Greets, and a disclaimer that applies to everyone and every discussion - there isn't a 'right' or 'wrong', but (what we actually have in the Universe), are *perspectives*. Hence, it is perfectly 'right' or proper, if for eg. you (who read these words) do not agree totally, or at all, with any of the ideas we put forth in our posts. So to re-iterate, these discussions are really opportunities for various individuals and parties, to share their ideas and personal perspectives, and not to 'hammer it out until we all agree on the One Truth', which (this principle) is sometimes used as an underlying assumption for discussions. That is never our intention, so please, feel free (in fact it is encouraged) to have your own unique viewpoint, not just for these discussions, but for everything in life.
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Blink wrote :
Quote:It is idealistic to think we would all go through such a process for each moment of our lives, however it seems it would be very helpful to do so when particularly troubled in relationship to a situation or person(s).
Actually, no (to the postulation that it is idealism, and not necessarily applicable to all situations). The entire point of this Inquiry Process, which is essentially to *turn inward* for a clearer understanding of Self, is *universally* applicable to all situations.
Granted that it takes more effort and experience, for one to, in the midst of raging emotions, shift the focus to *within*, to understand where one's emotions and thoughts is truly pointing to, and to make the most lucid decision towards the most beneficial course of action.
But whose in hands does this (effort and experience) lie in? Yours.
In the beginning, it is more than expected (be patient with yourself), that the inquiry process and the clarification, comes *after* the heat of the emotions and event; and that is ok - afterall, there is still learning taking place, when studying your own emotions and thoughts within, even if the Inquiry process is done retrospectively. That is fine.
Increasingly however, one would gain more from the Inquiry process, when one has sufficient experience, exercises sufficient effort, and clarity of thoughts/emotions/consciousness, that one is able to, *right in the midst* of the raging emotions of the event, get that *aha* ("I've gone through this before, this time, I understand better and will make a more lucid decision").
It is as if, lifetime after lifetime, repeating patterns and circumstances are set up (this is not the fault of Karma, it is the fault of the lack of lucidity on the part of the individual), and only once sufficient lucidity is achieved (which is the entire point of Byron Katie's Inquiry process, the tool for the Clarification task of existence), then one is able to break free of the self-limiting karmic cycle, for the particular issue at hand.
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Regarding Dan's post, it can be soon realized, that for many of your points raised, you (Dan) are speaking on slightly different ideas/issues, and therefore, our ideas do not necessarily contradict each other's, nor are they necessarily mutually exclusive.
Quote: But I'm glad I'm not her. And I'll always be glad to have had her example so I know what I never, ever want to become.
Yes, this is one aspect of clarification; that from the incident, instead (or at least in addition to) of blindlessly flying off on an emotiontal rage, we understand that the traits as we *perceive* or interpret to be represented or *projected* by our boss, is that which we chose not to have, or manifest, within ourselves.
But it is also important not to judge (ie. directly associate a sense of ultimate worthiness or lovability, with the particular traits being studied) the soul, eg. your boss. This can be understood on two levels :
1) One can never be *absolutely* sure of the total (100%) accuracy of one's ideas about someone else. We are not in their shoes, so we cannot know 100% who someone else feels, or the entire picture of the true underlying intentions behind someone else's actions.
For instance, the person who commits a minor crime of shoplifing, to feed his starving child. Or the person who appears to betray his friends/country, for the sake of peace and greater good. The point is - do not be too quick to judge.
In chinese folklore, a popular theme, is that the dieties (or guides & helpers) would sometimes manifest physically as an ugly beggar (for eg.), to test the goodness of man in certain situations. In today's context, a useful equivalent idea would be "What if one of my guides & helpers, took fhe form of my boss or some other difficult person, or brought to me some difficult situation, to give me an opportunity for learning?"
