I am back, and posting again, and impressed at the changes.  Bruce and I share at least one thing in common that I know of, and that is, our intellectual background was grounded in science (he as an engineer, and I as a physician).  I suppose that those who have this grounding look for evidence in a very orderly way, and I am guilty of this to some extent....today I am interested in those who have addressed thier own perceptual blocks - things that hinder us from experiencing different focus levels and awareness. 

I have read of removing perceptual blocks (mostly through Bruce's work) and discarding outdated or unnecessary beliefs in order to advance our perceptions.  I am quite open to this. 

I am curious, to those of you who have succeeded in removing perceptual blocks and beliefs that hinder us, how it changes your day-to-day existence in our shared reality.

In other words, on an intellectual level, we can discard the block of perception or let our higher self no it is no longer needed.  But how, after doing so, does it affect your day-to-day routine (not just your routine when exploring or in meditation)?

I'm interested, as usual in hearing your own experiences - as I think these have the most weight.....

Best,

Matthew

Losing perceptual blocks.  It happens ALL the time.  In the last four days I have learned that I can listen to my dreams because they are true.  I have also learned - again - that everything is connected.

#1 My sister called me in tears thinking her cat was run over 2 blocks from home after a 2 week search.  My dream the previous evening was about her.  We were flying happily in a balloon over the countryside where we viewed 2 horses in a field by the river.  2 days later, before the cremation, she and several other people (it took that many) determined with great care that it was NOT her cat.  There was a connection between the 2 cats, the 2 horses, the happy dream, and the reality that occurred.  Yes, a cat died, but "our" view of reality was correct in my dream.

#2 I decided to change my forum name.  I took a name which came from "nowhere" in a poem I wrote as a teen.  I decided to look up the name to find out its meaning.  Its meaning is "hope."  I decided I wanted to post a poem for my first post with the new name.  I looked up "hope" on the web and the first entry was a poem by Keats named "To Hope."  It was fitting in every way to describe my entire experience of the moment.  Keats was a large book of poetry I carried around in my teen angst years.  I posted the poem, then posted his birth/death dates.  I looked again for more information.  I found out that I was UNWITTINGLY posting this poem ON his birth date, which was the day of the dead.  

These sorts of experiences REMOVE perceptual blocks and create awareness of the connectedness of ALL things.  Only when we are searching with full awareness will we see this.  It causes me want to open my eyes, all of them, completely.

nadia

One often heres of mystics who see peoples' auras, and such.  My question, I suppose is not how to incorporate PUL into my life, but how were the perceptual blocks removed, and did one suddenly have new perception that lasted  - or was it more subtle.

There is an old Zen dictum that says to effect: "before I studied Zen the mountains were just mountains, the sea was just the sea.  While studying and going on my quest for knowledge, the mountains were no longer mountains they were more, the sea was no longer the sea.    When I reached enlightenment - the mountains were again mountains and the sea was again the sea."


I'm not sure if that helped. 

M

nice thread. my experiences sometimes come from books first. one such book made me feel like I was nothing but a program. hard to accept it, but I was. a program of conficting belief systems. so then after learning this was how it was I took 20 years to experience whether it was true..that I was a robot.

then various experiences happened as I focused in on this idea my mind was programmed. knowing this, I am like Recoverer, who says he is not afraid to die anymore. a great weight has been lifted when fear leaves.  more and more I would follow Bruce's technique learned from his books to engage a belief system and debate it. perceptions of reality lead to a belief system. were my perceptions of reality correct? or incorrect?
If I found I had a perception of being "less than" another whom I compared myself to, then I found I was holding an incorrect perception to limit myself in self expression. if I corrected my perception that the person whom I was comparing myself to, who was more accomplishing, or whom displayed a persona which made me feel "less than" if I corrected myself then there was more PUL in my life and more balanced perspective.
then guidance was there, and seemed guides even took form to become people. I prefer to call them people although non/physical. these guides would slip me phrases sometimes. one day I asked "what is an emotion?" as clearly, have too many emotions. the guides said "emotion is the barometer of spiritual well being." I said "huh?"
It is not that I can disect a feeling and make it scientific and logical in an instant, but not a good thing to ignore feelings either, as they can lead you into your conflicting perceptions which have a strong belief system program attached to them.
I think our society very technical minded, very mental society. would that we could be like the Italians who recognize their feelings to give voice to them..makes for some hilarious living to be more balanced and self expressive within non-judgment of what is good versus what is bad..it is to allow all life forms their expression without condemnation provides a gateway to express PUL. In my disc therefore must live a Jewish Italian grandmother who overfeeds her family with goolashe and which they oblige her because her voice is louder but they are never hungry in her house, perhaps overwieght, but not hungry

getting off topic again. basically, I'm talking about balanced viewpoints...and PUL too.  to percieve correctly I would have to balance the mental areas with the emotional areas, to do that, I would have to respect what I felt. as feelings were in essence, a communication to myself. if I stuffed the feeling, then I stuffed communication. I would have to trust myself then and get over fear of expressing feelings. another way to define this idea is we get first impressions and sometimes this first impression is very correct but we wish to see something else. I would say correct perception is to simply ask another if you are correct or incorrect in your impression and let them create for their own satisfaction to define who they are.

this sort of interplay does create many hilarious and lively conversations...

thanks for coming back here Doc, you make me open up!

