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Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us (Read 87675 times)
recoverer
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #120 - Feb 7th, 2014 at 9:00pm
 
When I communicate with spirits I get the feeling that an actual conscious being is communicating with me rather than stored memories.

Going by Mediums that seem genuine to me, they also receive information from conscious beings, rather than from some record. By some of the things they say, it seems as if they are interacting with spirits.

It is possible to tell the difference.


Lights of Love wrote on Feb 7th, 2014 at 8:00pm:
Don,

I wonder if it may be possible that ES's experience of dormant memories was an encounter with stored memory / akashic records that in his interpretation equaled "deceased memories" or the memories of the deceased?  That the memory is sometimes restored could mean guided access to it.  That would put a new light on what he said.

It's been so long since I've read any ES books.  Do you have a reference for this?  I'm curious about the rest of the context where he states this.

Kathy

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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #121 - Feb 7th, 2014 at 11:27pm
 
What good would it serve a dragonfly to remember when it was a bug in the mud at the bottom of a pond?
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #122 - Feb 8th, 2014 at 12:55am
 
recoverer wrote on Feb 7th, 2014 at 9:00pm:
When I communicate with spirits I get the feeling that an actual conscious being is communicating with me rather than stored memories.

Going by Mediums that seem genuine to me, they also receive information from conscious beings, rather than from some record. By some of the things they say, it seems as if they are interacting with spirits.

It is possible to tell the difference.



Albert,

Yes I can tell the difference as well, but I think you're missing my point.

What are memories if they're not dormant?  We know they are stored within Consciousness because every detail of a person's life is shown in the life review for example.  As I read Don's post it occurred to me that memory is latent or inactive when "in storage" and I wondered about ES's interpretation of what he encountered and attempted to describe. 

We don't need a go-between or someone to hand feed us information.  We can and do access it directly. I think ES was in contact with other beings, but I also think some of his information came directly from stored information in the Consciousness system as well.  Could he have interpreted that experience as us having dormant memories?  As well as "the Lord" restoring them when neccessary?  As in a life review for example.

K
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #123 - Feb 8th, 2014 at 2:11pm
 
Kathy:

I believe that information from spirit beings and stored information can be obtained.  But as we say- one can tell if one is receiving it from a spirit being-perhaps ADC is in some cases validated in such a way.
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #124 - Feb 8th, 2014 at 5:53pm
 
To me, it is ridiculous to claim that the newly dead realize earth life was illusory and "not real" and therefore see no need to communicate to loved ones.  Nor does it make sense to claim that most of the Self is stationed in the etheric and therefore reassurance to deceased loved ones is unnecessary.  The 5 cases below illustrate that deceased loved ones view earth life as very real, continue to be in touch with the emotions of loved ones,  deeply feel the need to comfort them through ADCs, and have awesome resources and abilities to make such healing contacts.  I realize that different destinations await different souls in the afterlife and different loved ones vary in their attunement compatibility and skills.  But when I observe who is actually denied such healing contact, I don't consider such rationalizations persuasive.  Many grieving people have researched and heard about such contacts and are deeply hurt that their loved one has not made the effort to share an ADC.  To me, this failure poses a serious moral issue for the whole concept of PUL as a key governing principle in the afterlife; and I resist the temptation to offer dangerously doctrinaire and simple-minded answers to baffling complex questions.  Even the dormant memory issue does not totally address this problem, because the Lord at times reactivates memory, making contact a possibility. 

I created the postmortem evolutionary thread, in part, because I wonder if the afterlife systems just have not adquately evolved yet to make such contacts routine.  I wonder if souls give up after preliminary futile efforts to make contact, and are not informed about a training regimen to develop ADC skills.  For me, this problem is even a barrier to believing in an afterlife, a barrier I strive to overcome with faith.  Please read the 5 brief summations below and see what you feel  they reveal about the possibility of postmortem ADCs. 

I don't want to retell long NDE and ADC experiences I have shared over the years.  So I'll take the details of these 5 accounts for granted in what I say and draw some inferences.

(1) Leonard's son Jeff came back from the dead and took his Dad for a ride in his old pickup.  Why?  (a) to reassure Leonard that his family was together and OK; (b) to help Loenard tie up loose ends in settling his estate.  Jeff made it clear that he needed divine permission to manifest in this way.  When Leonard's grief did not abate, Jeff's wife Karen visited him the next day and urged him to return to his house and "comfort Mom." 

(2) In 2 separate NDEs Phyllis was taken to "a mall that wasn't really a mall" (a mall of white light) and confronted by her mother at a table.  The confrontation focused on Phyllis's unwillingness to get in touch with her feelings and grieve her mother's loss.  The Mom claimed that Phyllis's detachment from her emotions was preventing her progress "on the other side."  I doubt that Phyllis ever heeded her Mom's plea!  It is often claimed that exceesive grief can also impede progress on the other side.  ADCs seem ideally suited to address this problem.

(3) Tami's death at age 19 at WSU devasted her Mom.  Realizing this, Tami often appeared full-bodied in waking visions and dreams to her Mom to converse with her amd comfort her.  When this was no longer possible due to her postmortem progression, Tami somehow inprinted her name "Tami" with a smily face on a dollar received in changed by her uncle in a minimart, so that the family could rejoice in her progress and transition. The daughter's acute sensitivity to her Mom's grief strikes me as a phenomenon that must be widespread in the astral realms, but normally not motivation for a compelling healing visit.  Dreams of the departed often lack the power comfort because they can be dismissed as the product of wishful thinking.   