It does not matter as to whether your boss is actually indeed your guide & helper in disguise, what matters is the (potential) benefit of insight you get from just *asking* the right questions, and whether you made the effort to learn anything from the (difficult? only if you make it so, by refusing lucidity) situation. In a way, everyone around us has some capacity as our guide & helper, but that is really up to us (to make use of this), isn't it?
2) Even if, theorectically, the person (eg. boss) is indeed as he has projected, eg. those nasty traits (eg. manipulative, selfish, bacstabbing) that you would never want to have for yourself. Well, should we judge the soul (who's struggling and already doing the best job of being himself as he knows how to), or should we be (more correctly)judging the *traits*?
Quote: The Wartime Atrocities Thing: If I'm in combat and someone's coming at me with a knife, I'm not going to stop and consider the karma of the situation. I WILL, however, consider the situation *perfect* afterwards as long as he's dead and I'm not.
This is again perfectly correct. You (Dan, or anyone) are just doing what you perceive to be the proper thing to do, given (what you understand) of the situation at hand, at that point in time - self preservation.
This is why we said that for any situation, even if seemingly atrocious, it is perfect (in its existence), because everyone involved, is already doing the best job of being themselves, as they can. Even the ones overshadowed by the darker forces, even the darker forces themselves. Eg. Certain political leaders whose selfishness and greed creates counter-cosmoethical consequences for many.
The situation is always perfect, precisely because that's the way it is. As Byron Katie says, when you argue against reality (of the situation), you lose, but only 100% of the time. So instead of deceiving yourself, accept the reality of the situation, and seek to *understand* what reality is offering to teach you, and from their, evolve *your own* (self-responsibility) emotions/thoughts/intentions, and execute a course of action of a higher cosmoethic level, as you deem possible and *choose* for yourself.
The pain from any given situation (eg. disease, violence, conflict), likewise, is perfect *in its function*, to remind the individual that there could certainly be a better way of doing things, a different direction which leads to other (equally perfect, of course) situations, that would be *truer* to one's lucid intentions and nature. That is to say, the pain from disease helps you to realize, "What I truly want, is to giver proper nourishment and care to the physical body, out of love for everything, including my body, myself, all my loved ones, and all the possibilities that I can achieve and be of service to others, if I am healthy and physically/emotionally/conscientially competent. I understand I might have neglected from doing so in the past, and will correct this for the future."
The situation was perfect (can you viciously blame the virus/bacteria from infecting your toxified tissues and body? They're just doing their job.) The pain was perfect (it was a function to remind you, hey mr soul, how about taking better care of your body?). What remains, is what you want to do about it next, and if you have sufficient lucidity to even recognize and seize this opportunity in the first place.
That is why we (such as Byron Katie, Hilarion, ourselves, etc) say, each time you encounter pain, suffering or difficulty, do yourself a huge favour and INQUIRE. CLARIFY. EVOLVE.
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Quote:The Someone Beating Up Someone Else Thing: Been there, done that when I saw a friend being assaulted. The most cosmoethical thing I could come up with was to beat the living crap out of the perpetrator. I considered the energies/meaning/consequences/karma/intentions *perfect* afterwards upon seeing him layed out on the ground. The only love and clarity I felt was toward my friend. She wasn't badly hurt, fortunately. Maybe I'm not evolved enough, but I didn't much care about the karma of the whole thing when it was over. I did what needed to be done. I hope now that the person involved learned something about consequences.
The situation was certainly perfect, because that's the way it happened. Quite obviously, you did what you understood (at that point in time) to be the most helpful thing to do, that is to incapacitate the aggressor to protect your friend.
And yes, it is clear (to yourself and to those who read your story) that it was the love for your friend, that was the primary motivation for your actions.
Would Byron Katie do the same? Would Jesus Christ (Sananda) do the same? Would Hilarion do the same? Would any Serenissimus do the same? (WWJD - What Would Jesus Do? is an idea used by some Christians, you could use a version you're comfortable with - the point of it is Inquiry - to look within for the answers).
