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My First Experiences!! - using what Bruce said in (Read 203647 times)

gary

Ex Member

1st retrieval?
Reply #195 - Dec 27^th, 2002 at 6:11pm

Bruce mentioned I might put this experience in the group after contacting him and asking for advice a while ago. I know this is not a vets in practice forum but bare with me.

We lost our dog, a German shepherd. It was just small lump on his side at first and we weren’t too concerned. He had a tendency to “flop” down where he wanted to lay and after decorating we had a steam wallpaper stripper hanging around in the kitchen where he slept at night. It was a square box with a hose and attachment and we thought, after seeing him lain and lent up against the stripper, that he had “Flopped” down and banged himself against the stripper. It was a bruise.

A week passed and the lump didn’t seem to disappear so we took him along to the vets and after an examination the vet told us that it looked like a blood blister, albeit a large one and it could be dealt with. We took him back a few days later for the surgery and the vet mentioned that he had a couple of back teeth that could do with removal and that while he was out we might as well get them done. We collected him later that day, half conscious, shaved side with bare flesh on the operated area and a large stitched incision. He drooled but that was expected. The vet gave us pain killers and later that evening as the surgery injected pain killers wore off we needed them. It only seemed a matter of time and he would be through it. It was four days later when the vet rang us back and told us that as a matter of course she had sent a sample of the removed tissue off to be analysed and the result was that it was a cancer and the rest of it (apparently she hadn’t taken everything away) had to be removed because it was of a type that spread, especially to the lungs (cannon ball apparently). We took him back the next morning and left him there. It was another surgery (in the same place) in a short space of time and it wouldn’t be easy on him, but it was for the best, we told ourselves, and sat at home waiting for the phone call so we could go and pick him up. The phone call came but it contained more than just the time we could go and collect him. Apparently after opening him up and trying to get the rest of this lump they discovered it went deeper than they thought so they x-rayed and saw it ran deeper, deeper than they could remove, plus there were the signs on his lungs of the “cannon ball” cancer. We were told to take him home and enjoy what time we had with him. Within two weeks we had to take him to an emergency vet and there was only one solution. He was in a bad way and it wasn’t going to get any better, he was in pain. I was surprised at the speed once that injection was given. We drove to the foreshore and we cried, maybe from a sense of guilt, having let him be dispatched, but the feelings of loss were overwhelming. My partner and I have had dogs all of our lives, both together and separately while growing up. We have both lost many dogs but none of the loses affected us like this one did. This was grieving and it lasted months.

Now and again my partner would mention that she “felt him” and now and again I though I saw something out of the corner of my eye. So maybe something was there, maybe. After we had put him through so much maybe it was comforting to ourselves that he may still be around.

I came across bruces work and saw the section on contacting departed ones and on retrievals. What struck me was the idea of imagining.
Here’s my reasoning at this point: Max, our dog, still around us, yes it might seem right in a romantic sense but was it our own guilt that was keeping him here, our own desires that kept calling him to us and not allowing him to move on and go where he would be better off. It seemed selfish and cruel, especially if he may be confused at what was happening, wondering why nobody paid any attention to him. So here’s what I did one night while sat at the computer:

I was reading on Bruces site, especially about the imagination part of contact, and felt a brush of my leg like Max used to do when I sat at my desk.
I decided that what was needed and for the best was a retrieval. After a few moments I turned to look in to the front room and “decided” that my deceased mother should come in to the room, call him over, and leave with him. Well my “imagination” brought my mother in to the room, but surprisingly I got a sense of my partner’s deceased father, why i should introduce him as well I don’t know. It seemed to go alright and strangely I felt I had done the right thing.

My partner and I have always had an interest in things afterlife-ish, so to speak, and she is invited along to a spiritualist meeting and she duly attends. After a couple of meetings and not getting much contact she attends and feels something brush by her legs as she sits listening to the medium reading someone. The medium notices something and halts his reading and tells the audience that a large dog has moved across the row my partner is sat on and can any body relate to that? My partner puts her hand up and the medium relates what he sees. He has a large dog, that came from around where she sat, and is with a small woman that has passed (My mother was around 5ft), the name BO is connected here, as is the name MICHAEL. My partner cannot connect the names. The reading ends and the medium moves on.

This was a case of psychic amnesia on my partners behalf. My name is Gary but my family name, used only by members of my immediate family was Bo, and my brother’s name is Michael. (Nobody has called me Bo in at least 8 years.)

Maybe it was a confirmation that my retrieval was a real event. Anyway all I know is it happened like it did and for me it was just something that tipped the scales a little way more in one direction for me.

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Linh

Ex Member

My FIRST Retrieval!!!!
Reply #196 - Dec 26^th, 2002 at 1:20pm

Hello my friends,

After mentally reviewing what transpire with my first retrieval, I have realize that I actually conducted my first RETRIEVAL!!!! For 4 days,I been feeling like it was all made up by my vivid imagination. However, Alysia's post gave me hope when she said that some times retrievals seem like it is all made up which was exactly what I felt about my first!

Here goes..

I was listening to Bruce's Friday Harbor tapes (#7), and he was doing the retrieval exercise with his group. I remember flying over a lake. There was a big house or mansion situated close to the lake. Next thing I know, my helper and I were standing near the doorway of a study room looking at a man in his fortys staring at his bookshelf. I couldn't see his face, but I had the impression that he was wearing a robe. With Bruce's cue (still listening to the tape), I began talking to the man and asking him questions. I found out his name was Bill Morton; he was a lawyer in Minnesota. I pretended to be interested in his book collections. Telling him how much I love reading and if I could borrow his books. I then ask him if my friend could look at his books,too. That was when I felt my helper walk towards him. For the first time, I saw my helper. My helper was a female with blonde hair and blue eyes. She was wearing a long, flowy dress. She shook Bill's hand and said her name was Dorothy. She pretended to be interested in his books,too. While he was showing her his books, I said to him,"hey, I know where we can go with many books..the library! Do you want to go?" He said "yes". Dorothy took his hands and walked off into the blackness. I was following from behind. The study room faded - it was replaced by blackness for a split second. Next thing I saw was green grass, sidewalk, people walking to their destination, and a big, magnificent, white building. We walked up the stairs to the library's extrance. Inside, the place seem spotless and very white. Bill and I were in awe with the place. While we were admiring the library, a lady walked towards us. Bill recognize the person. He ran and hugged her. He looked really happy. They walked off together. I stayed behind with Dorothy. I thanked her and came back to C1.