For me, PUL, and how it comes from our prime source, is a strong motivation for losing limiting ideas.

Regarding seeing mountains as just mountains, well, I want to see that everything comes from God and is God.  Then I guess, it doesn't matter what you're looking at.

Ah! Golden.

[quote author=laffingrain

guides slipped into my dream state another phrase "when you wish to see only love, you will see only God."

I suppose that my take on the Zen quote of "mountains are again mountains" was that, initially when one is on a spiritual quest, one is wowed by paranormal things like the idea of talking to the dead or magic.  Eventually, when one reaches enlightenment, if it happens in Zen, one lives for the moment, but everything here in C1 reality is, as it was.  The mountains do not appear differently.  They are exactly as they should be.  So we start out on a quest, learn and believe there is going to be an unbelieveable perceptual change that will floor us.  For a while we are floored, but still searching, and when our search is done, we have wisdom - but things in reality appear as they did initially.

Does that make sense?  Did anyone remove blocks to perception and suddenly start seeing things differently all the time in their day-to -day routines?  Apart from the PUL..

Matthew

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Dave mentioned something about an LSD experience where on looking at a plant it was obviously actively manifesting a "suchness" that was missed by most people.  I have experienced this too in small amounts.  And yes, there was one experience with mushrooms where I looked up at a group of trees and the pattern of the branches and leaves was so clearly an active flourish of being that it took my breath away.  How could anyone consider a tree to be an object with such an obvious "suchness" or manifestation of being?  I asked. 

I still feel that way on looking at certain natural formations or events.  Though not perhaps the same as when I was in that state of mind.

Best,

Matthew

Matthew said:  My question, I suppose is not how to incorporate PUL into my life, but how were the perceptual blocks removed, and did one suddenly have new perception that lasted  - or was it more subtle.

My answer: I have NO perceptions that last.  

ALL is fleeting.  I have moments of illumination but they NEVER last.  If I am not searching I am waiting.  If I am not waiting I am bawling my head off for no reason.  If I am not bawling my head off I am laughing.  It's all the same.

nadia

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Peace

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Hi Matthew,

From my perspective there is only one way to remove perceptual blocks and that is to reconnect with our core essence on a conscious level.  Methods to consciously reconnect seem to be numerous and somewhat different for each individual.  The question arises: How did we disconnect from our core in the first place?  We disconnected because we acquired a belief in separation.  I think sometimes this belief begins in the womb, at birth, or perhaps at an early age when some event causes the child to feel separated from the mother… and this belief in separation becomes reinforced throughout life.  It makes sense to me that in order to reconnect with our core essence we need to learn to perceive that there really is no separation and no dualism.

For me this happened in a couple of dramatic ways that probably aren’t what I’d call frequent.  I’ve talked about both of these… my car crash experience where my car went right through another car as though it were jello and also powerful kundalini experiences.  After the first kundalini experience almost 30 years ago, I was able to see auras.  This was probably the most significant change in my perception.  At first these appeared as flashes of light around people and other living things.  People also throw off colored light and interact with each other’s energy fields all the time.  We are constantly interacting with each other on an energetic level.  Everyone can feel this and I also believe that because of the timeframe we’re living in… most everyone can also see auras if they were to look and of course practice learning this skill.  As I practiced, I eventually could see more and more detail.

Much more was happening with me though.  I was beginning to have a deep understanding and a wisdom that I really couldn’t account for.  There was more going on with me than what I could consciously conceive of.  Now years later I can attribute this to having reconnected with my core essence.  This reconnection automatically spiritualizes matter where the egoic personality self becomes so enchanted with the experience of the core essence self that it freely and joyfully surrenders its dominance. 

This allows for our core essence to more fully incarnate and take dominion within all aspects of the egoic personality self and we begin to feel at home within our self.  Probably the most noticeable difference is that we perceive that we have no adversaries because we are in alignment with the spiritual essence of self.  Life is an ongoing experience of observation or being in a state of acceptance when we are fully aligned.  While all can attain spiritual alignment, very few are able to hold this alignment for any constant length of time.  But as a whole, we are learning.

Love, Kathy

I think we can go beyond suffering, definitely, as everyone here has stated.

As Kathy has explained so beautifully it is, however, difficult to hold onto a perfect peace.  This is our human nature.  