(4) A gal (name forgotten) from my church told me she was awakened to see her dead sister glowing in the dark. The conversation involved comfort and shared information about how the dead sister was doing.  Why aren't such healing visits routine?   

(4) Sebby died of a terminal condition at age 16.  I told his adoptive parents that they would receive a compelling sign that Sebby was OK mediated through someone else.  Just outside the funeral home, a relative spotted Sebby's name printed in a cloud formation in his characteristic printing.  This manifestation greatly assisted Lloyd and Marry Ann's grief process. I think Sebby had divine assistance to create this sign in the sky.

(5) The late Willam James kept his promise to his friend James Hyslop to confirm his survival.  But it took a whole year and had to be conveyed through a couple in Ireland playing with a Ouija board and through  the meaningful concrete message "Remember the red pyjamas." I infer from this that William James tried several more obvious forms of ADC without success before he found something that worked.

Don
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #125 - Feb 8th, 2014 at 7:54pm
 
ADCs run the gamut.  Some are downright funny!

A friend of a woman whose husband died called in to a radio show that had, as a topic for that day, evidence of life after death.

She had recently gone to the woman's house where a small gathering of friends were comforting the widow.

As I recall there were about 8 or 9 people there.  At some point a vase sitting on top of the tv actually levitated and moved to the center of the room where it suddenly fell, crashing into pieces on the floor.

The guests were awestruck.  Some actually reported they could make out a pair of ethereal hands carrying the vase although others did not see the hands.

As the others were recovering from the shock, the widow broke out into laughter and tears.

It seems her husband had hated that particular vase, and had often threatened his wife that if it were up to him he would get rid of it.

She took great relief in what otherwise could have been a scary event.  It gave her immense comfort that her husband was not only still alive but chose that particular act to prove it. 

As I've mentioned to Don about his Leonard story, what I don't understand is how a spirit was able to move a physical object since I've often heard that their hands would simply pass right through such objects.

Apparently, like so many other things, there are exceptions to what we think of as being the norm.

R
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #126 - Feb 8th, 2014 at 11:42pm
 
Rondele,

When our expectations of what is possible are shattered by breath-taking exceptions, I think: What can we learn that might make the exceptions the rule?  Are the glorious exceptions a sign that interaction with the afterlife is evolving on both sides as hidden lessons are absorbed? 

For example, I always thought Alzheimer's Disease was incurable.  Oh, my prayer was once answered for a distraught Russ who was desperate to reconcile with his mother in the final stages of this disease.  She was in a vegetative state, but prayer gave her total lucidity and restored rationality for 45 minutes.  Mother and son were able to explain their points of view.  Tears flowed and love was beautifully and healingly reaffirmed.  But after 45 minutes, it was as if someone clicked a switch and she was an unconscious mannequin again, dying 20 minutes later of the disease. This glorious remission was not a cure.

But then I read an excited article by a United Methodist pastor whose father was cured of advanced Alzheimer's after the son went to the Western Wall of the Jerusalem Temple and prayed for him.  His Dad didn't know who he was, could not recognize family members, and could not find his house if we went for a stroll.  Yet prayer cured him and his son delights in his Dad's banjo playing once again.  So I am at times awed by possibilities I formerly denied and often wonder how devastatingly our unconscious beliefs rob us of indescribably joyful miracles.

Don

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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #127 - Feb 9th, 2014 at 9:47am
 
I tend to see the glass as half full rather than half empty.  My meaning is to say that rather than speak a common refrain of "there is no afterlife since most people don't get tangible verifications of their loved ones", I say: if you have even one well documented spectacular verification, you have already defeated the premise that the afterlife does not exist.  Period.  Now Don has mentioned a half dozen verifications that meant something to the still-living bereaved loved ones.  And Roger too.  And yet, there is a lack of satisfaction at how the system works.

Part of the problem is the implied superiority while we are living in the physical world of being alive in the "real" world.  The awfulness of disease and suffering - it seems, on a first glance, that if life/God were fair, it shouldn't happen.  Healing should occur, right?  Well what if our starting premises were wrong?  What if a healing and persistence in a human body is not the best thing for the person?  How are we to know this, since most of us don't know what it is like right now to be free of the physical world, earthly body and outer ego we all carry around?

There is so much that is unknown about the way our consciousness connects to others in the afterlife and how it might break the barriers into the density of the physical world, that it is difficult to even speculate about it, so why take a negative view, if one is familiar with even a scattering of verifications?

For me the problems arise due to certain faulty premises about the need to have this contact.

1.  that it is "unfair" or "cruel" if the living person wants the contact but does not get any direct contact, when another person does.

2. that the physical world is the place to be, and must be better for any individual, so if they are sick or ill, it is better that they be healed than to shed their body into the afterlife. 

3.  that our loved ones must be "uncaring" or helpless if we don't receive the comfort of afterlife contact. 

4.  That the going on of earthly events related to our individual egos has equal importance to our spiritual growth or objectives. 