Maybe, maybe not. As far as the Inquiry process is concerned, it does not matter. The external action might well be exactly the same, or similar, as your course of action, or it might be different. For sure, each being would take the most beneficial, cosmoethical decision that he/she is able to understand and (able to) carry out at that moment.
What is far more important, as far as the Inquiry process is concerned, is not so much the external action, but the looking *within* for answers. Not for the answers to why that aggressor did what he did, but the answers to why *you* did what *you* did, what was the true nature and percentage breakdown of the emotions, thoughts, motivations underlying your actions, and to what extent, was it in *true* alignment with what you *truly* want, etc.
No one can ever truly judge another (in fact, why would anyone in his most lucid mind, even want to? that's not being self-responsible), and this of course, includes (for this discussion) you (Dan), and your actions on that day.
Thusly, the situation is perfect, there's no *need* to dwell on it further, *unless* you wish to do so. Meaning, if you ask yourself in total honesty, what were your emotions then, and do they have anything to teach you (eg. if there was fear, could the fear be clarified away with, such that you could still carry out the same external action, out of 100% love and no fear whatsoever? And remember that anger, always comes from fear*)whether in retrospect, there might have been other, more desirable ways of dealing with the situation, etc.
*Nobody* can judge you, or *even* the situation, to say, "Yes, you could have done such and such without resorting to violence", that may not be true, for instance, *they* might have done such and such without resorting to violence, it does not mean *you* (at that point in time) could have, or would choose such. That is why only *you*, can give the answers to these questions.
So you (all dear readers) see, the beauty of Byron Katie's Inquiry process is that it is not a judgemental one. When you ask these (sometimes difficult) questions, there is *no* right or wrong answers. (No guide & helper will come along and say, "wrong! you lie!" However, they may, as is the case in the Life Review after one's incarnation in the intermissive period, observe other possibilites (eg. that you may not be truthful or loving with yourself, etc) and share those with you, allowing you to the opportunity to consider their insights and perspective, but they'll never force you to accept their ideas).
Hence, in Byron Katie's Inquiry process, it is Clarification because the answers come from *within*,
*WE* TEACH *OURSELVES*, about the meaning of our own emotions, thoughts and intentions. And once we are clearer about ourselves, (tremendous) acceleration of karmic evolution is possible.
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(*about the anger comes from fear bit)
"So you're saying, that I could have felt no anger in the least, when my dear friend was threatened with real danger and injustice?"
Yes, ask yourself, WWJD - What Would (eg.) Jesus Do? It is quite easily forseeable, that Jesus (or any Serenissimus) would have the wisdom to do what would be required for the safety of his friend (*possibly* exactly the same as your chosen course of action, or perhaps not, it doesn't really matter here), but (what matters, is that) he would be able do carry it out in complete love, without an iota of fear or anger.
This is another great lesson, that Byron Katie often points out, for all of us. Doing the Inquiry process, not feeling any anger for the victims of 911, the Tsunami, war atrocities, etc, definitely does *not* equate to inaction or apathy. It is in fact, *totally* the contrary. Those who correctly carry out the Inquiry process, no longer feel anger and suffering, instead they feel great love and clarity, and are not only even more highly motivated to reach out and take action to assist, but are able to do so in far more lucid and effective ways.
Clarity is also a prerequisite to working actively with the guides & helpers, who are our extraphysical aspects of the equation; and that both we (intraphysicals) and they (extraphysical guides & helpers) must work *together*, for the Earth experiment to succeed.
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As to the "Maybe I'm not evolved enough", this sentence isn't true, of course, in fact it's (the sentence itself) quite nonsensical. You (each individual) are exactly as evolved as you are, not an iota less, and that is totally perfect. It's also perfect if you *choose* to continue your evolution, to accelerate it, or even to stagnate it, or to devolve. Either way, it's perfect, because it's your choice.
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(continued in part II)