We can love this quality in us too, laugh at it sometimes, and learn from it.  Then, we can, in time, cause ourselves less suffering.  This much is true...

nadia

I think that Kathy's experiences were beautifully written and unique for her.  I find that I connect to my core essence or to some extent everything when I am in meditation.  It is during these sessions that I intend to request that certain hindering beliefs be removed which are blocking my perception.

Has anyone done it like this?  Stated an intention/request to have the block removed, and then seen the result?

I think we all have to be more proactive like this, instead of reactive.  Life is a participation activity, and rather than feeling lost and acted upon, I intend to initiate the action!

I'll let you know how it comes out.

Love,

Matthew

 Matthew wrote, Quote:




Quote:


 

The Vanguard is here, and they're ready to roll...  Soon in a few years Pluto will be moving into the testing sign Capricorn the sign of big business, big politics-government, big money, and overall economy...and Pluto brings upheavals... Even before this Pluto will be conjuncting the Galactic Center point at different points...  Ought to be some interesting times...indeedily.

Justin said:
Being a people oriented person (though impersonal), i've often wondered, could i just say goodbye to it all, and go to a mountain or forest and live completely by myself and not be dependant on anything civilized, or any person and yet still be completly happy?  And then bring back this tempered self to give self away in service and only "care" about this with no thought of my own desires and yet still be completely happy?

I think the motivation in this idea is admirable, Justin. If this is your desire, to simply live in compassion 100% of the time, I admire you.  I do think that, for all of us, our desires, whatever they may be, are what lead us to knowledge.  The type of buddhism my mother practices acknowledges desires and encourages them.    Certainly we should not run willy nilly after them aimlessly but they are a source of inspiration and motivation for us, are they not?  Perhaps you are wise to set your goals high.  

Personally, my path is a little disorderly...oh, well!!!!!

But anyway...I am presently working with a meditation cd which states clearly that the universe does not judge our desires.  However, the meditation does connect me with a universal "source" and keeps me on a particular "path" on the way, which, I believe, keeps the meditation on a level which is positive.

nadia

Confession to make! (And in doing so I am coming out of the closet, so to speak)

Reading the original post I have to reply back to front as it were.

I had no previous interest in nor wanted anything to do with anything spiritual until I came across a native american healer around April this year.

My life has since turned upside down and I now live to the best of my ability within the experiences I learned...Which is now a life of giving and compassion in both a professional and personal role.

One massive awakening in the most extreme scenario that lasted for about 4 months has led to my concrete belief that something positively exists.

It all happened in one fell swoop!. At first I was too "awakened" and in a position that I would dearly love to attain again to worry about my mental stability. The whole thing was so complete and everything was visible and completely comprehendable, so much so that that everything was known, to the amazement of all who know me to the point where nothing was invisible and anything enquired by anyone was answered with complete accuracy to any question put to me. In this the consensus was that I was not insane but something strange had happened!....Everything about me changed, my life changed...others around me were getting wierd things happening to them too...At this point I could not touch anyone as it was as if I had some sort of massive power that could transfer through my hands....(I did touch a few people and miracles took place..)Then I started to worry about my sanity because I started to question the things that were happening to me and others around me. Most of all I worried about this native american healer. I was in full blown telepathy, not only that but he would appear almost like a purple hologram, and not only that but things were appearing that he sent from from over 3,000 miles away (yes real physical things that he told me he would send, that duly arrived) At this time my chakra's, which I had never heard of or knew about before were firing at full blast, also there seemed to be a brilliant white light that shone directly through me, also my meditations (which I had suddenly learned how to do and was spending around 12 hours a day doing) were more real than what had been my normal life before....These meditations were turning out to be the most amazing "ultra reality" events that were having real effects in my daily life...During this time I went to a spiritual retreat for a week-end (a very respected one of world reknown) and there this new magical world I had entered re-confirmed it's existence. At this point due to my belief by now that I had gone psychotic or was dilusional, (as by now I was behaving and pretending for all the world as if nothing undue was happening in my life and not saying a word to a living soul) I searched for the proof of the reality of my experiences.
Eventually I told this native american healer that I considered this as abuse. He was very sad as he seemed to think it was a very special gift he had shared with me, but I insisted that due to my fear of loosing my sanity that I translated it as abuse. He slowly left me over the course of the following week, leaving sad little tokens all over the place until eventually I am where I am today, with no power at all, not even the ability to meditate anymore.
At first I searched like an obsessed bloodhound to find the sense in it all. To find my madness in order to heal it. Now I look back in the cold light of day with all the searching of that time over.

My conclusion is now concrete to me. It took a long time to decide as I will only accept absolute truth. If it cannot be proved, it is not true. There is so much that can be proved. My life has changed completely. I know all this stuff is real and I was very fortunate to have been able to experience it. I would love to experience it again and in my own way I am trying. Should it ever happen again, the next time I would be prepared and know how to handle it. It was "The Full Monty", and all I can say is "It's Awsome".........