I disagree with most of the above premises, but they are hidden underneath the discussion about the lack of afterlife contact and the implications.  Some invoke "memory loss" because of a few contacts with those on the other side, and it could explain how otherwise caring souls don't appear to make contact with us.  I have refuted the memory loss hypothesis on the other thread, and I believe there is ample evidence that it is not inevitable, and that memory can be and is accessed when people think of each other or are in need.

But what if contact after death is a "spiritual caress," where we feel, in the middle of grief that we are warm and safe and will be ok?   Why does time heal all wounds?  Is it all from ourselves, or does or emotional healing get help from the other side?

Clearly the paucity of stunning physical world contacts bothers some, but as we all recall from early grade school, it takes only one well documented refutation to sink a negative hypothesis.  Perhaps the answer to the question of this thread is (as Don mentioned before) faith.  Faith in the love we share with our deceased friends and relatives.  Faith in ourselves and in the process of life. 


M
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #128 - Feb 9th, 2014 at 4:02pm
 
Quote:
Quote Don: To me, it is ridiculous to claim that the newly dead realize earth life was illusory and "not real" and therefore see no need to communicate to loved ones. Nor does it make sense to claim that most of the Self is stationd in the etheric and therefore reassurance to deceased loved ones is unnecessary.

Yes, sometimes things do seem ridiculous or right out of a sci-fi movie, but I don't think anyone that I know of made the claim that the "newly dead" sees no need to communicate with loved ones, however, once the deceased has acclimated to a "higher" level of spiritual being, it is my understanding that:

1.  They no longer exist as the same "human personality" they were when they existed in the ELS.  They have been transformed into the spiritual being they were before they incarnated.

2.  They do recognize that while ELS appears in every way to be "real", it is not fundamentally real because it is a virtual world of consciousness with governing laws, created by Consciousness where physical interaction can take place between individualized beings for evolutionary purposes.  We also play a part in creating the collective consciousness within this realm because we've been given free rein within these limits.  How we continue to evolve is up to us, first individually, then as a whole.  I suspect we also have a part in the evolution of other realms such as the one we find ourselves in upon death of the physical body.  If more ADC is something deemed beneficial and we as a whole collective choose to manifest or evolve this, it may be possible. 

3.  Not only is most of the Self positioned in the non-physical, so are we as humans.  There is no true separation.  That we are separate is the illusion.  All that is taking place, is taking place within the confines of God Consciousness.  Acts 17:28.  Some describe it as the ALL existing as God's dream.  Nanci Danison devotes several pages to her description.  She uses the metaphor of sunbeams, and calls them "Sourcebeams" meaning that we all are "extensions" of Source at differing vibrations or levels of consciousness/being.  Scientists are saying the same thing using a more scientific approach and terminology.  There's more than just similarities here as people, including myself want to know how things work... To me, it is a continual search for the truth of how things work.  How is it possible that we are here... that we exist as a deeper level of being... and so on.  For me, a lot of the illusion has already dissolved.  When that happens, we move on to search for answers to our other pressing questions.

If what's been communicated to me and obviously to others per their various descriptions of the same thing has some truth, then I'm more than willing to invest some of my time to gain a better understanding... to find the truth.

Concerning ADC's I'm one that believes they actually do occur more often than the statistics indicate because I think many people are unwilling to talk about their experiences for various reasons... feeling foolish or that they won't be believed by others, and so on, especially if the ADC is particularly sensational.  Here's a few that come to mind at the moment:

Roger's mother (not our Roger) passed away on Christmas Eve.  A few days later a very sad and distressed Roger sat alone at his kitchen table before getting ready to leave for her funeral.  His mother appeared to him sitting next to him.  Her bodily features were clearly recognizable, yet she appeared as this brilliant, sparkling light as she communicated her love and comfort to him.

A similar appearance was made by Kate's grandmother.  A 17 year old Kate lay in bed starring at a closet door while thinking of, and missing her grandmother when suddenly the door disappeared from her view and her grandmother appeared "larger than life" (her words) and in brilliant colored light, but recognizable to her as the person she remembered.  Grandmother also communicated her love to her granddaughter.

Two 11 year old girls were walking home and decided to take a short cut through a cemetery and became lost among all of the curving roadways.  As darkness approached they'd finally found the gate, but it was locked.  As they wandered, looking for a way out they became more and more frightened, when suddenly a woman appeared and showed them the way to a tree they could climb to get over the fence and jump down on the other side, then the woman disappeared.  The girls knew she was a ghost because she floated along with them, rather than walked, however, she'd appeared as though she were a physical person.

My father appeared to me during a time of stress several years after his death.  At the time I wasn't thinking of him, but was upset for reasons I won't go into when he came to me.  He appeared not as a brilliant light, but as the same person he was when alive.  Even though he looked just as he had physically and communicated with me, I cannot be absolutely certain it truly was him.  This is because I know spiritual beings do impersonate someone if they think it will be beneficial to someone's spiritual growth.  But for all appearances he was real, at least to me at that moment in time.

My mother also appeared to me in a comical way not only right at the time of her death, but also a week or so afterwards.  I've already posted these so won't go into detail again.

I could go on with many more, but for the sake of brevity I'll stop here.

Matthew, you bring up some excellent points!  Thanks!