In hindsight, I am slowly getting excited about my retrieval because I am realizing that I truly did not make this up. This is an actual retrieval!Yippieee!!!

Thank you for believing in me, Marta,Ginny, Marilyn,Alysia, C3too, romain, healing, Bruce, and others (sorry, I forgot your names).

Love,
Linh

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jeff

Ex Member

Re-Visit to Christopher's House
Reply #197 - Dec 23^rd, 2002 at 2:57pm

Hello everyone.

First of all let me wish you all a Happy Holiday season!! I hope everyone is well. Even though I've not been posting or replying frequently, I go on this site everyday and read.

Do you folks remember Christopher, the NYC fireman who died in the WTC who I retrieved a couple of months ago? Well, just to jog your memories, he was stuck in his home (where he lived with his parents). His guides were ringing the doorbell trying to get his attention. Apparently, this was affecting the doorbell in C1 as well as the level on which Christopher was stuck. Every time somebody Here answered it, there was nobody there.

I later found out from my co-worker Angelica (who is dating Christopher's younger brother) that the doorbell did indeed stop ringing after the retrieval.

A couple of weeks ago Angelica told me that the doorbell had started ringing on its own again and asked me to check. She and I were both worried that somehow a portal had been opened and now other spirits were in the house. On Saturday I decided to go ahead and check on this situation.

I tried using Bruce's 3-D blackness technique. But it was mid-morning and my bedroom was very sunny. The blinds weren't enough to block out the light. Then my guide Jane Preston came through. She told me that she'd accompany me to Christopher's house. She instructed me to float in the 3-D blackness which I did for several minutes. Every time I asked if we were ready to go she'd say just stay and float. Finally, I sensed a difference in the texture of what I was seeing (which was more like a uniform purple because of the light) although I couldn't actually see it. The moment I sensed it, Jane said, "There!!" I felt an acceleration. Actually, this acceleration happened a couple of times. I'd stop after a few seconds and then it would start again. Finally, I stopped and sensed I was in a different place although I still couldn't really see. But I knew we were in Christopher's parent's place.

Jane appeared but looked slightly different than normal. I commented on it. She said I was accessing different levels of her energy and that's why her appearance seemed slightly altered.

I hesitantly asked what was causing the doorbell to ring at Christopher's parent's house. Jane merely replied that I should trying sensing what was going on around me. After several moments of receiving nothing, I got the image of hundreds of black bat wings flapping in a confined space. Alarmed, I asked Jane what was going on. Was there dark energy here? Something evil? She smiled and said no. So I let the image go. Then I got a sense of angels and white light. But it seemed dense and not quite right, so I let that go too. Then I heard a woman's wailing. I asked Jane what this meant. She said to keep tuning in. I still wasn't getting anything. I wasn't really frustrated but the impressions didn't seem to be coming. I wondered if maybe I was in over my head.

Then it all hit me at once. Emotional energy. Christopher's mom and also the rest of the family were still grieving heavily. Then I about the doorbell. It had stopped after Christopher's retrieval. But now it was happening again. But there didn't seem to be any beings around who were ringing the door.

Although the ringing doorbell had alarmed them, the family knew on some level that it was related to Christopher, even believing that his "ghost" was trying to contact them. In their minds, this was at least some kind of contact with their son. After it stopped ringing earlier this Fall, they believed they'd lost contact. Somehow their intense desire to have contact with Christopher was causing THEM to ring the doorbell. Their intense grief was causing a poltergeist effect. I sensed that most of the effect came from the mother although it was a combination of the energies of both parents.

Somehow Christopher's mother had unconsciously figured out how to do it, probably intense will combined with the intense emotional energy of grief. I don't understand how this works but Jane confirmed it for me.

I asked what we could do about it. She replied that the physical doorbell might have to be replaced since the current one was now "tempered" to the family's unconscious emotions (and thought patterns). She said I could work with them (meaning the parents) energetically.

I filled myself with light. Then I connected to Christopher's mom. She appeared to have very dark hair that seemed either pulled back. I got an imp. that she was short and stocky although I perceived that she was taller than her husband. This surprised me as Christopher was tall and blond.

Suddenly Christopher appeared with a man whom I took to be his guide. Apparently this was to be a learning session for him. He was observing me working with his parents in order to learn how to make better contact. I got the impression that he'd been unsuccessful in previous efforts to contact them. This surprised me. I thought, "He's in spirit form now. Surely he can learn more from his guides than from me." But I kept going.

TO BE CONTINUED

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jeff

Ex Member

Re: Re-Visit to Christopher's House-PART TWO
Reply #198 - Dec 23^rd, 2002 at 2:58pm

After I finished with his mother, I connected to his dad who seemed to be balding. He had dark blond hair (what was left). Also, something seemed to be wrong with one of his feet, like the heel or something. I don't know which foot it was. I got the impression of either a brace or some kind of special shoes. Christopher nodded as these images crossed my mind, confirming my impressions. I also got that the father was shorter than his wife.

I kept wondering where Christopher got his height and his blond hair. His father's seemed almost brown to me and the mother's was very dark. Then I got an imp. that he got his hair color from one of his aunt's who were light blond.

I formed a triangle with the mother and father, linking us through each of our heart centers. Surprisingly, Christopher tried to merge his energy with me. At first it was too much and he disconnected. Then he observed me for a moment and tried again. This time it worked. It's always interesting when this happens. I felt like he was a part of my mind, a part of me. Like we were one person with elements of each of our personalities blended. It seemed perfectly natural.

Through me Christopher approached his mother and began talking to her, telling her that he was alright and happy where he was. Then he approached the father and did the same (this was where I got the imp. about the foot).

Then we finished and I let the energy triangle fade. Christopher went back to his guide. Jane said we were finished and that I could go back to C1. She said I had "lots of things to take care of" in C1. She smiled as she did so. (Boy she wasn't kidding!! Right after that I finally got some answers about a problem I've been having with my next door neighbor.)

As we floated over Christopher's house, I saw lights streaming toward it. Jane said they (I took her to mean helpers) were trying to energetically reduce the denser emotional energies surrounding the house which had, in part, caused the poltergeist. She said now Christopher would be making contact on his own. I suspect the family will be getting lots of dream visits from him.