Sorry it was so long, I'm not good at expressing myself well.

Love to you all

wshtoyou

Recoverer I'm so glad you wrote back as I have a feeling that you know what I'm talking about...

Prehaps I am afaid of my higher self?

Prehaps I am just plain scared of what I am capable of?

Already one little step at a time is reaping huge rewards not just to myself but to others so desperatley almost incomprehensibly in need...?

It's a huge responsibility, and I've been known to get it wrong...but, but, there is so much more....This is all new to me and it's scary...!

At times nothing is there, at others it explodes like "A Champaigne Super Nova"...

Ain't life incredible if you let it!

any guidance appreciated

wshtoyou

Recoverer I love you too..

It really is that simple is'nt it!

Just let myself be guided by my higher self, one little step at a time.

Right is intrinsic in the higher self as all is somehow known. The art is to know it, be aware and be guided by it.

Will try to keep on target and not go catapulting about in all directions.

I think it's called faith, faith in what cannot be seen and yet is understood.....

Keeping in touch with that higher self...

thanks, and thanks....

Hi fellow questioners,

Getting back to Matthew’s request for personal experiences regarding removal of perceptual blocks and beliefs that hinder us.

I’m finding that using the dialogues on this board to be of great help in bursting perceptual blocks to allow acceptance and PUL to flow more easily.  I’m referring to the simple interactions between individuals and the various ways people present themselves.  Take for example, WF’s changing pictures to reflect her individuality or mood.  Do I sense within myself a feeling of betrayal when she does this and say how dare she. She is so wrong for changing the fixed image I have of her. Do I question my feeling of being betrayed and proceed to recognize my belief that she is breaking the rules and attack her for this? Or do I take this a bit further and question my gut reaction and than examine it only to find that it is only some dumb personal belief the my ego is clinging to and let this belief go.  As a result, my tunnel vision opens a little wider to the possibility that she maybe taught me, not only about my own biased beliefs but also that I have the freedom to play too. 

Whew, that was hard work but let’s up the stakes a bit more.  Now what if she chooses to continue the game by giving herself a whole new name on the board and post using a completely different style just to project and play with another expression of her personal beliefs.  Would my ego again not allow me to applaud her in her creativity?  Would I again let my belief that it is breaking the rules, take over and feel betrayed, or could I be able to let the system crash begin by letting go of my ego and let the fun begin. 

For me, it’s a process of interacting with each other on an ongoing basis that helps me to access the subconscious through my emotions to burst the ego to open myself more and to hopefully access my higher self.  That’s the one that is not dealing with a set of beliefs that the ego has a full time job protecting to keep the status quo.  That’s my core self which can see through the persona, the fear, and the others so called weird/wrong actions to the core self.  But all I have to do is set my ego on the shelf when someone else’s words or actions ruffle this birds feathers, thingy an ear to my gut, question what am I afraid which is preventing me from celebrating the other, listen to the possibilities then just let that sucker (the ego) go.  No easy task and sometimes it hurts and since I can’t know ahead of time, nor do I want to, I like surprises, in which direction the teachings will come to get rid of my ego blocks just to have the perks that recoverer described.  It can be scary, this changing my mind about someone or a dearly held belief.  Of course in some instances, I use other methods described, but I still find that being on the front line by interacting with the people around me like those on this board to be the most educational/experiential belief crasher.

Cooze remember in the words of that Great phellersofer, DocM, “This, above all, I feel is true. That through meditation, relaxation, playful interactions with each other, we should experiment and learn to connect.”  Sorry Matthew, I’m gonna’ use this quote to death because I love it so-but I’ll always give you credit. Thanks for the thread which allowed me to put my two cents in on another day off from work.

Love to all, Jean

Thank you for the feedback laffingrain.

recoverer,

You bet there's a better inner way and it includes all the special glimpes we get, all the help from or non-physical/physical guides, and the changes in our attitude which lead us to wonderful growth but sometimes it's those little things/situations/intereactions that we get the best insight into the beliefs which are limiting. Like the traffic thing. I play a little game learned from ACIM regarding being held up in traffic and not having a clue to what is laying far ahead. Instead of getting pist now I imagine that I am being held back from maybe getting involved in an accident and be danged, I've often passed one that happened that I might have been in had I been there sooner. Then with the drivers who obviously are a problem on the road and not going with the flow, sometimes I imagine if I'm taking care of them by staying behind them.  Silly little games that have replaced road rage and caused me to feel closer to guidence and more of a protecter of fellow man on the road.  Change of perspective and attitude is all it took.

Love, Jean

Jkeyes:

Yeah, I guess as long as we have ideas to lose, the World will point them out to us in various ways.