Kathy
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #129 - Feb 9th, 2014 at 5:00pm
 
Kathy-

A good friend of ours in the Buffalo area told a story (after I mentioned my own encounter with a spiritual being who intervened to save my life as a child) about an experience he had many years ago.

He was stranded one winter night in a blinding snowstorm.  His car got stuck on a back road and he left it, thinking he knew how to get to the main road.

He became disoriented and was convinced he was hopelessly lost.  His mind at the time was heavy with a divorce pending and his small children soon to have their family broken up.  He began sobbing, not knowing what to do or how to proceed.  He asked God for help.

The next thing he knew, a man approached him seemingly out of nowhere.  He told him to follow, and they finally came to the main highway he had been seeking.

He turned to thank the man, but he was gone.  And when he looked behind him in the direction they had come, there was only one pair of footsteps in the snow.  Also the man had comforted him, telling him that his family would be ok, that his troubles would not last.

As it turned out at some point afterwards, his wife (who had been involved with someone else and was planning on leaving) realized the pain she would be causing to both him and their children and ended her affair.

To this day (30 some years later) they are still married with grandchildren.  He told us the story one day at our cottage although at the time we had no idea about their marital problems.  It was pretty emotional for him and for that matter for all of us.  I doubt he would have told that story had I not told them about my own experience.

Stories like this are numerous.  As you say, lots of people keep them to their selves probably from fears of ridicule.

What does bother me are cases of grief-stricken parents who lose their children to illness or accidents.  One mother in our area was backing out of her garage and didn't see her small child sitting on the driveway.  She ran over him and he died instantly.

Her grief was intense.  As was her guilt.  It's one thing when our elderly parents die, but when we are the cause albeit accidentally of the death of our child it's a whole different ballgame.  I will never know if she got an ADC or not, but that's someone who needs it more than we can comprehend and I would sure like an explanation if a comforting ADC was not forthcoming.

R
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #130 - Feb 9th, 2014 at 5:27pm
 
Not sure if this counts as an ADC but it I could'nt explain it. About 10 years ago I was reading Joel Rothschild's 'Signals' about how Joel had received ADCs from his friend who had died of AIDS. About half way through the book my mobile phone made a 'message received' noise and a single love heart appeared on the screen with no sender number. I did'nt take much notice of it until I reached the end of the book where the author related how single love hearts had kept appearing during the production of the book (there was a single heart on the last page of the book which had appeared in the printing) and others connected with the book had reported them. It never happened to me again.It seems that many little events like this may happen but we take little notice of them getting on with everyday life instead.

Regarding the inconsistency of ADCs I would widen that to include everything which comes under the 'paranormal' umbrella; the fact that generally phenomena can't be called to obedient order has led skeptics to conclude that they don't exist. But as this thread has shown when they come verifications can be spectacular.Tom Campbell has suggested we live within a subset reality, part of a larger meta-reality so we cannot really see the 'bigger picture'. Equally validly religious people may put it down to God's grace, essentially unknowable by humans in physical reality.

I think this link neatly sums up our challenges as 'Flatlanders' :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWyTxCsIXE4

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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #131 - Feb 9th, 2014 at 6:12pm
 
Yes I'd say that experience falls under the ADC umbrella. 

I'm not so sure, however, about Don's theory of spiritual evolution.  For one thing, evolution requires by definition a time sequence.  Yet supposedly time as we know it does not exist in the afterlife. 

On the other hand that can't mean existence in the afterlife is stagnant.  Maybe we are on earth where time is sequential precisely because linear time is necessary in order to evolve and grow. 

Since existence is said to be simultaneous, maybe we grow here in order to grow there?  Earth has its own unique challenges and opportunities that possibly aren't available in the afterlife.....just speculating here.

Bottom line for me is that if there is an afterlife, it must be pretty spectacular.  And if there isn't, then we are left with trying to explain all the phenomena that happen here that certainly point to a realm of existence beyond our short time on earth.

R
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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #132 - Feb 9th, 2014 at 8:12pm
 
Hi Roger,

Yes, things like this do happen far too often.  Not too long ago a mother backed over her two year here as well.  And just a few weeks ago a mother forgot to drop off her child at daycare, drove to work and left the child in the car seat.  The child froze to death.  What I don't understand is how a parent can't know where their child is?  As a parent, isn't it your responsibility to know?  Or at least check to make sure they're safely in the house or in a safe area?  Of course it is, at least according to the law, but we are human and we do make mistakes.  That's part of the reality we live in and we know the type of world this is, with all of its possibility for suffering, before we incarnate.  I don't think we necessarily know all the particulars, but we do know that this can be an environment that produces great suffering at times.  Still we choose to come here.

I know the suffering of the mother who forgot her child in the car was immense and to top it off she was arrested for child neglect and abuse and will likely spend several years in prison.  I didn't know her well, only from when she was a child as one of my daughter's friends that spent time at my house, but my daughter had remained friends with her over the years.  According to my daughter, she was ordinarily a good, conscientious mother.   She has two older children and is devastated that her mind could have been so completely preoccupied with other things to forget something so vital as taking her child to daycare, but thinking that she had.