I receded and returned to C1.

******************************************************************************

I spoke to Angelica today. She wasn't surprised about what I told her. The grief in the house is intense. Apparently every week the parents are going to some kind of meeting or memorial. Both of the parents are currently in therapy. Angelica told me that the father tried to go off his medication, had a nervous breakdown and almost tried to commit suicide. These folks are having a real hard time.

By the way, Angelica has never told them (including her boyfriend) about my previous retrieval or any of our conversations. They're very strict Catholic and she fears the reaction they might have.

Angelica was also able to verify some other details

1. Christopher's mom's appearance. She had short, jet black hair before her son's death (she's Italian, her husband's Irish). After his death she dyed her hair blond. Angelica thought it was interesting that I was seeing the dark hair, as if I were seeing her the way Christopher remembered her. She wears her hair short, NOT in a bun or pulled back. She is tall, not short. In fact, that's where Christopher gets his height. She IS stocky or heavy set.

2. Christopher's dad. Angelica told me that he walks funny. She said she always assumed it was because of a problem with his knees. She doesn't know the exact cause but has volunteered to find out. He IS short, shorter than his wife. And apparently all of his hair fell out which explains the balding. And yes, he's got dark blond or mousy brown hair.

3. Christopher has aunts who are light blond like him.

That's it. It'll be interesting to see how things turn out. I was thinking about volunteering to go back to work with his parents again. But I got the sense that I should only do it if requested, that they need to work things out amongst themselves. I wish them all good luck!

Love and light,

Jeff

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alysia

Ex Member

2 different types of retrievals
Reply #199 - Dec 23^rd, 2002 at 1:30pm

have been thinking lately about how real some retrievals feel, and others you just feel like a fool making them up. once you have one that involves a sense of physical touch, hearing and sight you get spoiled and don't want to use the imagination anymore. so I think I blocked myself from using the imagination in that regard for months, since feb. however yesterday I employed the imagination technique/intent again and had a retrieval experience in which the interpretor was over-reactive to every thing that was happening, saying things like "OH no! don't do that! oh dear! can we change this? lol! the interesting part of this retrieval was there were two to retrieve, and no guides to be perceived anywhere. just me struggling along, over-reacting. good exercise in control though. there was a boy around 14 yrs age, dressed in too large of a soldiers uniform, he wanted to be a soldier in the worst way, but he wasn't a soldier, it was just dress-up time for him. he stood beside a small stream, just playing around, two "real soldiers" in different uniforms saw him and shot at him, he was mistaken for the enemy, he crawled into a tube that went underground but the soldiers found him, (meanwhile I'm anguishing over the whole thing unduly) I find myself pulling him out of the pipe thing at the same time the soldiers are doing this, they kind of laugh heartlessly and say something to the effect "he's only a boy." so next I bring him to his home where his mother has him in the coffin in the house, as was the custom, but she denies his death, she sits a place at the dinner table for him every day. I see what I must do. I must help her to say a temporary goodbye to the beloved son. so I tell him to materialize to her, so that she may touch him and know of his continued reality. he is a little annoyed at his mother's hysteria, but he tells her he must go now. I sense this is like an astral imprint screen, that I am clearing these energies from the screen, that the actual event has long since passed. I keep asking myself is the boy me? I don't know it doesn't seem to matter really, whether it was myself. its just I don't usually get that involved emotionally.

then before going to bed I was thinking about blocking retrievals because I only want the "real" ones. I kept asking myself in which way I was limiting my explorations, I was propelling little questions into the ether like tiny airplanes....this voice said "sweetheart!" oh, right..great...ok I said so I'm a sweetheart..is that the best you can do?" lol? I am a self-discounting person. point well taken. then I must have cleared out at least some of the blocks about having retrievals in any fashion they want to happen because the next thing I knew I was propelling myself in this zooming type way into an area where a guy was showering...whoops!! it all seemed natural to me and the first feeling/thought, or some voice was telling me, "sit up and pay attention, this one is not to be doubted. it is real. so thats great. I accept that and I am be face to face with him yet I'm not conscious of being anything other than a ball of light, he sees something different, he makes a flippant remark which I ignore, his mindset is that a shower gets him ready for a new day, something like that, and that's why I'm able to retrieve him, he has been there a long time and I'm told no other info. about him as its so swift, I am only able to see a look of surprise on his face as he is taken so quickly.

next time maybe I'll ask for more details, or maybe I had the details, just didn't bring it all back to remembrance. that do happen. one retrieval I seemed to struggle with what to do, the other so swift, no wonder I don't remember much. swift is good though. namaste, alysia

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Ginny

Ex Member

Gender:

A fireside chat
Reply #200 - Dec 21^st, 2002 at 7:33pm

Last evening I wanted to return to my Focus 27 tree house and talk with Disk members...and this is what happened.

Once in the 3D blackness I floated for a few minutes and in then observing its texture noticed ahead and to the right a light blue area that was somewhat round. It then felt to be a portal and in focusing my attention on it I was then suddenly just 'seeing' and feeling a whitish area all around me (I'm still trying to get use to this instantaneous way of traveling!) and I knew I was on the deck of my tree house. As I was making the adjustment to suddenly being there I took note of the different feeling my F27 place had opposed to being in the 3D blackness. I opened up to sense my windchimes and got that they weren't making their usual 'wind music'..and thought this was interesting. I then was seeing my deck as if through foggy vision and knew there wasn't anyone there so turned and moved inside the house into the huge livingroom area.

The area was in semi-darkness, a soft orange glow casting about from a crackling fire in the fireplace. I saw two individuals sitting on the couch facing the fireplace and moved closer, sending them a happy greeting feeling. I sat in the stuffed chair to their right, wondering about the fact that in their presence I had more clarity of 'seeing' and sensing. The fogginess and silence out on the deck had felt like an indication they just weren't there.

The person the farthest from me was tall and I sensed he was my Indian friend who had guided me into my last 'alnernate life as a wolf and woman' episode. The person to his right, on my immediate left, was a woman, feeling to be around 30ish with long straight hair catching the fire light. I couldn't sense anything about her and left it at that. Their faces were in semi-darkness but I could feel their calmness, a quiet contentment to be sitting with me.