I've had similar thoughts while being stuck in traffic.

I haven't read ACIM. Does it say anything about higher self/disc/I-there? Or something similar.


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Jean,

I like your posts - you have a balanced view of things.  I sense that you were a firebrand in your heydey, with a strong spirit, and that you didn't take any nonsense from people.  That's a plus in my book.

I don't think PUL expression means that we can't lose our cool or have occasional road rage.  Its part of being human.  Perhaps enlightened souls like Gandhi or Mother Teresa could continually turn the other cheek, but I'm still not convinced that we must suppress our negative emotions in order to "graduate" to a higher plane of being.  You are diffusing the anger by realizing your influences and that there are alternatives to blowing a fuse.  I'm not sure, but I don't think expressing PUL means never being angry.  That seems a bit BSy to me, like that line in the movie Love Story from the 70s "love is never having to say you're sorry."

I suppose that gets to the heart of this thread.  If beliefs block our perceptions and we lose them, let them go, we must fundamentally change, but we are still ourselves.  I am Matthew.  I have likes and dislikes. I may get annoyed, happy or sad.  I may in reality be a form of the creator fooling myself by assuming I am separate and experiencing love, hardship and inspiration in an effort to bring it all back to my creator/me.  I should therefore not deny these emotions because my rational mind understands that expressing PUL is a higher way of being.

Bruce and others say that to experience higher planes of existence, to focus our concentration, we must lose outdated beliefs.  I know several veterans on this board have done so, and I appreciate everyone's input on how that changed their lives afterward,

Peace,

Matthew

The question is interesting but the comments seem a little bit of frosting.

One way to get perceptual changes is to just think and be logical. But if you try to live the logical results you will probably find yourself at perceptual odds with your fellow beings.

I think the main way most people get perceptual changes is to go through some crisis. Then you have to learn to live again in the consensus world. If you don't expect a hurricane to be bad but it floods all your stuff and washes it away, then you've got several levels of change to deal with. The shock of the initial rush of water, the loss of possessions, and then the new knowledge that yes hurricanes can be bad. What does Bruce call it? A belief system breakdown? That's what changes perceptions.

Can that be done in slow motion? Perhaps. People who join AA are advised to go to as many meetings as possible. That is because it takes hard work to changes some perceptions. It is a technique that can work for other things.

But whe things change for me, the hardest part is that I usually can't share the new reality with someone who hasn't been there.

old saying probably alchemical-

The eye is more inclined to see what is behind it than what is in front of it.

I guess tha means, to change perception, change what is behind the eye.

Hi Mandy,

         ( I have a secret wish for you, but i won't tell you cuz you told me not too)

          today I : shopped for succulents, went to garage sales, played and sang blues & gospel, practiced the pea & shell game (an old con game, kinda the 'chess' of sleight -of-hand), spent time with the cats, sat in meditation... what's that burning? oh, i'm cooking dinner too!....and then i made secret wish... for you.


                Love to you friend,
                                               tim

Hi Mandy,

I always remember November 5 as that was my parent's wedding anniversary. They're on the other side but I'm sure they're celebrating...........ah yes, I can see them............70 years since they got married. And still just as much in love as the day they were married.

What did I do today?  Not much really. I watched a videotape that Vicky sent me on Mediums, a program that was on A&E. I took my dog Spirit out a few times in the rain. The snow has about 100 feet more to go before coming downtown here.   And of course I was on the computer too much as usual. I washed dishes, watched some TV and know that tomorrow will be a great day as they all are. And I have love in my heart for everyone.

Blessings, Mairlyn

I played with this koan the early part of the week as a diversion from work stuff and to formulate a response, which I thought would include my “inalienable right to experience all my emotions including anger” paper-which I never posted and then relate it to C1, perceptual blocks, and ultimately-retrievals. But instead wound up reporting experiences that are happening in my C1 world that are sort of bringing these things out anyway.  I do apologize up front for the boring tale and seemingly meandering path I needed to take to tie my beliefs, action, and results to this thread and then relate it to the purpose of the board.  So those of you who are interested, please bare with me.  As for others, just stroll on by.  I take no offense.   

Day 1:To begin, Thursday morning, my husband seemed ok enough after attempting to clear his system of medications added after a long stint of just trying to acquire the pills he was already prescribed so he could stabilize, I went to work as usual.  On the way home from work, driving with my arm out the window because the evening was balmy, I suddenly noticed that my engagement ring was missing and thought, Oh carp (censors), it must have slipped off onto the road and I guess I can, “kiss that sucker Goodbye”.  Then I thought, I wonder if this indicates that my husband will be leaving soon?”  When I got home, the front door was open which, I interpreted from past experiences, as his attempt to welcome me but he wasn’t there.  Instead he was sitting on the couch in a bit of a stupor.  Throughout the evening, I watched as he lost more and more of his mobility and awareness but I had hoped it would pass because I had one more day of work before the weekend. 