My brother died when he was 19 from an asthma attack.  My mom suffered tremendously because of her loss.  So did I.  He and I were very close.  My oldest had been born 5 days before and the last time I saw him was when he'd visited me in the hospital.  He just sat there grinning from ear to ear, completely enthralled with his new little niece.  No one that I know of in our family ever had an ADC from him.  I've wondered why that was, especially since I did have ADC from both my parents.  At least for me, the question arises, was this because several years later I was more "in tune" spiritually?  Not mentioned earlier in this thread, I'd also experienced a voice calling my dad just before he passed as well as felt his and my mother's presence during my mom's graveside service.  The presence of both my parent's was not only felt by me, but several others who were in awe and commented about it.

I suppose there could be any number of reasons why someone doesn't receive an ADC, but one that isn't often thought of is that perhaps we suffer for a reason, or perhaps suffering is somehow beneficial to our overall spiritual growth, even if unimaginable to us, especially if we are the ones suffering.  We've all heard of parent's that lost a child because not only because of illness, or unintentional carelessness, but also from horrendous things such as murder, and the parent's grow out of their grief to turn that around, and because of their suffering, they become advocates for the betterment of society.  So, I wonder, is there great purpose that is unknown to us at our level of consciousness?

Kathy

PS  Just saw your last post and  well stated. You make excellent points!  Yes, time does exist in the afterlife, differently than what we experience in ELS.  I believe Don has said this as well.  Time is fundamental to the evolution of consciousness and if it did not exist "there" it would not exist "here."  My understanding is that time first began when Consciousness became aware of a difference between one state and another state.  Evolution would not be possible if time did not exist in some form.

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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #133 - Feb 10th, 2014 at 3:47pm
 
  What is time? 

I think Kathy hinted at the deeper meaning of same.  Perhaps it's a perception of change from one state to another?   

  Perhaps that's why it's somewhat relative to the particular dimension we are focusing in, since different "dimensions" or consciousness states means a relative degree of separation from or attunement too that Consciousness state of the original, that of full conscious awareness of Onenesss?

   Perhaps that's why when we have experiences in those states closer to that, time starts to become rather inclusive, connected, and holistic?  With less perceptual distinction between past, present, and future? 

Perhaps that's why in this dimension, the physical Earth, time is perceived to be so distinct, separated, and linear, because this is a dimension or consciousness state that is far from the above?

Perhaps this dimension has come to represent and externalize the inner stuckness which first happened in pure consciousness?  Perhaps we are in the process of Retrieving the physical in a sense, or rather those stuck and imbalanced aspects of the larger self?   

  Where did this have it's origins?  Perhaps in the original creative experimentation by the Source wherein when it first moved within itself and formed individuals within same, some unforeseen chaos happened. 

   Some individuals somehow came to be repelled by their origins and their connections to others within the Whole.  Some of these parts wanted nothing to do with the Whole and with Oneness. 

  The question is, was this what we would call freewill choice, or some kind of accident of creation?   Or an odd admixture of both?    Not so simple as just bad, accidental batches, but neither so simple as pure conscious choice on their parts for there was some inherent imbalance which inclined them...?

   

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Re: Why Dead Loved Ones Don't Contact Us
Reply #134 - Feb 13th, 2014 at 11:29am
 
Here is some food for thought on this subject:
A conversation following the Death of John Field
From "The reluctant Messiah" by Sidney Field
Jiddu Krishnamurti

This is a very long quote copied from pp. 117, 118 and pp. 135-157 from the book "The reluctant Messiah" by Sidney Field, Paragon House, New York 1989, Edited by Peter Hay, ISBN 1-55778-180-X, Copyright 1989 by Sidney Field.

Sidney Field was a close friend to Krishnamurti and the book is about all the encounters he had with K. At page 117, Sidney wrote:

My brother, John, died early in January, 1972. His death was totally unexpected and a great shock to me. John had been a photographer, a lover of adventure, women and wine, a mean of great Latin charm. He had known Krishnaji as long as I had, and had many times delighted him with his stories and personal adventures. Krishnaji had just arrived from Europe and was staying in Malibu at the home of Mrs. Zimbalist. I called him to give him the sad news, saying I wanted to see him, and he asked me to come the following day for lunch.

He greeted me most affectionately. At the dining table I came right to the point: "Has John survived his bodily death in a subtler form? Yes or no?" There was a moment's silence. "My gut feeling," I went on, "is that he is here beside me, right now."

"Of course he is, right here beside you," said Krishnaji. "He's very close to you, and will continue being close for some time." Two hours later we were still deep into the subject of death and the hereafter. He referred to that part of the personality that survives bodily death as an echo, instead of an astral body, as the Theosophists call it, the echo of the person who lived on earth, the duration of its life on the other side depending on the strength of the individual's earthly personality. "Dr. Besant's echo, for instance," he said, "will go on for a long time, for she had a very strong personality."

"Your viewpoint here is very similar to that of the Theosophists," I said.

"With one important difference," he replied. "There is no permanent substance that survives the death of the body. Whether the ego lasts one year, ten thousand, or a million years, it must finally come to an end."

Krishnaji's remarks during this conversation were among the most revealing and enlightening I had ever heard him make on the subject of death and survival beyond it. At the end of our talk Mrs. Zimbalist remarked that it was a great pity we had not recorded it, for, prodded by insistent questioning and probing on my part, and aided by a sympathetic Mrs. Zimbalist, Krishnaji had explored what to us was a new dimension on this fascinating subject.

