Hi I   fell asleep on my settee and had this really vivid dream,i dreamt that i was begging God to take me home to my dad,i was telling him that i can't take much more of this world and i wanted to go home as i felt i had learned what i needed to learn and there was no where left to go anymore.

Then i was with my children and i was talking to them and i felt my heart turning over 3 times and then i fell to the floor on my back and in this dream it felt so real that i was actually dieing and i was feeling so happy,as i felt myself leaving my body,i suddenly woke up.

This dream felt so real,i wondered if i had actually had the exerience of dieing,or that i had been given a vision of the way i would die in the future.

Love and God Bless  Love Juditha

Dear Ralph & Juditha, I am so moved by your posts & wish I could help in some way, if it's not too presumptious of me. 
Juditha, I have also dreamed I was dying - in one dream I lay on the bathroom floor, losing strength & consciousness; I told my small daughter not to be afraid, as it was the same as if a little bird was dying.

The dream made me aware that I was not fully interacting in my current life; that I had a responsibility to "take this incarnation seriously".  Perhaps that also applies to you?  I find that once one reaches a certain point on one's path, the world has very little appeal any more.  One sees through the glamour & facade of life - all the pointless ambitions; the striving & growing up; being an adolescent with all one's vain hopes for a life that finally ends in suburbia; the mindless urge to procreate & fulfill the biological imperative. . . . all so that we can produce offspring who we mould into social beings with the same silly hopes & fears that we had, only to grow old & wither as we do ourselves.  It's the circle, or wheel of becoming, & we need to let go of it.

But not by opting out, or shooting or drowning or gassing ourselves or cutting our veins.  We have to EARN our "death".  If someone were to  attack you, try to stab you or kill you in some violent way, Ralph, I am certain your body would automatically leap to its own defence, even if you consciously wished to slough it off. As it says in the Bhagavad Gita, we are forced to act by material nature.

I sympathise so very much with you, though, as I have been there myself.  I can only recommend letting go. . . .only material things that can be taken away from you. Looking at the stars at night is a great way of putting things into perspective, I find.

I don't know you or about your life, but someone I loved for many years (but had kept away from, for fear of distrupting his life) took his own life by gassing himself - his third attempt, after failing at cutting the wrists. He felt he had nothing to live for after having a stroke & being unable to perform - he was a classical musician.  I met him in the astral, & all the darkness, depression & pain was still with him - he had not left it behind.  His words, "I keep slipping away into the darkness" will always be with me.

So please do not take your own life, no matter how hard the circumstances.  According to my understanding, the only exception is in the case of severe terminal illness, when death should be consciously chosen & entered into awake. 
But if there is even one thing that one can still do to help some other being, even if it is just feeding a wild bird, there is still something left to be done here in 3-D.

Peace & wholeness to you, & may no blood be spilled.

Ralph Buskey wrote on Oct 24^th, 2011 at 10:51pm:


Hello,

I read your response to Juditha with much understanding. It seems like it's impossible for "sensitives" to exist day-to-day with all the misery and strife in this world.

Have you come to find a way to cope with these feelings? If so, would you mind sharing with us? I am not suicidal, but I do feel overwhelmed and unable to understand all the hatefulness and selfishness on this plane. I find it insulting when people say "just don't think about it" as if it's possible to just not notice all the suffering (like changing a tv channel). I'm always left with the burning question...if the point is PUL and transcending the ego, how do we acknowledge the pain and suffering and help society versus just tuning it out?

I hope you've found some peace in life and have come to know how important your existence is. I know that feels empty on the days when it becomes too much, but your life serves a purpose and it takes courage to continue. Sometimes, it's necessary to take it one day, one hour, even one minute at a time, but it is possible. Nobody promised it would be easy. In fact, it's not easy. Yet, the lessons come in overcoming the hard stuff. We open our hearts to new experiences each time we commit to persevering in spite of all the roadblocks. I send you good thoughts for all good things.

Regards,
mj