Day 2:He moaned throughout the night but got up with me in the morning and seemed right enough so I left.  You know the torn loyalties dilemma-Do I go to work or care for family.  Being still very concerned, I called him in the afternoon and he responded with the right words but I sensed that he was still not really there.  He has the habit, when he wants you not to engage him, to tell you what he thinks you want to hear so that you will leave him alone.   When I got to work, the receptionist came up to me with my ring taped to a piece of paper (Miracle #1 sets the stage).  On it was written a note about finding the ring and it was signed by one of the night cleaning crew.  Now you have to understand that the cleaning crew consists of individuals, who are clients of MH agency, which I work for, some of whom go through the C.M.s desks looking for valuables.  Three months ago, someone in the night crew swiped all the bus passes stored in desks for the clients use.  But this wonderful individual returned to me not only the ring but also the possibility of my husband deciding to stay a bit longer. 
 
But, still, I did not look forward to arriving home Friday night to possibly finding my worst fears confirmed.  They were for my husband’s condition had further deteriorated as he had actually spent most of the day in bed and had answered my call on his cell phone stating that I caught him after he was just going back to bed and excused himself by stating that he was partially asleep.  He was verging on delirium, not really knowing what was going on, still moaning and not able to control his body and shivering. He couldn’t figure out if he had to go to the bathroom or not and when he attempted to go he had trouble sitting and then when he was seated, he couldn’t urinate or remember why he was there.  That old fear radiation started to rise within me and I demand that he explain what was going on.  And of course he couldn’t so I started getting back in touch with the love exercise.

Flipping ahead to day Day 3: Now what does all this have to do with perceptual blocks and belief systems?  This morning, while my husband was still sleeping, I went back to working on the perceptual block thread and reread Bruce’s chapter on “The Perceiver & Interpreter, Components of Consciousness” in the guidebook.  He defines the Perceiver’s role as one of “observation” and this, “…information comes into our subconscious awareness as impressions, intuitions, thoughts, feelings, images, sounds, sensations, ideas, a sense of knowing, etc.” and the Interpreters role is to bring, “…what is observed to conscious awareness” which, “…is always done within the context of our beliefs, our language, and our pre-existing memories” to access the Perceivers information.

Basically my husband and I are having a typical C1 experience.  Road rage is also a C1 experience much like what is happening to my husband in that many of us get the point of being aware of the perceiver, subconscious awareness, but stop at the point of interpreter to realize that we can make a choice as to how to react.  We allow the perceiver to dictate our actions.  By the way, in my neck of the woods, if you respond to the urge of retaliating to an obnoxious driver, you risk being shot at.  Anyhow, when we work to understand the interpreter’s role in C1, IMO, we are more able to, not only recognize blocks in our perception, but to use it to change our minds to express love energy in C1, aside from being able, as Bruce says, to use it to remember the retrieval experiences, and be more effective in the various other focus levels. 

The last time my husband experienced this toxicity, 4 years ago, he lost all memory of his inability to function shortly after he recovered although it actually still lives in his “state specific memory”.  I think this is an example of Bruce’s SSM concept when he explains “click out” as an experience that our interpreter has no reference points with which to relate the experience or that a person would have to go back to that state to recall it which, IMO, might also be a mechanism for blocking unpleasant memories.  It too might be the reasons why some keep using illegal drugs and, as Bruce points out, the limitations of doing so. “Hey Man, I had the most beautiful insight, feelings, visuals, etc. last night but I just can’t remember them or re-experience them without using- fill in the blank!!!”

Anyhow, my husband simply does not remember how sick he was and he wants to keep it that way.  At any rate, during that experience, which is similar to this one, his perceiver was constantly expressing his discomfort but the interpreter was not working.  He couldn’t state his thoughts, feelings, sensations, or anything else regarding what was going on internally or what he needed me to do to assist him.  Meanwhile my perceiver was working over time in the fear area and I had trouble engaging my interpreter to assist me in knowing what action to take, I panicked, and took him to the VA emergency, which resulted in no real benefit except for the memory of it being no real benefit.  But this time it was different for me because of my increased ability to access my interrupter in combo with increased confidence in using the love exercise and the other exercises during the interim.  In other words, having the beliefs, which include to power of love and using Bruce’s exercises as opposed to allowing my fear or feelings of being “put upon” to take over created a more positive outcome.    