Krishnaji has an extraordinary capacity for recall, when he wants to use that gift, and a few days later, he Alain Naude and Mrs. Zimbalist recreated the entire conversation, this time recording it, with Naude asking Krishnaji essentially the same questions I had asked. It was staged in a much quieter atmosphere, naturally, and Naude's questions were cool and intellectual. They did not have the same urgency and strong feeling of my approach, for I was hurting at the time. Nevertheless, I was fascinated when I heard the recording. Krishnaji gave me permission to publish it in connection with this memoir, and it appears in the Appendix.
Appendix
A conversation following the Death of John Field
Participants : J. Krishnamurti , Alain Naude , Mary Zimbalist
recorded on january 14, 1972
Krishnamurti : We said the other day Sidney Field came to see me. His brother John died recently. You knew him. He was very concerned whether his brother was living in a different level of consciousness; wether there was John as an entity born [in the] next life. And did I believe in reincarnation and what did it mean. And so he had a lot of questions. He was having a difficult time with himself because of his brother, whom he loved and whom we have known for years. So out of that conversation two things came up. First, is there a permanent ego? If there is such a thing as a permanent something, then what is its relationship from the present to the future? The future being next life or ten years later. But if you admit or accept or believe or assert that there is a permanent ego, then reincarnation...

Alain Naude: ... is inevitable.

K: Not inevitable. I wouldn't say inevitable. It is plausible, because the permanent ego, to me, if it is permanent, can be changed in ten years' time. It can incarnate differently in ten years time.

A: We read this all the time in the Indian scriptures. We read about children who remember the past life, about a girl who said, "What am I doing here? My home is in some other village. I'm married to so and so. I have three children." And in many cases I believe that this has been verified.

K: I don't know. So there is that. If there is no permanent entity, then what is reincarnation? Both involve time, both involve a movement in space. Space being environment, relationship, pressure, all that existing within that space, time.

A: Within time and temporal circomstances ...

K: ... That is, culture etcetera ...

A: ... Within some sort of social set-up.
K: So is there a permanent me? Obviously not. But Sidney said, "Then what is it that I feel, that John is with me? When I enter the room, I know he is there. I'm not fooling myself, I'm not imagining; I feel him there as I feel my sister who was in that room yesterday. It's as clear, as definite as that."

A: And also sir, when you say "obviously not" , would you explain that ?

K: But wait. So he says, "My brother is there." I said of course he is there, because first of all you have your association and memories of John and that is projected, and that projection is your remembrance.

A: So that the John who was contained within you is that.

K: And when John lived he was associated with you. His presence is with you. When he was living, you might not have seen him all day, but his presence was in that room.

A: His presence was there, and perhaps this is what people mean when they speak of an aura.

K: No, aura is different. Let's not push that in yet.

Mary Zimbalist: May I interrupt - when you say he was in that room, whether alive or dead, was there something external to his brother and sister that was there, or was it in their consciousness?

K: It is both in their consciousness and outside consciousness. I can project my brother and say he was with me last night, feeling he was with me, that may emanate from me; or John, who died ten days ago - his atmosphere, his thoughts, his way of behaving still remaining there, even though physically he might have gone.
A: The psychic momentum.

K: The physical heat.

Z: Are you saying there is a sort of energy, for want of a better word, which human beings give off?

K: There was a photograph of a parking lot taken where there had been many cars, and the photo showed, although there were no cars there, the form of the cars that had been there.

A: Yes. I saw that.

K: That is, the heat that the car had left came on the negative.

A: And also one day when we were living in Gstaad, the first time I was your guest at Gstaad, we were living as Les Capris - you left for America before any of us left, and I went into that flat - you were still alive and on your way to America and your presence was there, extremely strong.

K: That's it.

A: Your presence was so strong, one felt one could touch you. This was not simply because I was thinking about you before I entered the flat.

K: So there are three possibilities. I project out of my remembrance and consciousness, or pick up the risidual energy of John.

A: Like a smell that would linger.

K: John's thought or John's existence is still there.
A: That's the third possibility.

Z: What do you mean by that, John' existenc?

A: That John is really there as before he died? The third possibility.

K: I live in a room for a number of years. The presence of that room contained my energy, my thoughts, my feelings.

A: It contains its own energy, and when we go into a new house it sometimes takes time before you are rid of the person who was there before you, even though you may not have known him.

K: So those are the three possibilities. And the other is John's thought, because John clings to life. John's desires are there in the air, not in the room.

A: Immaterially.

K: Yes, they are there just like a thought.

A: And does that mean that John is conscious and there is a being who is self-conscious calling himself John, thinking those thoughts?

K: I doubt it.

A: I think that is what the people who believe in reincarnation would postulate.

K: See what happens, Sir. This makes four possibilities and the idea that John whose physical body is gone, exists in thought.
A: In his own thought or someone else's?

K: In his own thought.

A: Exists as a thinking entity.

K: As a thinking entity exists.

A: As a conscious being.

K: That is - listen to this, it's rather interesting - John continues because he is the world of vulgarity, of greed, of envy, of drinking, and of competition. That is the common pattern of man. It continues and John may be identified with that, or is that.