I asked them a personal question and a mental/knowing back-and-forth conversation took up a few minutes...and I marveled at how stable or real the room, their presence and our interaction felt. No wonder they had wanted a new F27 place for months: for me to finally become really acquainted with them. It was apparent I had somewhere along the line dropped the idea that my disk or any members were more advanced or holier-than-thou. All of us were equal partners of a huge conglomerate.

Feeling comfortable with them and a sense they were willing to answer an questions I had, I thought of Bob Monroe and asked, "Is it true it's considered quite a boon for a disk when a member, while still living in physical reality, or any reality, becomes aware of their disk connection and journey's 'back to it', sort of rediscovers it as if coming out of a state of amnesia (meaning becoming aware and contacting our disk as so many are doing now in this day and age). The Indian said in a small rote which I'll try to translate into words here, "Yes. All that each member experiences is instantaneously shared with the whole." (As I was absorbing this rote I simultaneously saw a mental image of something spreading out from the center of an open umbrella kind of object, moving rapidly along its spokes to the outer edge where members were in the process of experiencing various realities.) "The awareness involved in such a 'rediscovery of one's disk' has a different quality to it...an influence on all members that has a tendency to bring on change." (I could feel within this rote that disk members deep within other realities, or those out on the edge such as with me and anyone else experiencing an independent life, would experience this 'rediscovery awareness' in various ways...but it always brought about some kind of change that perhaps instigated questioning, wondering, or even the beginning of their own 'disk rediscovery'). As I thought about this it didn't feel that this kind of awareness was special or abundant....just insightful that permeated and influenced others in a positive fashion.

I then looked at them and said I didn't know their names. The Indian remained quiet and I sensed he was thinking I was funny. I looked to the woman and got something that started with the letter 'm'. A few names flashed around in my mind and I just let it go. I was getting a sense that it wasn't necessary to have names. So I asked if I could just get a feel for their energy so I'd be able to I.D. them in the future. The woman then did something that confused me...and it happened so fast it's difficult to describe here. It sort of appeared and felt as if she was rapidly changing shape, from one body and I guess from one personality to another, so quickly that it had the feeling quality of when we see many quick emotions pass over someone's face in the physical. I wondered if she was trying to decide something?..or show me something?....keep something hidden for my benefit? She had remained the same woman, in appearance and feel, as this metamorphism swiftly took place...and it was difficult to 'see' this in the subdued firelight anyway, so I could be off base in what was going on with her....but she then leaned toward me and touched my left knee with her right hand. I instantly felt the feeling of my mother from my current life (she died in 1979) come to me and just as quickly let it go because I thought I was misunderstanding this feeling. It came back and I then had a strong knowing that this woman, who appeared nothing like my mother had looked in the physical, had played that role as my mother: that she was or had not only been in that role but many others. Was I seeing now, in this F27 livingroom, a disk member who was offering to me her idea of a body image she preferred, while say, meeting with me? A welling of emotion (sadness over missing her, that kind of longing to be connected with one's Mom) suddenly gripped me and the room momentarily flashed a bright white as I saw this surge of white-light-emotion arc up and around the other two. And just that quickly all was back to the same fire light and semi-darkness as they remained motionless, watching me. I was able to get a grip on myself and not be overwhelmed...and I realized that that pain, sadness and longing for her company was much less intense now, compared to when she and I had had a reunion or sorts almost two years ago in F27. I knew this was a good sign that I was letting go of that 'mother role' she had played out with me...and that I could begin to appreciate her more for the being she truly was. This felt good and I expressed to them that I understood and was happy I was making some kind of progres in that area. I then asked her--feeling I still wanted to at least experience her for a moment as 'Mama'--"So...how are you?" I instantly felt silly but she seemed to understand with a smile. I asked her how that life had been for her (the one we had shared as mother and daughter...although she had manifested what is known today as schizophrenia, she had been a spiritual person and a seeker of wanting to know who and what she really was, as eternal beings). She paused and said it had been interesting...learned a great deal. A lot of the fear and anxiety she had experienced had resulted from beliefs she held then, about hearing voices and seeing things we aren't suppose to see..and that some of those manifestations where from actual disk members. She then said she had been to some capacity an escort or usher to me in that life...to help me get on the right path, so to speak, regarding rediscovering self, our disk. I told she had done a great job. I laughed, remarking she now had long straight hair---because as 'Mom' she had always disliked her curly hair. She thought that was funny. The word Mayan came back at me...and then I got, "No, Mya (pronounced my-uh)...you can call me Mya if you like: a name I enjoy."

I then asked them, "So just exactly where are disks located in the afterlife? I've always had this image of them hovering out, around and beyond the ELS and focus levels, out in a vastness such as what outer space implies." The Indian answered quietly, saying that instead of seeing disks inside or within that 'space, beyond focus levels'....see it the other way around: see all that 'space, focus levels, the universe' *within* the disks. This got my attention because I had a brief mental image/feeling of what he was saying (after returning to C1 a thought went through me, to I guess help me get an even better feeling/understanding of this: *ask anyone where their dreams live, reside*). "So there really is no 'location' for disks...", was my reply and he nodded, saying, "In essence, yes....no location....a disk *just is*."

"Do we currently have other disk members who are waking up, so to speak, rediscovering our disk and making contact as you guys have helped me to do?" The Indian said, "Yes, many." I was surprised and asked, "Really? Who are they?!" He stared at me, remaining silent. I just started laughing at this and said, "Ahh c'mon....who are they? This is fascinating! I'd just like to know who they are, what they're all about, what kind of life they're currently focused in." He then moved forward about an inch from the waist, still sitting on the couch, and placed his chin in the palm of his left hand, staring at me intently. I could see the fire reflecting in eyes that I then knew were filled with laughter. He was having to make quite an effort to not burst out laughing right then and there. This felt strange, as if he was waiting for me to 'get it'...and I wasn't. I laughed, kind of bouncing a little in the stuffed chair out of frustration, saying that yes, I wasn't 'getting it'....what was it that I wasn't getting? (thought I'd try a different angle to get an answer---lol). He continued staring at me, his hand covering his mouth, eyes glittering with orange fire and a wealth of humor and information he wasn't going to let go of. Okay. I decided I was gonna have to figure this out on my own...and it was we