Getting back to Day 2, upon arriving at home last night, after another difficult day at work and finding further deterioration in my husband’s struggle with toxicity, and then struggling with feelings of tiredness and impatience versus how much I loved him and attempting to use Bruce’s love exercise, I became overwhelmed.  At this point I stopped everything and appealed to a higher source/whatever for help and then suddenly the whole atmosphere changed.  (Miracle #2 enters) I calmed and my husband stopped moaning. He was then able to work with me to get him dressed in warm clothing and he drank that liquid, which he always says will rust your pipes, and therefore avoids like the plague (water) and kept saying how good it tastes.  He was able to ask for help when he needed to urinate with no leaking all over the floor or clothes because I remembered to a bottle instead of the toilet.  My problem solving abilities started to kick in.

Meanwhile, after the atmosphere change, I got enough of a break to go to the computer but before I got on line, the phone rang and I answered it. I have only one line in and I rarely answer the house phone due to the sales calls.  The caller was an old friend who shares my Monroe/Moen interests calling to remind me that she is now in my town and wants to continue our former conversations, especially since she is remarried recently to a peer who’s also in his 70’s, and to include him in our afterlife interests since he does a lot of “work” at night (Miracle #3 happens).   

Friday night my husband slept till 2:30 am.  I was able to help him easily to relieve himself without the long trek to the bathroom and provide him with some more of that wonderful elixir (water) to flush additional medication out of his system.  He awoke a few more times and I assisted him but he mostly slept soundly, no moans, just a few, “Oh dears” and we chuckled a little when I added, “what can the matter be?” (lines from an old song).

Day 3, Saturday he woke at 11am to urinate on his own and take the birds out for their airing.  He enjoyed more glasses of water and stated that he feels more like his old self (Miracle #4 starting). He’s slowly coming back to me, cried about how much he loves me, ate a little food, cried about how delicious his milk with ice tasted, (he’s a sentimental guy), and is sleeping again as the afternoon passes. But early this evening, it appears that he is back where he was last night soon after the atmosphere change and the crisis is once again upon us and went to bed again.  In attempting to go to the bathroom, he sat then got up and wet all over the floor in front of him and when I went to get him clean underwear I asked him what I had in my hands and he responded with pajamas and maintained this response.  Needles to say, I started to get hysterical again but was able to remember how much I loved this dear man no matter what was meant to be.  He then went back to bed till I woke him up at 8pm to watch the British shows; he ate some of my sandwich and continued to watch TV till he went to bed at ten.  I’ll see what happens tomorrow.   

My point is that, in struggling to maintain the mind frame where PUL can more easily be recognized and sought after, we do indeed have the power to affect our C1 environment and sometimes achieve immediate and dramatic results.  Monroe’s reference to learning to master the (M) field, especially concerning love in the “here” and “there”, and Bruce’s love energy exercises along with other positive exercises help a lot.  So does distinguishing the purposes of perception and interpretation to work with the subconscious to deliberately remove perceptual blocks in the “here” and “there” focus levels as well.  And by being aware of all these concepts and playing around with them, we can recognize how much more we are than our physical bodies and how much actual positive power we really have. 

Day 4: Sunday morning he was up with me by 6am after an uneventful night, had some coffee, and started to make plans for writing out checks to pay the bills.  I pointed to his underwear and asked him what they were?  He responded with, “my underpants, of course”.  I then questioned him regarding the shows we saw last night and he remembered all the details and chuckled again over some of the scenes.  He’s back with the living as far as I’m concerned but we’ll take it slowly.  He’s back in bed again.  Meanwhile I’m rereading Bruce’s tale about PUL, “the glue that keeps sticking” in chapter 30, VtCF regarding the probe returning to the creator, being unconditionally loved which included “all parts of itself” and rereading ACIM’s section on Miracles to keep myself on track while I wait.       

As you can tell, drifting between living, reading, and practicing what I read, that I believe that I am effecting my environment.  Whether C1 is “real” or what I believe is true or not is beside the point. We do live our lives as best we can but I also see that, as I intentually practice exercises outlined by various readings including those of ACIM, Monroe, and Bruce, I’m experiencing less stress in my physical world than I did in the past and more fun in using my imagination.  This is happening in spite of my situation getting more intense due to aging processes in my husband, experiencing increased demands at work due to the ever-increasing MH funding crunch, and the added panic in my clients due to recent earth “disasters”. As an added bonus, I’m hoping to be better skilled and more effective as a retriever on the other focus levels and to, not only be able to meet at the crystal on November 12, but remember it.

Now another dilemma arises-should I post or not-to be or not to be that is the question! Yeah-I’m going for it!

Hi guys, you sure help me to pass time as I wait for my husband to recover.  Thanks for being here there and everywhere!

Love, Jean
                    

Jean, you certainly are affecting of your environment as you're affecting me for certain with your last post, putting me into alpha state.