A: John is the desires, the thoughts, the beliefs, the associations.

K: Of the world.

A: Which are incarnate and which are material.

K: Which is the world - which is everybody.

A: This is a big thing you are saying. It would be nice if you could explain it a bit better. When you say John persists, John continues because there is a continuation of the vulgar in him - the vulgar being worldly, material association.

K: That is right: fear, wanting power, position.

A: Desire to be as an entity.
K: So that, because that is a common thing of the world and the world does incarnate.

A: You say the world does incarnate.

K: Take the mass of the people. They are caught in this stream and that stream goes on. I may have a son who is part of that stream and in that stream there is John also, as a human being who is caught in it. And my son may remember some of John's attitudes.

A: Ah but you are saying something different.

K: Yes.

A: You are saying that John is contained in all the memories that different people have of him. In that respect we can see that he does exist. Because I remember a friend of mine died not long ago, and it was very clear to me when I thought about it that in fact he was very much alive in the memories of all the people who had loved him.

K: That's just it.

A: Therefore, he was not absent from the world, he was still in the stream of events which we call the world, which is the lives of different people who had associated with him. In that sense we see that he can perhaps live forever.

K: Unless he breaks away from it - breaks away from the stream. A man who is not vulgar - let's use that word, vulgar, representing all this ... greed, envy, power, position, hatred, desires, all that - let's call that vulgar. Unless I am free from the vulgar, I will continue representing the whole of vulgarity, the whole vulgarity of man.

A: Yes, I will be that vulgarity by pursuing it, and in fact incarnating in it, giving it life.

K: Therefore I incarnate in that vulgarity. That is, first I can project John, my brother.
A: In my thought and imagination or remember him. The second point, I can pick up his kinetic energy, which is still around.

K: His smell, his taste, his saying the words.

A:The pipe which is unsmoked on the desk, the half-finished letter.

K: All that.

A: Flowers he picked in the garden.

K: Third, the thought remains in the room.

A: Thought remains in the room?

K: Feelings ...

A: One might say, the psychic equivalent of his kinetic energy.

K: Yes.

A: His thought remains almost as a material smell. As a physical smell.

K: That's right.

A: The energy of thought remains like an old coat that you hang up.

K: Thought, will, if he has a very strong will; active desires and thought, they also remain.
A: But that's not different from the third point. The third point is that thought remains, which is will, which is desire.

K: The fourth point is the stream of vulgarity.

A: That's not very clear.

K: Look, sir, I live an ordinary life, like millions and millions of people.

A: Yes, pursuing goals, hopes and fears.

K: I live the usual life. A little more refined, a little bit higher or lower, along the same current, I follow that current. I am that current. Me, who is that current, is bound to continue in that stream, which is the stream of me. I'm not different from millions of other people.

A: Therefore are you saying, sir, even, dead I continue because the things which were me are continuing.

K: In the human being.

A: Therefore, I survive. I was not different from the things which filled and preoccupied my life.

K: That's right.

A: Since these things which filled and occupied my life survive, in a manner of speaking I survive since they do.

K: That's right. That's four points.

A: The question is about the fifth. Is there a conscious thinking entity who knows that he is conscious when everybody has said, "There goes poor old John," even put him in the ground. Is there a conscious entity who immaterially says, "Good gracious, they've put that body in the ground but I have consciousness of being alive."
K: Yes.

A: That is the question which I think is difficult to answer.

K: Sidney was asking that question.

A: Because we see that everybody does exist in these other ways after death.

K: Now, you are asking the question, Does John, whose body is burned - cremated - does that entity continue to live?

A: Does that entity continue to have its consciousness of its own existence?

K: I question whether there is a seperate John.

A: You said at the beginning, is there such a thing as a permanent ego? You said obviously not.

K: When you say that John, my brother, is dead and ask wether he is living, living in a seperate consciousness, I question whether he was ever seperate from the stream.

A: Yes.

K: You follow what I am saying, sir?

A: Was there a John alive?

K: When John was alive, was he different from the stream?

A: The stream filled his consciousness of himself. His consciousness of himself was the stream knowing himself.
K: No, sir, just go slowly. It's rather complicated. The stream of humanity is anger, hate, jealosy, seeking power, position, cheating, corrupt, polluted. That is the stream. Of that stream is my brother John. When he existed physically, he has a physical body, but psychologically he was of this. Therefore was he ever different from this? From the stream? Or only physically different and therefore thinking he was different. You follow my point?

A: There was an entity who was self-conscious ...

K: ... As John.

A: He was self-conscious, and the stream was in relationship to himself.

K: Yes.

A: My wife, my child, my love.

K: But was John inwardly different from the stream? That's my point. Therefore what is dead is the body. And the continuation of John is part of that stream. I, as his brother, would like to think of him as separate because he lived with me as a seperate being physically. Inwardly he was of the stream. Therefore, was there a John who was different from the stream? And, if he was different, then what happens? I don't know if you follow.

A: There is a stream from outside and there is a stream from inside. Vulgarity seen in the street is from the man who feels himself to be acting in the moment of that vulgarity. I insult somebody. This is vulgarity. You see that vulgarity from the outside and say there is a vulgar act. I who am insulting somebody see the act in a different way. I feel self-conscious life at the moment when I insult. In fact I insult because there is a conscious thinking about me. I am protecting myself, so I insult.