"Intelligence is knowing that which is important." Albert Einstein

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C3too

Ex Member

A beginner's field trip!
Reply #201 - Dec 18^th, 2002 at 5:27am

I've hesitated posting this experience from early last week. It is not really a retrieval, but my beginning efforts in exploring. I'd been working with being in Focus 10 (which I find very different from meditating), and afterward I felt sleepy but couldn't fall asleep so decided to try some thing else. I made a lengthy self-statement about connecting with my higher self and to participate in a "healing" (didn't specify "retrieval", which I don't feel ready for) with the help of guides, and felt and expressed gratitude for the opportunity. I "saw", eyes closed, a mish-mash of moving, changing geometric shapes, no clarity. I watched then tried to move through it but didn't seem to. I asked for clarity/understanding. I then could make out faint color, rays of violet and green, soft, diffuse, and the other shapes shifting. I attempted to open more, and sensed space & light & peace. But I also felt a bit distracted, like I had to watch for signs and do something. Kept seeing shapes but nothing clear. Asked for clarity but nothing changed. I waited a bit, then asked if anyone was there. No answer. Waited, then asked again, no answer. Asked if I was alone and got "No." Asked "Are you here to guide me?" Got "yes." What should I do? "Wait." I waited and watched vague shapes shifting. Everything too fleeting to follow or identify. So I sent the thought "All that is here, I send you love," and felt myself sending what love & light I could, which didn't feel like much. And the shapes all became hands! Simple hands, all colors, all reaching toward me, reaching hard, seeming desperate. I sent love again, and saw the hands reaching still. A third time I sent love, and this time there was a change: the hands were still there, but starting to find and touch each other. Instead of desperation, I sensed "discovery", like surprise to find that they were not alone. I watched and sent love again. Sensed much calmer hands, hands holding, connecting with each other, finding comfort together. More peaceful.

That was it, I opened my physical eyes. I didn't sense that they were "retrieved" or who they were, but I felt I was observing their exploring their own existence, and felt a shift in their collective energy. And I also felt comforted. I realize, maybe they were parts of me, but I didn't sense that, one way or another.

Thanks for listening. I hope this is not too basic an experience to post here, but I know there are other newbies, like me. And thanks to all of you for sharing your explorations with me.

C3too

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Marta

Ex Member

Second visit to the Creation Center!
Reply #202 - Dec 17^th, 2002 at 3:28pm

Hi everyone!

After my last experience in the Creation Center, I had so many questions that I just knew I had to go back, and try to get more understanding.

With this *intent* in my mind I went back to my place, and to my surprise Ajtosh was already there and said....'hey, I know you need some answers....are you ready to go back to the Creation Center?, I told him oh yes, more than ready, then he said lets go.

We arrived there, and the same ACC greeted us, I told him that I had many questions and wanted more understanding, he said.....'sure Marta, I will be very happy in helping you and answering your questions'.

My first question was, if everyone is naturally a creator, why is the need for Professional Creators, he answered......'Marta I will use an example, you have been an Architect on Earth, now everyone can imagine in their minds a beautiful house which is already an act of creation, but not everyone is an Architect, you had to go and learn the art of design, to know the materials of construction, structure that make possible the manifestation of the house, well in a way is the same what Professional Creators do'.

My second question was, if each of us creates our life and experiences, how this fit with the Creation Center, he answered.....'I will use again the Architect example, after you complete the design of a house and it is constructed, you don't go and tell the family who is going to live in the house how to furnish it, cleaning or mainten it, now don't forget that they came to you in the first place asking to design a house for them, which you did, meaning you took in consideration what they wanted, and then you designed the house that will suit the best to their needs.....in a way this basically what this Center does, but with more scope, because here we create patterns of possibilities, coming back to our Architect example, it will be as you created many houses for the family to choose which one they wanted manifested'.

Then I asked how the Disk or I-There fits in all this, he answered.........'like the families that asked you to design a house for them, and after just lived in the house with entire freedom, maybe at some point they will come back to you for some re-disign...LOL, now Marta, everything is connected, we are not separated from you or anyone else, you see WE are ONE, any of our creations here, in a way could be said that are also creations of all of you too, the problem is in your limited concepts of what you are, on Earth you still see all of you separated from each other, you see yourselves separeted from the animals and nature, and there resides the problem, self-awareness doesn't mean separation, I'm aware of myself and at the same time I'm aware of being ONE with everything, but to realize that is part of your discovery lessons on Earth....then when we say that here in the Creation Center are creators Beings, you insist in seeing them as separated from you, which is not the case, everything is a conjoint creation with the purpose of joy and fulfillment, WE being ONE create possibilities of experience for the ONE manifested in many'.
I told him that this was a great explanation, then he said.....'now, comming back to the Architect example, of course our *materials* are different to the ones you used on Earth for your house designs, we work with dimensional time, multidimensional space and energy units/concsciousness that are also self-aware and have propensities, in a way could be said that we work with mental concepts that are manifested as multidimensional patterrns of possibilities, now and this is hard for you to understand, bacause consciousness have propensities, there is kind of mobility, none of those creations are as finished products, you could say that are self-creative too, the best way to see those creations will be as master plans which contains inside endless possibilities of creation too'.
Then he said....'remember the filament that contained the information of DNA for some specie in your plane, well what this filament contained was the patterns for many possibilities, all the ones that will be suitable to the conditions of this precise specie, now the specie will choose which one to manifest in their own realm, you see there is not only one physical Earth, there are many physical dimensional Earths, I think you call that parallel Earths, because you are not aware of them, doesn't mean they don't exists, is just that you are aware of only one, then this specie exists simultaneously in some of those Earths, and the specie of each Earth will choose the DNA more suitable to their conditions, but all the possibilities will get manifested'.
He continued........'Marta is the same as when what you call your Disk creates a new personality, it endows the new personality with many characteristics and inclinations, but is the personality choice to expand that and enrich it, or ignore those inclinations and grow in a different way, both will be valid, nothing is an ABSOLUTE creation, any creation has mobility, it can't be otherwise'.

After those explanations, I thought that it was enough for my second visit and I wanted to remember all he said, then I thanked him for his answers.
I said to Ajtosh that I thought this was a very interesting visit, thanked him and came back to C1

Thank you for listening.

