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thinking of what death was like for sis (Read 5212 times)
LaffingRain
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thinking of what death was like for sis
Sep 22nd, 2005 at 6:48pm
 
my sis was full of anger upon transistion; she lashed out at every family member disowning them at the time, if she had not already disowned them previously. her husband turned away even at her bedside to seek love within the arms of another. for only love matters. and it should matter at most especially transistion time. but we forget. we forget to be kind sometimes. it was sad. I could not bear it. I was not even physically there at her transistion. I had been disowned years before. now she had this karmic tie to me and would come for my forgiveness. I could not forgive on the spot as she floated within my field still with her bitteress to express. I would deal with her when I was strong enough. I was not strong yet. I simply shouted at her YOU WANTED ALL THE LOVE IN THIS LIFE JOAN! and in this way I was expressing myself that she had failed to gain spiritually in her short 38 years and the cancer had eaten her body...she had been yanked back into the spiritual regions where she would continue her life and try to learn generosity and kindness. she did have her best friend with her on this trip to me...I was momentarily lifted and gratified, she did not travel alone. her husband later went to her begging forgiveness for his indiscretions...she had had enough of him and refused to talk to him. on the other side I later learned she had a new beau. we had reached a sort of truce and forgiven each other, for it is life and life only, but one journey out of countless others we may take. if only people knew of the adventurous aspects of dying! what a delightful experience is death, a return to a familiar landscape where flight as a bird takes place! where the only rule of thumb is what shall I do with my time? how shall I make a new intention, and where shall I attend school? and shall I return to Earth and who shall I be then? so there is no need to be sad, it is but rebirth and not a dark night to rile against, to go into...we shall fall into the arms of our loved ones to remember them, to exclaim how we forgot to remember our former lives, but now we see all and understand all.
and the funny thing is our capacity to die before we've died! talking about ego death, the thing that is self protective and contains a bunch of belief systems which create a false self image...love to each and every one of you, for you are all me too! alysia
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... Who takes away death's sting deprives life of bitterness
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LightR_on
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #1 - Sep 23rd, 2005 at 4:48am
 
You know Alysia, I was going to post on another thread about this very issue.

Through my life I too have been confronted by souls locked in the darkness of selfishness, they can not see beyond there own needs, the only thing on there minds is,how dose it affect me or whats in it for me.This selfishness can take many forms,but at its darkest it has not one thought for another only for its self.Many here on mother earth suffer this affliction.

We are here in the process of learning to balance ourselves,most souls following a spiritual path are looking to serve,we reach out our hands in gesture, as to say come to me I will save you, I will take away your pain.The problem for us is this thing called balance,we forget to save ourselves and in so doing we forget to value ourselves we have no boundaries.From this we are easy targets,until we get the lesson.Now what could the universe be showing us sending souls that are so self orientated to us.

Balance is having boundaries, its knowing when enough is enough.That if a soul just takes and takes there is a problem with this soul.be it sister brother lover or child.When we stand tall and say enough I have given enough, our lesson is completed and then there lesson commences. What a wonderful system we get our balance back and they begin to grow from someone maybe the first one saying no.

For, forgiveness to take place there has to be one key eliminate and that key is to acknowledge our own part, to own that we allowed these things to take place. No one can take from you what you weren't willing to give. Then once we take responsibility for our part we can then forgive. And then through this forgiveness we understand that the soul is still growing and may not as yet  have turned to the light. But as with all thing eventually the soul will turn to the light, as my higher self once told me in the end they all come to the light.

