacity to heal one another. this is what you are when u find your fullness ...  every one of you has one of these on your shoulder, a divine spark, a Christed self that knocks at the door, that is DP's language and he's somethin' else. I've learned to respect him.
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Rob_Roy
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #1 - Dec 11th, 2005 at 10:22pm
 
That was great and oh so true. Thanks for a needed reminder.

with Love,
Bob
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spooky2
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #2 - Dec 13th, 2005 at 9:06pm
 
Yes Alysia, a very deep, well heroic (hmm, words!) moment for you, and for some readers I think too.

I once saw in the TV a survivor of the holocaust. During the legal proceedings against one of the brutal guards in the concentration camp of whom she was a victim of, she was asked if she would hate him. She said "No. I do not. Well I haven't forgotten. But I do not hate anymore. That would only harm me again and again, so I don't." I found it such impressing. And it's sounding such simple.

There was not spoken of love, so to forgive and to get love involved in a relationship where one was a victim of the other is a further step. But if one (me for instance) cannot make the big step, one has to make some little steps.

Congratulations Alysia!
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"I'm going where the pavement turns to sand"&&Neil Young, "Thrasher"
 
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blink
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #3 - Dec 13th, 2005 at 9:35pm
 
Alysia,
     You said:
..."when fear is gone, only love remains...only this matters in the end..that you take each and every relationship of long or short duration into the inner planes, even into death with you..not your cars, your houses, your careers, your jewels, your insurance plans, none of that matters in the least after death..only that you loved and you forgave and you gave of yourself this way so that there was joy then, there was freedom from the need to hurt another in any way."

This is so profound and so true, Alysia.  Nothing gives me more light, more freedom, than detaching from self imposed limitations on my own experiences of love and grace.  

But sometimes it helps so much to have this experience with another human being, the one who might have "harmed" me.  
Releasing fears and seeking out new ways to embrace love allows each of us to float like balloons over the landscapes of our lives.

with love, blink
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« Last Edit: Dec 14th, 2005 at 10:31am by N/A »  
 
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LaffingRain
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #4 - Dec 14th, 2005 at 12:39am
 
hi there Blink..been thinkin' bout cha.
glad some here got something out of my story..there was a time I was so ashamed still, I could not tell it. I had this profound dream (for me) and it told me to stop hiding the little girl in the public bathroom..she just wanted to come with me. and thanks Spooky; I knew you had ears for me and could sense the deep peace there.

lately, I think about how each soul comes to this plane to have whatever intention. each one different. some don't know what. might take a whole lifetime to find out, and then some never do, so they want to try again. might just be a type of energy they bring with them for the soup pot.
about self imposed limitations or intentions or our energy signatures...
I remember I was around 10 when I saw an older student pushing around a younger student and yelling, being abusive. the small one kept going down, not fighting back..this went on longer than I thought it should. she was across the street and suddenly I couldn't resist something inside ran up to her, staring and putting my face in front of her to take the heat off the other kid. she didn't hit me although she was angry enough. she just said I was crazy because it was none of my business..but I remember..I unplugged her anger by just standing there letting it come into me. I was facinated that I was fearless.

I think maybe..just maybe that whole act came from the soul's intentions here..to be without fear..and just for a moment I was proud of myself..that I could take the heat for another maybe..and it worked..confused her for one thing..
fear is a funny thing..I can see how it ruled my life..maybe feeling fear is self imposed limitations on the experience of PUL. kinda looks alot that way. its so easy to recognize love now because of what went before.
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... Who takes away death's sting deprives life of bitterness
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blink
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #5 - Dec 14th, 2005 at 10:17am
 
Alysia,
    You said,
"...so go for it guys....go for the miracle..and when u get out of bed in the morn..u will arise with a smile on your face and you'll wonder how it got there...then you'll understand about PUL, that only this matters and nothing else. theres no need to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders when we have such capacity to heal one another."

I really like this part too, Alysia.   I guess I have had a lot of miracles lately.  I have recently been in touch with a friend with whom I had a falling out 20 years ago.  It is amazing to realize that some "realities" that have been "frozen" in time can sometimes be changed just by willingness to open that door.  There is a time and a place for all things, as has been said.