LOVE
Marta

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Robert

Ex Member

Perception
Reply #203 - Dec 16^th, 2002 at 10:22pm

Can someone post something on Perception? I realized that no matter how I think/feel about something, it all depends on my perception. Is there such thing as TRUTH? REAL? Because, what is real and truth to one person... can be false and unreal to another. i have from time to time try to use feelings and logics to sort of answers the big questions like... where did the universe come from? i realized two things... ONE either the universe was always here OR TWO the universe is "nothing" and does not "exist" ... whatever words those mean.. well, to someone else, they might percieve differently, scientist believe in the BIG BANG theory, religion believes God created us... seems like all perceptions are either truth OR false to another... how can you know what is "real"? for example, our dreams we consider "unreal" because we compare it to our waking moment... but who is to judge which is "real" ... has anyone who explored the "after-life" dealt with this with their guides or helper? ... i mean, if WE/MIND/GOD created this illusion of falsehood, and TRUTH exist, how would we know/feel that it is the actual TRUTH and not another illusion? well, thank you

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Bruce Moen

Ex Member

Re: Perception / Interpreter Overlay
Reply #204 - Dec 17^th, 2002 at 7:57am

Robert,

>> I realized that no matter how I think/feel about something, it all depends on my perception. Is there such thing as TRUTH? REAL? Because, what is real and truth to one person... can be false and unreal to another. <<

Great question. I agree with you completely that it all comes down to the nature of our perception. In my view perception, at least within nonphysical realities, is a two step process.

Let's say that I've shifted my focus of attention to the vicinity of some nonphysical object and I'm attempting to determine the Truth about what that object is. To my understanding the component of my consciousness I call the Perceiver begins to gather information about that object and bring it into my subconscious awareness. That information comes in "nonphysical forms." It comes as impressions, feelings, emotions, knowings, images, sounds, etc. And these enter my awareness at a subconscious level.

As each "bit" of information is brought into my awareness at that subconscious level the component of my consciousness, the one I call the Interpreter, locates the nearest similar thing stored in my pre-existing memory, and brings that nearest similar thing into my conscious awareness.

So, I am not consciously perceiving what is "really there" instead I am perceiving the nearest similar thing, or a series of nearest similar things, from my previous experience and memory.

In my view the nature of our perception precludes us from "seeing in absolute true" what this object is, instead we are always seeing what I call an Interpreter Overlay. It's always our own interpretation of that object, never the actual object itself.

>>... seems like all perceptions are either truth OR false to another... <<

I would say that all perceptions are at once truth and false due to the nature of our perception. For each observer the perception of the object is as close to the truth as that person's Interpreter Overlay can get. And at the same time that Interpreter Overlay is never the absoulute truth about what that object is.

>> how can you know what is "real"? <<

I've decided that due to the nature of my perception, always perceiving my own individual Interpreter Overlay, determining what is real in absolute terms is probably not possible. But I still want to know what is "real" and what is not. My own solution to this dilemma has been to work toward getting closer to the Truth all the while knowing I'll probably never actually know the absolute Truth.

Take religions for example. Each one has its own beliefs and rules, and most claim to be the 'one true religion.' Yet if you compare the beliefs and rules from one religion to the next very often you find conflicting beliefs and rules. As a teenager I asked myself, which of these religions has the Truth? What I discovered is that if I researched the beliefs and rules of a large number of religions I discovered common threads running through all of them. My reasoning as a teenager was that what was common to all of them was probably closer to "the Truth" than any one of them.

I use the same approach to exploring and learning what our afterlife is like. Each explorer perceives There through their own Interpreter Overlay. None of us perceives the absolute Truth of what our afterlife is like. But, by comparing all of our accounts what is common between them is probably closer to the Truth than any one of us.

>> how would we know/feel that it is the actual TRUTH and not another illusion? well, <<

I guess I'd say that due to the nature of our perception the illusion contains the Truth, and by looking for what's common between the illusions we can get closer to the Truth. And for now, that's as close to the absolute Truth as any of us can get, at least that's my view.

Bruce

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Ginny

Ex Member

Gender:

Exploring with a Disk Member
Reply #205 - Dec 16^th, 2002 at 1:57pm

Hi everyone,

Got the urge to go into the afterlife this morning...so after going through what has become a quick preparatory process for me, I placed the intent to be in the 3D blackness and I was there. Once again, in feeling the immense 'space' of the 3D, I wanted to just languish in it like some kind of cosmic hot tub but I resisted this and began to look around for small deviations, or areas of the blackness that didn't seem to be made up of the same fabric. The same old, rather large, flat black circular area appeared dead ahead of me and I rejected it, thinking it wasn't a portal. A strong thought came through saying, "Yes it is. It's one you've used a great deal." Oh. Then another thought accompanied with a knowing feeling went through me, in essence saying that it was one portal I had either made or added to, or enlarged, because of a lot of use. I mentally answered with, What? The knowing feeling came again and I was puzzled over this but decided to look into it later and resumed scanning for more. ** And I just want to say here how excited and grateful I am to Bruce for introducing this 3D blackness way to explore. It's a good way to practice and become acquainted with using nonphysical senses. It just isn't a matter of 'seeing' these portals or areas of instant travel. I have to rely upon feeling/sensing them too. For me that seems to be the key when in the 3D (and everywhere in the afterlife).**

Anyhoo, I practiced opening up to what I was feeling, what I was watching, in the 3D, moving my eyes as Bruce said to do...look around...and one area suddenly appeared that kinda felt to be in relief from the alive black background. It just had an odd or different feel to it than the rest of the blackness, so I went for it, placing the intent to go to my F27 treehouse.

Next thing I knew, as had happened before, I could hear the windchimes before I could see or be aware of anything else. It's as if they help to ground me once There. I listened to different chimes, some deep with a heavy resonance, others tinkling a light and soft melody. I could feel and sense a breeze in the leaves and branches all around and then I was looking at the wide deck in sunshine, the two reclining lounge chairs...and as I walked over to have a seat I suddenly knew someone else was in the other recliner. I stopped and grinned, asking who it was, and a tall human figure stood and said something in greeting I didn't understand, but I knew it was a greeting of warmth. I then knew he was a Disk Family (my name for my I/There) member. I sat, he sat...and just as I asked who he was his whitish humanoid figure briefly changed to allow me to remember him ( I saw long black hair, strong facial features, tan colored clothing), and I certainly did. He's the American Indian who's loving reassurance, advice and even a few handy skills have always been with me throughout this physical life. When I focus in on his energy I always know it's him. He reached out and took my right hand and held it for a few minutes. I asked if the' Indian outfit' I had just seen was for my benefit and he nodded. I knew then I'd probbaly not need to see this outfit again as knowing his energy was enough.