Your journey with your sister, is one way you are still showing her your love. When this meeting took place I can assure you ,you where merged with your higher self this is where the power came from in your words. The higher self was trying to guide her and gave you the Divine blessing, of  seeing how these things work.
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LaffingRain
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #2 - Sep 23rd, 2005 at 1:38pm
 
yes thank you Lights...I need this. truly I did. I know all relationships are important here. the higher self must have spoke the truth...yet I was so angry and saw anger as a bad thing. maybe anger is not always bad? I just believed in her, she had given me a little love here and there as a child. I expected her to do so well...it seemed I referred to another life with her, somewhere else, another time, that blew me away because I really consider reincarnation not a subject for me to think much about...ACIM says it really doesn't matter one way or the other. but yet I did say "in this life".   so I consider some other part of me lives with her, in some other dimension. therefore I must be but a fraction of myself as I speak to you here. we can be glad then that we humans are much more than what it seems on the surface. as Lucy said in another thread, we cannot see each other's faces, or tone of voice or barely discern all the nuances of human expression from posting on a forum. we but scratch the surface here to share.
Sis did come to speak with me again, many years later to relate the reason she disowned me. she said I felt better than her. I agreed, but tried to explain that before I felt better than her, I first felt much inferior to her bubbling personality (at that time) and so I donned the attitude I was better than her as a defense mechanism. we seemed to come to a truce of understanding then. I asked her what she was up to..she said she tended abused horses on the other side, this was the way she got in touch with her lovingness once more..as she had tended horses and trained them all her life. I thought it was a beautiful occupation and something I might like to do someday also....I know she's growing away from the place of bitterness that she had been in when she left this world. as I had one more visit with her, with her new friend following close behind her. I continue to learn things about my family blood ties as I go along. thanks for your response, it helped me understand things. love, alysia
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LaffingRain
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #3 - Sep 23rd, 2005 at 5:54pm
 
You know Alysia, I was going to post on another thread about this very issue.
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Lights, I wanted to mention something very synchronistic is happening on the board, what I want to call the collective mind here, don't know if more than you and I and Vicky and Ryan are tuning into the collective consciousness here but it amazes me, that it's not just me. that you say above, you were going to post on this subject is what I mean about the collective area..same thing happened with Vicky here, and I beat her to it! not that I'd mind someone else post what I want to say....very much appreciate what happens here..
I decided your post was running thru my head today after I already responded, it was still inside of me and I came back for a 2nd read and glad I did as it really is profound what you are saying and just what this board needed my humble opinion. I mean, you pegged me right on! you must be into psychology, or spiritual psychology, not everyone here is into that.
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We are here in the process of learning to balance ourselves,most souls following a spiritual path are looking to serve,we reach out our hands in gesture, as to say come to me I will save you, I will take away your pain.The problem for us is this thing called balance,we forget to save ourselves and in so doing we forget to value ourselves we have no boundaries.From this we are easy targets,until we get the lesson.Now what could the universe be showing us sending souls that are so self orientated to us.
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right. self oriented. yes, I take too much on myself, always have..I understand this perfectly that this is my question to myself.
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Balance is having boundaries, its knowing when enough is enough.That if a soul just takes and takes there is a problem with this soul.be it sister brother lover or child.
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yes, agreed. balance is important. I see scales everywhere which measure balance. i think of emotional balance, my energy within balance. yes, I never knew when I had had enough. I understand boundaries, for when my children were teenagers, I set one boundary they must not cross; they must never cuss at me disrespectfully no matter how much they felt justified (teenagers!) arg!! it was kind of like the last straw when that started up and when I said NO! it quit! ha ha! of course you don't know how many decimals of energy I had to raise my voice to to get their attention.
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When we stand tall and say enough I have given enough, our lesson is completed and then there lesson commences.
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yes, this happened between mom and I. I died to the relationship, actually went obe while I was dying to it. i had given everything I could and I was bone dry. then it was up to her.
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What a wonderful system we get our balance back and they begin to grow from someone maybe the first one saying no.
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yes, we define where to draw the line, how much abuse is enough abuse? only the person can decide, then that causes a shift, a change in focus. I'm writing this down because it's my journey and I thought maybe someone else could relate and I'm so glad you wrote this post!
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For, forgiveness to take place there has to be one key eliminate
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I think u meant key element
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and that key is to acknowledge our own part, to own that we allowed these things to take place. No one can take from you what you weren't willing to give. Then once we take responsibility for our part we can then forgive.
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yes, the hard part is owning you create your own reality, your own circumstances by perhaps reacting. the main thing is not to shift the blame to someone else..then forgiveness, or to give as before the upset, is possible. the church used to call this repenting. but I like taking responsibility instead and not blaming others better to think of it that way.
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And then through this forgiveness we understand that the soul is still growing and may not as yet  have turned to the light. But as with all thing eventually the soul will turn to the light, as my higher self once told me in the end they all come to the light.
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yes, we all do, I believe this, that all roads will meet in a common area, the light. but not all can believe this as it implies we are all equal. I think we are all equal, but each of on a different page of our own book.
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you are kind to respond to my post with such precision and insight. I know some of us put in a lot of time on such a board, and the time you have taken to help me see what I now see more clearly than ever, is much appreciated! love and light, it will return to you, your gift, if I have to personally deliver it! love, alysia

