I think it was neat how you offered to shake hands and forget all that stuff...it was his choice to turn away. don't feel bad if he has a problem. maybe you'll meet again after this fight and a truce will be called, that might be where it's headed. its for sure you two have a relationship......

Well, the fact is that I do hate this son-of-a-b**ch.
I'd like to think that I'll still be getting my PERSONAL
revenge on him 10,000 years from now...

A fight in a dream can also be that one is releasing negative emotions that are dragging one down.

Blessings, Mairlyn

It could possibly be a past life memory resurfacing. Just my 2 cents worth.

Love, Mairlyn

I know you want to keep the anger, Brendan, but the fact is that we progress whether we want to or not.  Yes, anger can be a creative power.  But there are other creative powers at work in our lives.

The fact that you even once went up to your enemy/friend and tried to shake his hand shows that you believe there can be a different outcome, somehow, at your core.  We can leave this lifetime without the outcome but the outcome WILL come.

love, blink

B-man,

I remember the reoccurring dreams that I had after my first husband and I got divorced.  It was always the same dream of fighting long exhausting fights in some sort of tenement.  This was after I was married to sweet man, my current husband, and living on a tropical island.  (As a note: One of the main reasons I fell crazy in Love with this guy was that he could express anger, assume responsibility for it, not let it get out of hand, and finally to use it as an opportunity for me to know where he stood on an issue or indicate a boundary so that our love for each other could grow. Without saying, these ground rules go for me too. Now when after an outburst we conclude together, “If you’d only do it my way, think like me, …we’d have no problem and laugh.)  Fortunately, I was also a merchandiser during that period and was able to work a lot of that anger energy out on the company baler (I slammed that sucker with all my might), climbing the OSHA ladder, and hefting tons of merchandise throughout those years.  But I also noticed that if I did any lifting when I was angry, I had to make an appointment with the chiropractor soon after.  You probably keep in pretty good shape and stay fit because of your anger too. 

Anyhow, after a while, I became better at letting the anger go as I was also reading and studying material pertaining to working with emotions and my spirituality.  As an aside, I’ve noticed that some of the most evolved individuals around me also tend to carry around a lot of anger that seem completely unaware of.  It always surprises me when I see this.  For example, I used to work with an older woman who was very knowledgeable on astrology, a psychic, and one of the individuals who was part of a group who would meditate in the new lamas. She was aware of her past lives and did a wonderful reading on me to reciprocate for something I’d done for her.  She was so angry in so many other areas and afraid of authority figures that it continually surprised me.  Another one that I work with now is a vegetarian, goes to local metaphysical meetings, and is a frustrated naturalist.  These are people who I do not expect to be as angry as they are.  Me, on the other hand, as the oldest of three brothers, and feeling responsible for them since I was 10 years old plus experiencing many other of life’s “injustices”, expect myself to have a lot of anger.  But as I’m learning that the anger energy, though while motivating and at times energizing, can also be draining. 

Furthermore, I’m learning that when I get really whipped up, within a short period, the grieving starts.  Now when I see it starting to escalate and if just recognizing it and telling myself to let it go doesn’t work, I seek a good laugh or a good cry and it dissipates (hugging a tree sometimes helps too).  Peace sometimes can be hard to come by but the dream you described could be the first step to healing, not necessarily the relationship, but the body.  Let’s face it, after you woke up, you didn’t have any bruises and you lived to tell the tale.  After my fight dreams ran their course, I became more interested in learning to forgive so that I could find peace and decrease my anger.  Currently, I notice that when they are asking/demanding impossible things of me at work, I feel my blood pressure rise and my face get hot.  That’s my reminder to speak up, speak out, and remember that I am not the victim in this situation but an intelligent caring conscientious individual who is doing the very best job I can for them.  Actually that attitude seems to be paying off more than holding in that energy, I think that I’m one of the few people left since March when I started there.  Weird.  Anyhow, another thought on anger, I forgot.  Oh yeah-now I remember.  That’s why I enjoyed reading Gordon’s book, Eternity and How to Enjoy It, where he continues to have this running battle with his best friend/enemy throughout many life times.  Anger is just another human emotion that we’re working with.  But I can see where, if we don’t get in touch with it and use it to our advantage, it can ooze out of us, like pus, at the most inopportune times.  I also suspect that some of our illnesses come from not being in touch with this useful emotion as well as many of our so-called “accidents” especially when we dissociate ourselves from it. 

The bottom line is that I know a lot about anger because I tend to get angry when I’m overwhelmed  , angry when I feel hurt  , angry when I frightened, angry when I’m frustrated  , …you get the idea.  But mainly I get angry when I feel powerless and forget that I’m not.  I’m really a very powerful individual, as each of you on this board are, especially when we remember that we are more than our body and have helpers in many guises, including those unseen/unremembered ones in our dreams.

Thanks for the topic-I’ve actually been contemplating on the anger issue this week for some reason and needed an outlet to explore it more fully in hard copy. And it’s sorta' like what I always tried to get across to my kids-Awareness is all-and when they were old enough to start getting intolerant of individuals who were prejudice and racist and they got so heated at those people that they shouted that they should be killed -I laughed  and told that their job was only to be aware of their own prejudices and recognize them to adjust their thinking in their own time.  I think that goes for this catch all emotion, anger, too.  For, IMO, the exercise, being human, is more about being real and congruent and aware, in whatever stage we’re at, then in being perfect.  Also, for me, hatred was a heck of a lot easier for me to let go of.  All I had to remember were those great words of my middle brother, “We are what we hate” and boy did find that to be true! Alysia's getting the first hand dope on this truth and sharing it with us.

Keep up the good work-for when we write it out here in a safe arena, we get the opportunity to see who we are.  It’s then that we all can more efficiently learn and grow.  It’s a buddy system after all.

Love, Jean