I asked him why my Disk, for months, had been kind of lovingly pestering me to created this new place, my treehouse. I had a sense that this new place was a better meeting ground for all of us and I wondered why my first place, my Park, was no longer going to be used. He answered right away, saying that from the very beginning I had always wanted that F27 Park of mine to also be a refuge for animals. Yep, that was right. And later I welcomed people there too, anything or anyone feeling they were drawn to the energy there. He said all of that was good, and because of the increasing population there were too many energies, energies belonging to others that would have been a distraction for me. This made sense to me and I briefly wondered how busy the Park was now. I then squeezed his hand and said, "What is your name? I've never known your name!" He grinned and answered with something which must have had four to five syllables in it. I got that it was a difficult name to even pronounce. I was only able to catch the last syllable and asked him to pronounce it again, which he did, and I still couldn't repeat it. He thought this was funny and indicated that it wasn't important anyway. Recognition of his energy is what counted.

I could still feel my hand in his and I then held his with both hands, feeling a strong, square palm and long fingers. He felt to be such a patient and understanding person...and I also picked up a feeling of expectancy from him...as if he were waiting for what he already knew was going to happen next. I said something like, "uh oh..." with a laugh and he then gently wrapped his hands around mine and said big change was in store for me. I fought off a brief feeling of insecurity and asked if he was trying to tell me I'd be leaving the physical soon? No....inward changes. Okay. He said something about a new shift of awareness. Hmmmm. I then remembered the desire to possibly venture to the Hall of Remembering in F27 (one area of that place offers a technology whereby one can revisit other lives and who knows what else), before leaving C1 this morning, and asked if going there now had something to do with what he was talking about? I got back a "sort of" from him and he then said I didn't need to go to the Hall in order to accomplish such a journey. I could do it right there, here, in the treehouse. Well this was a novel idea. He said to lean back and just relax on my outdoor recliner...and I couldn't help but ask if whatever was about to happen---was this what it felt like being on a psychiatrist's couch? I got a smile from him and he indicated perhaps it was in a way. Oh boy.

He then stated that all my life I'd had a feeling about a woman from long ago who lived with or knew wolves really well...and that I had often wondered if I too had ever been a wolf. Yep. He told me to close my eyes and be calm...and to just feel what it's like to see from the inside out through the eyes of a wolf. As I did this all became black and I took a good minute to just be calm...and then I had a peculiar feeling come over me.

I was sitting high up in mountains. I could feel pebbles and clumps of grass underneath me as I moved my line of vision to take in a view of miles and miles of a mountainous region, to the best of my knowledge, I had never seen before. Vast valleys and gorges stretched out to my left, supporting jagged peaks looming up through layers of clouds. The area I was in was one of a high altitude, the air crisp, cold. I was in such a peaceful state of being, content to just observe, watch. I then sensed I was hearing something and I felt two big ears somewhere behind my eyes angle out to my left and downward. I couldn't see or smell what it was, but a brief motion picture of a rabbit scurrying around suddenly popped into my mind. As a wolf I just 'knew' it was a rabbit and I 'knew' where it was. And I guess I wasn't interested in dinner because I didn't feel a desire to give chase. I briefly wondered ( I momentarily moved my awareness slightly back to "Ginny") if animals often gain a knowing, in this way, about their environment. When I moved my attention forward again, back into being a wolf (only way I can describe it) something made me looked down and be attentive of my left paw, partially curled under me. I had a wound, a laceration near the do-claw, ---however you spell it. I sniffed and then licked this wound but didn't feel any pain, just a mild discomfort in that area. When that was done I resumed my observing, and I, as Ginny, then took note of experiencing moments where no information was running through me...moments that felt to be utterly blissful and trouble-free. It was a tranquility that I, as the human Ginny, rarely experience while conscious. The idea ran through me that this was normal for animals...and that perhaps this was an answer to a long held question of mine as to whether people's pets ever experience a great deal of boredom. It felt to me at that moment that they do, but they also have the ability to 'zone out' into this blissful state.

My attention was then drawn to my right and I then 'knew' a human was approaching...and I knew which human so I remained calm. Within a few seconds my ears were then registering something, noises the human was making within trees and bush....and a woman emerged from a forest above me. As she approached I saw she had wrapped around her some kind of large animal skin with fur on the outside, and what appeared to be buckskin boots with I guess leather cording tied around them. She sat near me, muttering words or sounds that didn't make sense to me (to Ginny). I was suddenly engulfed with a brief knowing that I was registering smells, her smells I guess. Her hair was long, dark and partially braided in thin rows around her face. The braids looked as if they'd not been unbraided for a long time. She was moving her hands under her animal skin covering and I as a wolf knew what she was doing. She produced a thick slab of dark red dried meat, cut a portion off and handed it to me. I focused on hungrily chewing, dropping a portion too long to get into my mouth. My teeth kind of pulverized the meat in a couple of chews and I was on to the remainder til all was eaten. I felt her stroke me, my fur, along the right side of my face. Moving back I wanted, as Ginny, to see her face and I did. Her skin was medium brown, a wide, pronounced mouth and slightly protruding lips. She had a heavier brow than woman usually have.

We both were then drawn to where a part of the mountain we were on tumbled downward at a sharp angle and I knew more wolves were approaching. Within seconds around seven to eight gray wolves ( one was black) were leaping and frolicking below us, making their way t

"Intelligence is knowing that which is important." Albert Einstein

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Ginny

Ex Member

Gender:

Page 2
Reply #206 - Dec 16^th, 2002 at 2:02pm

Within seconds around seven to eight gray wolves ( one was black) were leaping and frolicking below us, making their way towards our position. As they zigzagged around jagged outcroppings and bounded up to us some lowered their tails and let out short whining sounds as they circled the woman, who was now standing (I was sitting up). I watched the obvious display of affection, a few wolves approaching me to gave a friendly sniff or two, and it was apparent the woman was in some way a leader to the pack.