K: My point is, this is what is happening with one hundred million people. Millions of people. As long as I swim in that stream, am I different? Is the real John from the stream?
A: Was there ever a John?

K: That's all my point.

A: There was conscious determination which felt itself to be John.

K: Yes, but I can imagine. I can invent because I am different.

A: There was imagination, thought, calling itself John.

K: Yes, sir.

A: Now, does that thought still call itself John?

K: But I belong to that stream.

A: You always belong to the stream.

K: There is no separate entity as John who was my brother, who is now dead.

A: Are you saying that there is no individual?

K: No, this is what we call permanent. The permanent ego is this.

A: What we think is individual.

K: Individual, the collective, the self.

A: Yes, the creation of thought which calls itself self.
K: It is of this stream.

A: That's right.

K: Therefore, was there ever a John? There is only a John when he is out of the stream.

A: That's right.

K: So first we are trying to find out if there is a permanent ego which incarnates.

A: The nature of the ego is imperminent.

K: Reincarnation is in the whole of Asia, and the modern people who believe in it say there is a permanent ego. You take many lives so that it can become dissolved and be absorbed in Brahma and all that. Now, is there from the beginning a permanent entity, an entity that lasts centuries and centuries? There is no such entity, obviously. I like to think I'm permanent. My permanence is identified with my furniture, my wife, my husband, surcumstances. These are words and images of thought. I don't actually possess that chair. I call it mine.

A: Exactly. You think it's a chair and you own it.

K: I like to think I own it.

A: But it's just an idea.

K: So, watch it. So there is no permanent self. If there was a permanent self, it would be this stream. Now, realizing that I am like the rest of the world, that there is no seperate K, or John, as my brother, then I can incarnate if I step out of it. Incarnate in the sense that the change can take place away from the stream. In the stream there is no change.
A: If there is permanence, it is outside the stream.

K: No, sir, permanency, semipermanency, is the stream.

A: And therefore it is not permanent. If it is permanent, it is not the stream. Therefore, if there is an entity, then it must be out of the stream. Therefore, that which is true, that which is permanent, is not a something.

K: It is not in the stream.

A: That's right.

K: When Naude dies, as long as he belongs to the stream, that stream and its flow is semipermanent.

A: Yes, It goes on. It's a historical thing.

K: But if Naude says, I will incarnate, not in the next life, now, tomorrow, which means I will step out of the stream, he is no longer belonging to the stream; therefore there is nothing permanent.

A: There is nothing to reincarnate. Therefore, that which reincarnates, if reincarnation is possible, is not permanent anyway.

K: No, it's the stream.

A: It's very temporal.

K: Don't put it that way.

A: A seperate entity is not real.

K: No, as long as I belong to the stream ...
A: I don't really exist ...

K: There is no separate entity. I am the world.

A: That's right.

K: When I step out of the world, is there a me to continue?

A: Exactly, It's beautiful.

K: So, what we are trying to do is justify the existence of the stream.

A: Is that what we are trying to do?

K: Of course, when I say I must have many lives and therefore I must go through the stream.

A: What we are trying to do, then, is we are trying to establish that we are different from the stream.

K: We are not.

A: We are not different from the stream.

K: So, sir, then what happens? If there is no permanent John or K or Naude or Zimbalist, what happens? You remember, sir, I think I read it in the Tibetan tradition or some other tradition, that when a person dies, is dying, the priest or the monk comes in and sends all the family away, locks the door and says to the dying man, "Look you're dying - let go - let all of your antagonisms, all your worldliness, all your ambition, let go, because you are going to meet a light in which you will be absorbed, if you let go. If not, you'll come back. Which is, come back to the stream. You will be the stream again.
A: Yes.

K: So what happens to you if you step out of the stream?

A: You step out of the stream, you cease to be, but the you which was, was only created by thought, anyway.

K: Which is the stream.

A: Vulgarity.

K: Vulgarity. What happens if you step out of the stream? The stepping out is the incarnation. Yes, sir, but that is a new thing you are coming into. There is a new dimension coming into being.

A: Yes.

K: Now, what happens? You follow? Naude has stepped out of the stream. What happens? You are not an artist. Not a businessman. You are not a polititian, not a musician, all that identification is part of the stream.

A: All the qualities.

K: All the qualities. When you discard that, what happens?

A: You have no identity.

K: Identity is here. Say, for instance, Napoleon, or any of these so-called world leaders: they killed, they butchered, they did every horror imaginable, they lived and died in the stream, they were of the stream. That is very simple and clear. There is a man who steps out of the stream.

A: Before physical death?
K: Of course; otherwise there is no point.

A: Therefore, another dimension is born.

K: What happens?

A: The ending of the dimension which is familiar to us is another dimension, but it cannot be postulated at all because all postulation is in terms fo the dimension we are in.

K: Yes, but suppose you, living now ...

A: Step out of it.

K: Step out of the stream. What happens?

A: This is death, sir.

K: No, sir.

A: This is death, but no physical death.

K: You see, you step out of it. What happens?

A: Nothing can be said about what happens.

K: Wait, sir. You see, none of us step out of the river, and we are always from the river, trying to reach the other shore.

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