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LightR_on
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #4 - Sep 23rd, 2005 at 8:52pm
 
Thank you Alysia, you are very kind, your gentleness shines through all that you write.

As I travel the passages of time through the astral plane, I have seen many many times the collective grouping of our souls together,these groupings are endless they happen with everyone we have contact with ,even here on this board we meet and discuss all that passes over into this reality. I have seen entire posts with pictures and full text roll past me through my  astral connection.

The collective consciousness that we are all a part of ,(even those who would deny such be in existence ),is real , Synchronisity shows us this reality exists. When we are ready we will be reconnected to all that is,as the planet shifts into her full transition those who are ready  will be reconnected.This is why we are having greater awareness of the synchronistic nature of our existence. As we awaken and reconnect there is much to be faced and at this time most souls higher selves are slowly getting there grounded aspects used to the idea there is so much more than meets the eye going on.

Love is the key

Love to you Alysia
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LaffingRain
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #5 - Sep 23rd, 2005 at 11:25pm
 
Lights said:  Cheesy I have seen entire posts with pictures and full text roll past me through my  astral connection.
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ok!!! Wink  we are all different what we see, feel, pick up. now I have rarely seen pictures concerning this board and text roll by, <but> a phenonmenon is occuring that I can <hear> a post as it's being written either by me, or another thread! then I sometimes come here to find the topic already underway..I'm like trying to brush my teeth or feed the dog and this entire dialogue is going on in my head, and I'm saying, wow, that was an excellent word combination for that idea, etc ect.
or Vicky or Ryan or Mike or somebody will say, yea, I saw you last nite in my obe or my dream and I'll say well, I guess I get around a lot...lol...maybe because I think about the others a lot and it's reaching them inside the collective areas.
yes, it's exciting the shift in consciousness, there is a lot more going on under the surface than meets the eye, for sure!...
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #6 - Sep 24th, 2005 at 12:29am
 
You know Alysia,

Along time ago I was in a conversation with someone on a broad,  just like we are .
We this other person and I where talking about our experiences in the astral plane. She was telling me how many of her dreams where in cartoon form.Well being as I am, I'm one of those people who needs proof, been down the road of believing everything I was told and now I have a healthy more balanced perspective, one that has a little skepticism added to it.

So she was telling me that she dreamed in cartoons, I thought to myself shore you do! or the other word you know the one starts with a b'.Thats never happened to me,that night my guides organized a little show for me, one in cartoon form,they like to play with me you know.I woke up in the morning and said to myself,OK she dose dream in cartoons.

As you have said there are different programs or should I say different gifts for every soul . Maybe this girl liked cartoons and in that form her guides could communicated many things to her. For me I don't like cartoon they don't seem real, so I have know interest in them.

Anyway I thought you'd like that little story,as we get to know each other.

Love to you
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LaffingRain
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #7 - Sep 24th, 2005 at 3:55pm
 
that would be fun to dream in cartoons...it happens to me on occassion that I have a cartoon, but a message attached to it. the guides love to pull my legs, tease me out there, they are a bunch of clowns for sure, but they themselves have not taken on cartoonish features, unless the monster cartoon I saw once time was a guide..possibility I just thought of! ha ha! thanks, alysia
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #8 - Sep 26th, 2005 at 6:54pm
 
Hi guys,

I’m enjoying this alphabet soup kind of rambly loose associative type of thread.  It’s helping me to get my thoughts together and hopefully gain back a lighter more joyful attitude.  I’m feeling rather bogged down and dense right now. 