I'm reminded of relationships with my mother and with my deceased husband when I read your post. I'm reminded of what ACIM taught me that "its all about relationship" to one another, or to family, then to greater family, wherein greater family includes strangers then. all of my relationships used to seem quite strange, just until the stranger became family too. I have a cute story concerning when my 83 yr old mother came to live with me so we could have a chance to mend the relationship of 20 years of virtual silence between us. u will pardon my ramblings here I hope; I try to stay on topic, its difficult. suffice it to say it's difficult being in a physical body that seems to be falling apart and your mother refuses to wear underwear and your the one elected to clean up, and btw, mom, why did it take you 20 years to get here so we could work this out? ??? she wore a halo for sure, and yes I was proud of her too and discovered I did love her after all. I wasn't sure at first. we had 4 generations of women for awhile under the same roof of consciousness. me, my daughter, my mother, and my deceased grandmother hovering over the three of us all the while, and she rules! love her too, and couldn't hardly remember speaking to her in physical reality. she had the overview the 3 of us lacked. I was just amazed how it seems once you take off the body, you can become instant mentor to an Earthling even though she had left this world in a diabetic coma.
Nanny was working it. she would help mend the relationship between my mother and I which had lain silent all those years. mom was a spunky woman who didn't know how bad she smelled, probably because she had lost her sense of smell as well as her ability to hold urine. the thing about mom was to find her good points if I wanted to have a relationship as well a closure on all the hurt had gone before. to get to the forgiveness. at age 83 this woman soon had a booming business in my living room sewing for people. where did all these people come from? and why were some of them telling me I was lucky to have her? she even managed between heart attacks to alter somebodys wedding dress, get sewing machine grease all over the front of it, and they still paid her and didn't complain; they didn't return with more sewing in this case, but they didn't complain. out in front of my house she sold fruit putting the rotten part on the bottom and still the town crowded around her for a chance to see her working it in action and to view this halo around her, they would eat whatever she told them to eat. she felt bad about my lousy childhood she said. I told her forget it, but she still continued to feel guilty. she was emersed in the life review process and nanny was working on her to remember and to forgive herself. mom would tell me what nanny said in her dream. once nanny perked her up to say "I'm proud of you!" she told me this, it made her day. when hearing about nanny saying this I realized I was saying it too! I just had not said it out loud.
I guess I admire people who refuse to die after 3 heart attacks and keep working up to the end. I just wish they would wear underwear and stop driving when the law says to stop driving. her main philosophy to get her thru life is "ya take the good with the bad" and you forgive others a trillion times like the bible says, or as many times as it takes." then she huffed away from me as if to say, I'd never understand about forgiveness. but I would.

then I think how much love is between you and your husband. it reminds me I didn't know how much I loved my own until he checked out. then I got whomped with the message that I was gonna carry on alone. actually he had to come back to tell me I wasn't helping his own situation the way I was carrying on emotionally and stuffing the grief. he came to unplug me from the grief. it was powerful and I'm still not sure how he accomplished that, i guess men are just too darn logical for me to ignore. we got our miracles to talk about. and seems in this day and age miracles will become commonplace and for me, it all starts with "I wish to see this differently, please help me see this differently."
then we can begin. love you very much Jean. I am going to look you up as soon as I'm dead. hope u don't mind me dropping in on you!

Getting back to changes due to belief changes...
(wrote this earlier)
What is interesting to me in this thread, is to see how much real
learning has been taking place, in spite of all the confusion and
uncertainty in the new material. That is, we still all have
somewhat different philosophies, but the level is much higher now.
The details are unsettled, but the overall difference is huge.
I have had doubts about bringing new ideas to people, but I see
that quite a few of us have been able to handle that and move to a
higher level of overall understanding, in spite of perplexing
things we have been exposed to.

For myself, I have the calmness of knowing that my soul will go on.
I actually believe that if a 50 mile wide asteroid came in here, I
would continue on, and my knowledge and experience would continue
to grow. I assume there are a million planets out there where I
could continue, although it would be different from Earth.

I find I do not get as emotional about seeming fate. I know what I
can control and what I do not expect to be able to control. I have
a fair picture of how much of my reality I create, and what I am
not responsible for. I can more easily shrug and say, that is just
life, and I expect some of that as part of the deal. I know that
when one door closes, another will open, and the flow of life will
continue. Also, I know that various levels of life high or low, are
acceptable so long as they constitute learning experiences.

My sense of guilt has been refined, and I don't carry a lot of
guilt about things that went wrong in exploratory experiences.
A greater variety of experience can be deemed acceptable. All I
expect of myself is that I use the knowledge that I have available
at the time.

Boris,

Your super-glad to hear from you! Yes we're all all growing at our own speed in our own way on this board and hopfully finding a bit more peace in the knowlege that, indeed. when we leave here we won't dissappear and even possibly meet again and remember the meeting. 

And for those of you who believe that you will dissappear, you will, but only for a short while because odds are that you'll be found and brought to what you would call home. Maybe even by Boris!

Love, Jean