Lights of Love
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Has anyone here ever wondered where immaturity comes from? It comes from harboring the fear of rejection deep inside of you, which causes you great pain.
(Please note: For clarification purposes… Divine Essence (DE) = Love, God, Great Spirit, Universal Force, etc. or whatever that means to you personally.)
Each of us was born with what I call innocence. Innocence means having a direct connection to the great spiritual wisdom and spiritual power through the Divine Essence (DE) that is within each and every one of us. This essence is love (PUL). This connection to DE gives us the feeling of complete safety. As we mature, this connection and feeling of safety slowly fades and is replaced by parental voices that are intended to protect us and keep us safe. These voices tell us about what is right, what is wrong, what is good, what is bad, how to react in various situations, how to make decisions, etc. But instead of making us feel safe, they bring confusion into our psyche because they conflict with what we, as a child already innately knows through the spiritual wisdom of love.
A child’s spiritual innocence is love and love trusts all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. As our childlike connection to our DE fades we begin to experience fear of rejection, fear of being wrong, fear of being bad, etc. and this results in the child feeling great terror pain. Our child psyche begins to try to replace the original innate spiritual wisdom with a functioning ego, however, the ego produced is overlaid with the internalized parental voices and this produces the “mask self” or the front that a person presents to the world.
The reason why this mask is produced is because the child is making an attempt to get back the original spiritual innocence he or she was born with. The child is trying to express him or her self in a positive manner that is acceptable to a world that he or she is afraid will return rejection.
The intention of the mask self is to try to protect us from a world that we have learned to believe is cruel and hostile by proving to the world that we are right or good. The mask self is full of pretense, which leads us to feel like a fake because deep inside we know that in order to maintain our “goodness” we have to put on a “good show” or masquerade. The mask self also has the intention of denial in that it denies having the purpose of masking fear and pain. By having denial the mask intends to protect the self by blaming others and not taking responsibility for any negative thoughts, words or deeds. Eventually we get tired of having to live by someone else’s rules and we lash out.
Somewhere inside of us we enjoy lashing out. Why? The movement of energy within us always feels gratifying and titillating regardless of whether or not it is of the negative or positive variety. Negative energy comes from what is called the “Lower Self” and unlike the mask self, this part of us does not deny the negative part of our self. It also does not pretend to be nice; therefore the lower self is more truthful about its negative intent. The lower self actually enjoys the experience of running negative energy, but this is also a cover-up for the fear and pain deep inside. The lower self has no intention whatsoever of allowing itself to feel this pain so it will do anything and everything to maintain separation from it.
As the child matures all of his or her psyche is not separated from Divine Essence. A portion of our psyche remains clear and lucid and filled with sweetness and love without having any struggle or friction associated with it. This is the part of us that is called our “Higher Self” and is always in direct connection with our Divine Essence. The higher self is full of spiritual wisdom, love and great spiritual power. The higher self facilitates all of the goodness, joy, loving fulfillment, peace and harmony that have been created in our lives. Our higher self is the part of us that is not separated from our divinity and the intention of the higher self is to seek an understanding of truth, communion of souls, individuality and self-awareness as well as intimacy and affinity with God or the Creator Essence.
What is so confusing in human relationships and interactions is that they differ according to the intent underlying a particular thought, word or deed and this is dependent upon where someone is in their level of maturity. I think the deepest pain of all is cause by self-betrayal. By acting from the mask self or lower self we are first of all betraying our higher self or our “true self” and also, by acting from the mask self or lower self we are showing others and our self exactly where it is that we need to mature. By mature I mean understand where the pain inside of you is coming from, release it and replace with the qualities of love. In this way then we are once again reunited with our Divine Essence.
Much love to all, Kathy
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