Boundaries not a problem with interpersonal relationships the more I get to know myself but I’m experiencing a major problem with not being able to assert my boundaries in the world of work and systems.  Still feel dependent on the paycheck and not able to walk away feeling I’ll be able to financially survive/trust yet.  The trick with boundaries is that you have to feel deserving of better treatment while at the same time being aware of your weak or underdeveloped parts.  Boundaries in raising my boys and working with my brothers and sons always involved the rule of “No Hitting” while the cussing thing meant progress because at least they were verbal.  I’m the one with the mouth so they never had a chance.  Therefore, it was always up to me to stand up to what they had to say even if it was negative by listening.  Because in the end, they had to be reminded that in all their cussing, name calling, or insults, they really had neglected to state what it was they were really upset about and what they wanted to be done about it.  My sons always come clean regarding what’s behind all the blabber as does my current husband, the others, it’s hit and miss, and still other’s there’s no way of getting to the bottom of their intentions.   

Cartoons figures showed up some days when I was in the retail business but all were friendly lovable characters that were also just plain old gentle souls.  It was so funny and I used to go home and mention to my husband that today there were an awful lot of cartoon figures about. Never did understand that, but it made for a funny day.


Alysia, Anger I’ve noticed usually has a more basic emotions behind it like feeling hurt, frightened, discounted, or assuming other so called weaker/vulnerable individuals battles.  Nowadays, I seem to be recognizing the challenges these other so-called weaker/vulnerable souls have taken on and realize that mine are less basic or maybe not.  Either way, they have to fight their own battles and I can only help sometimes in small ways like making a call or just listening and enjoying being with them. But dieing with anger is a toughie.  If I had died awhile back, I could have seen myself in your sister’s position for I didn’t know then that it was a position, which I had a choice about.  Evidently, I was meant to grow past that strong energy catch all addictive emotion.  I mean that I realize the power of it to get you out of bed and to take action but I’ve also learned the downside of it where it limits love opportunities and hinders inner peace. 

Perspective rather than balance seems to help me to get a handle on things. Balance for me is more of a matter of looking at my life and daily routine to see if I’m addressing the various areas like tending to the physical, not working too much without time off, connecting with those I love, puttering, or just hanging out.  Perspective is the thing I tend to lose and the indication of this is when I get so bogged down.  It’s like I need a bird’s eye view, of the whole situation with all its possibilities before I’m at peace.  You know like the one you get in altered consciousness.  I know, maybe I’ll go check out what’s happening on that crazy board with all those movers and grooves and questioning peoples.

Thanks for letting me ramble, I just couldn’t let the weekend go by without saying hi, a lot of family stuff went on this weekend (change and love stuff) and how thankful I am that you all are here, even if you are just names on a chat-IMO you are real people and that’s why I love you guys.

Jean Kiss


 
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LaffingRain
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #9 - Sep 26th, 2005 at 8:39pm
 
Hi there Jean! love you! ...   ...  miss u when ur not here!
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #10 - Sep 27th, 2005 at 6:54pm
 
Alysia,

By your simple little responce to my ramblings you released my solar plexis before I went to work. Now that's what I call PUL. I return here a very tired warrior working on the front line and chuckle again at your graphics.

Much love and gratitude-Look forward to having a larger chunck of you through your written word-zee book coming out next year.  Jean Kiss
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Re: thinking of what death was like for sis
Reply #11 - Sep 27th, 2005 at 7:37pm
 
Jean....I finished it!!!!!! Cheesy  I feel so good to finish. sometimes wanted to put it in the trash, but decided if people want to do that, put it in the trash Cheesy  that will be up to them Embarrassed  I worked on it 6 to 10 hours daily for almost 2 years, and I didn't notice the time went by.
now I can start on the next book and the guides said this one will be easier! ha! just let me catch my breath first. mucho gracious for your kind comments that have helped me so much. love, alysia
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