buddha1
Ex Member
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5 years ago my 2 yr old daughter passed away in my wifes arms in the hospital after developing complications from the rare form of dwarfism she was born with. I have never been particularly religious, I questioned my catholic upbringing in High school wondering why Christ the man was more important than his message and the very hypocritical past of the Roman catholic church. During my daughters hospital stay we were involved in a job at a catholic school, I work for a family owned contracting buisiness, and my twin brother was on site when another one of the contractors, a complete stranger, came up and asked him if he had a daughter. He said no and asked why. The guy said he didn't know but something compelled him to ask, that he thought this person was in need of prayer ( the contractor was a deeply religious man). Well my brother proceeded to tell him about my daughter and they prayed for her. He told me the story the next day and I was moved to tears, but I still had trouble with my faith in God. At the time I was angry with any God that would let an innocent child be in such pain. My beleifs were more in karma, but I didn't know what we could have done to deseve this. I have always beleived there is something more, on this earth and beyond, that we have power that are unaware of. Some times I think that I missed an opportunity to beleive and this is why she passed away, but deep inside I beleive whatever supreme power created us, part of that power is in us which makes us the same as God, the hard part is seeing that without doubt. When I was 22 myself and 4 friends went snowmobiling up at my lake house, one of my freinds got killed in an accident with another snowmobile ( hows this for coincidence my freind Keith Brian 22 and the other driver a stranger named Brian Keith both 22) That night I was told to wait for a phone call to go and identify his body, I had just fallen asleep when I felt him cone to me and say not to worry, everything was alright, not really in words but just a feeling. That was 17 years ago and that feeling is still pretty vivid. Needless to say I didn't get anything after my daughter passed away, I haven't really felt her at all. Is there any suggestions or thoughts out there. I still have some pretty good and real feeling dreams but not that often.
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