Of course, twenty years can pass in the blink of an eye....and everything looks different after twenty years....EVERYTHING (even the things you really wish had stayed the same!)

For you to have released the pain in yourself and the other is truly a miracle, isn't it?  Not everyone can do this, nor should they feel that they must.

But anything IS possible.

love, blink  Smiley
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blink
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #6 - Dec 14th, 2005 at 10:35am
 
Alysia,
  You said,
"....staring and putting my face in front of her to take the heat off the other kid. she didn't hit me although she was angry enough. she just said I was crazy because it was none of my business..but I remember..I unplugged her anger by just standing there letting it come into me. I was facinated that I was fearless."

I have had this kind of experience.  Perhaps it is the element of surprise that catches them off guard.  I think it requires a special detachment to "pull it off" and I don't exactly know from where the detachment originates.  Perhaps it is simply determination to make a difference.

I wish it would happen more often,
but then, I wish a lot of things would happen more often!

blink
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LaffingRain
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #7 - Dec 14th, 2005 at 11:34am
 
reconciliations do have a feeling of "miracle" around them, like when you met up with your friend Blink from 20 years back..same here, I met up with an old boyfriend in the ethers..my god..he just looked at me and his facial expression delivered a rote which knocked me over. not to get too wordy, this man used to brag on his blue blood. of course I have none of this blue blood in my veins. he had simply come to celebrate me this time, instead of himself and that was PUL we had found our way back to. I'm just amazed that this physical reality we have here and the experiences and interactions which can and do take place in the astral realms are just as powerful to lend meaning to life.

thanks for your response again here, means a lot. so the fight I interrupted, as I think about it a little more, I remember how curious I was about why she seemed so incredibly angry with the little kid..seemed so out of proportion..that kid had somehow pushed her button..granted, it was none of my business..but I felt more empathy for the antigonizer than the kid getting punched around. I didn't know what would happen and I did get a hard shove from her. she asked me what I was doing there and couldn't say a word..never had many words in a verbal sense. we communicated spirit to spirit through the eye space..guess that's what my main story is about..eye contact..as thats where the soul speaks from..we get energy from each other..well, even the written word has energy bouncing off of it, but in person...thats more powerful. I think what energy I gave back was like a sad feeling..I was so sad for her that she nearly cried when I told her with my eyes she could hit me if she wanted to. she turned and hurried away with ragged breath. she was lovely, I told her this with the eyes too, she had her whole life in front of her and I just thought what a shame if she became an agressive person then died suddenly from the strain of it all. don't ask me how a 10 year old kid can think these sort of thoughts...I just wanted to make a point, that we are more within us than appearances speak to, we have souls with wisdom and knowledge within them if we can just tap them, we get more miracles..
I sense you know this already, so I be blabbing, u know, to express myself. I love it when people talk about their miracles as then we can maybe focus in that direction a little more. love, alysia
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... Who takes away death's sting deprives life of bitterness
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chilipepperflea
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #8 - Dec 15th, 2005 at 12:30pm
 
Hey,

Only just got round to reading this experience but its weird how some people can do that...i mean from my viewpoint i don't know if you guys agree but its just when looking with someone with pure emotion thats when it happens. Emotion can be love....hate...also like relization which kinda happened with you Alyisa....somehow, someway you made this girl relise through your emotions and soul connecting what was really going down here, a deep understanding that can't be put into words.

But my thing with emotion because ou saw it for a while and it really built up in you this is kinda all there was for this split-second moment, that emotion and connection.

Does that make sense? Just my ideas but haven't really experienced myself....not that type of character i don't think, I don't think everyone can do it can they? Unless really pushed to the limits sumhow?

Im glad i got round to reading, thanx for sharing Alyisia

Ryan
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LaffingRain
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Re: I thought he was evil..but..
Reply #9 - Dec 15th, 2005 at 1:22pm
 
Hi Ryan, I guess first I had to set aside emotion though, by setting aside my critical faculties? my judgment of how much it pained me to have to be in the same room with this guy? my intention was for a change of heart, for some respectful language. but to get to the respectful language first I had to change my attitude and see what would happen? it's harder to change attitude, as we had established this pattern of interaction. anyway..thank god for miracles!
thanks for your egging me on here Ryan. love, alysia
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