And then, just like that, I was back on my deck in the chair staring at a part of my tree. I looked over at my Indian friend and asked, "Was she an American Indian?" He said yes, Indian, but not in America. I then said, "So you were that woman, in that physical life.", and he answered, no. He said I was. And I was also the wolf in that physical life. This blew me away, also confused me. I then had a rote of sorts but I'm afraid I can't quite remember all of it, but in essence I got that Disk members are capable of performing some kind of split in energy or personality, whereby both energetic parts can experience a life together.

He then moved into my treehouse and after a few seconds of trying to absorb what he had just said I followed him. A large fire was burning in a huge, white plaster, rounded fireplace. A comfortable looking couch and stuffed chairs with coffee table stood in front of the orange flames. I walked over to windows that seemed to be comprise most of the wall space in the house and knew there wasn't any glass...it wasn't necessary here. I then moved into the central area of the house, or more like a great room, where the tree passed through the wood flooring and up through the roof. Beyond, in another section of the house I haven't even visited yet (in a conscious state) where more people sitting, talking. I knew they were more Disk members. Started feeling as if this treehouse was 'our' house, not just mine.----- Shocked

)

And then I could feel it was time to return, so I extended a 'see ya guys'--thought towards everyone and came back to C1.

Thanks for listening and much love to all,

Ginny

"Intelligence is knowing that which is important." Albert Einstein

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Ex Member	(No subject) Reply #207 - Dec 31^st, 1969 at 8:00pm
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gordon phinn

Ex Member

Higher Self Dialogue #4
Reply #208 - Dec 13^th, 2002 at 5:45pm

Sunday Nov.5th/2000

Gordon: I felt your presence while swimming an hour ago and thought now would be a good opportunity for another chat.
HS: Yes Gordon, now would be as good a "time" as any. Let me take up where we left off a few days ago, when you didn't have the time to write anything down. In response to your question, I had said that I exist just below the "god" level of consciousness and that my conception of how I was spawned could be conveyed by the words "spat out of the limitless ocean of understanding to feel myself as suddenly somehow unique".
Gordon: And you explored that uniqueness by sending parts of yourself down the energy highway to explore the territory there and bring back reports?
HS: Right. Now the early explorers didn't descend too far down the ladder, but they could still feel and hear me as they went about their lives.
Gordon: They weren't completely physical then
HS: No, they were at what you would call the astral level.
Gordon: What were they learning there?
HS: That they were distinct entities with individual traits, but joined at the level of higher mind.
Gordon: I get the feeling it was a kind of eden.
HS: That would be one way of describing.
Gordon: And is that the source of the wispy notions, somewhere in the depths of our souls, of some beautiful life lived in harmony and love with all beings in nature?
HS: Yes, and it is renewed every time you're living in the upper astral between lives.
Gordon: So we return with a wry smile of recognition?
HS: Sometimes with whoops of delight, and others with the rueful, and maybe remorseful, twinge of "how could I have possibly forgotten all this?"
Gordon: That all rings true for me and I guess that's because I've experienced it and forgotten. Plato's theory of knowledge and all. Now what if the soul doesn't make it to the upper astral?
HS: Well when it gets stuck at a lower level, the heavenly experience seems an inaccessible myth or just a nasty lie served up by an ignorant and deceitful clergy. Of course everyone gets there eventually, even if it takes hundreds of years.
Gordon: When they're "down there", hemmed in by whatever ignorance and denial, you must have a very hard time communicating with them.
HS: Yes, the link becomes extremely tenuous, with just a tiny ripple of energy running up and down.
Gordon: And if they acknowledge you at all, it's as some tattered remnant of some god figure?
HS: Or some angelic presence, or maybe a tribal shaman/medicine man figure, whatever fits in with their belief system.
Gordon: You'll excuse me if I suggest that begs the question, ...are you my higher self, of just a figment of my current belief system?
HS: You're excused. There's proabably no reliable way for you to 'verify' my existence, any more than you can verify the objective existence of your conscience.
Gordon: It's another of those unquantifyables.
HS: Yes, and once again I ask you to "feel" rather than "think". Sceptics will always be able to say you're imagining things and call your sanity into question, and you won't be able to do a thing about it. You'll just have to grin and bear it. You know I'm here because you can feel me; other souls will know when they open to feeling theirs. But the experience is not transferable. You'll probably always wonder if you're just chattering away to another hidden aspect of yourself. Well, you are. I am a hidden aspect of you. You are my child out to play in the fields of consciousness and I await your return with a pleasing sense of familiarity.
Gordon: And when I re-merge with you, I will no longer need to post such questions?
HS: One and one is one.
END

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Marta

Ex Member

BST Retrieval!
Reply #209 - Dec 13^th, 2002 at 5:13pm

Hi everyone!

I was just enjoying the 3D blackness, when I detected a kind of purple turbulence, I directed my attention there and I found myself moving through a purple funnel, then suddenly an image of a woman appeared in front of me, dressed in old costume, like from many centuries ago.

The scene opened in my view and I *saw* a wierd place, in which many people were dressed with cloths from different epochs, like a mixture, but one thing all they have in common, they all seemed to be waiting for something and I *sensed* an incredible feeling of guilt.

Then I asked the woman I saw, what they were waiting, she answered to be punished by God, we know we are dead and now God has to punish us for our sins.

Oh boy, never before I had encouter a place like that, I asked her which one was her sin, she answered, I killed my husband with poison, he always was beating me and the children, and I know I have to be punished for that. Then I asked her name.....'Jane...Wellwood', then I got the imp. that her life was in Scotland and that she died in 1442.

Then I began telling her that no one is going to be punished, I said don't you see the time you have been waiting and no punishment has come?
I told her that the only punishment is the one we do to ourselves by the feelings of guilt, that if she could understand that, then she could move on and go to a place where she will have all the help she needs.

I said, do you want that?, she said really I won't be punished? I'm really tired of waiting and also I have been seen some of us to disappear, we thought they have been taken to Hell, but for me this is very strange because they took the ones with minor sins, and others with horrible sins are still here without punishment, is just very strange that God will do something like that.

Then I told her that no one has been taken to Hell, that the ones that already left were people ready to move on, that they understood that there is no punishment to wait for.

Then I *saw* two Helpers right there like two balls of light, I asked if she could see the Helpers, she answered yes, I told her to go with them that they will take her to a better place in which she will have all the love and help she needs.
I saw her moving toward the Helpers, and the three of them faded away from my perception, then I came back to C1.

Thanks for listening.

LOVE
Marta

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