This isn't really a dream. At least, I don't think it is. But I don't know where else to put it. Besides, if I told it to a non-Board type, I would call it a dream.

Preface:
As I've mentioned else where, after being out of work for a very long time, I finally got a job about 9 months ago, and after 3 months, as I agreed to, I went on nights, which means I work 11:30 PM to 8 AM. This kind of interferes with the normal sleep pattern (not to mention social life). I can be lively until about 4 AM and then sometimes I really have to fight that crash. Then I have to drive home.  I still haven't found the right pattern (or supplement) that makes it work optimally. Even when I stay alert all night and drive home (after an AM cup of coffee) I sometimes just "crash" after I get in the driveway (not the car, just my waking conciousness). I have even fallen sleep with the car running when it was still cold out and I wanted to hear the end of a BBC world news story; what a waste of gas. Now I make sure I turn the car off before I finish listening to a radio program. Lately as soon as I get the car off, I seem to just doze away. It is quite easy to fall asleep while stillin the car. It actually is not pleasant but I can't seem to wake up enough to go into the house. The car is not comfortable for sleeping sitting up and I get a cramp in my upper back. My head falls forward and that becomes uncomfortable. But I get into a weird sleep state and it is very difficult to wake up enough to get inot the house. I call it being stuporous. (The trick to avoiding it is to shut the radio off before i shut the car off and make myself get out). I can get into this state even when I felt OK driving home. I wish I knew what my brain waves were doing.

Dream:
so I did it again yesterday morning. Actually I hadn't felt sleepy all night and felt OK driving home, so I was surprised that this happened again. I was definitely stuporous. It became physically uncomfortable. My head kept falling forward and my neck started to hurt, but I could only wake up enough to lift my head and then I would be "out" again. I kept straining to lift my head. At one point I seemed to be trying to lift my head from outside my body, but I didn't catch the absurdity of this. I would lift my head up as though I was beside my body and using my arms, and then I would be experiencing it falling back down from the inside perspective. This happened several times. I finally managed to wake up enough to open the car door and sit up OK. I just felt grumpy and groggy and didn't analyze this until a little later.

Analysis:
I started laughing when I realized how absurd my memory of trying to lift my head from the outside was. I recalled something that was posted on Michael S's 90-day odyssey thread:

http://afterlife-knowledge.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi?num=1268502700/30

Quote:


So I think I was having sleep paralysis when I couldn't lift my head from the inside and that my astral me didn't "get it" and tried to lift my head from the outside. Silly me!

So I think all those times I can't seem to wake up that I am somehow flitting between physical and astral.

It sort of makes sense that that could happen then. I'm tired but it is daylight and I am trying to stay awake.

This is peculiar because I have tried from time to time to achieve a state like that for quite a while, but with no success. I'm just not sure sitting in my car after driving home from working all night is the place I want to do that! I really have to struggle to achieve this state,and now life has handed me a situation where it happens when it shouldn't.

Maybe I can figure out how to use this to further explore this state; if I can get into the house first. I'll have to set up a chair where I have to sit. I can set the radio to Morning Edition and BBC News easily enough. Something about the enclosed nature of a car makes it easier to do this; not sure how to create that.

Well, I have managed to discipline myself to not stay in the car when I get home. So I come into the house. I have tried sitting up in a chair so I can perhaps at least recall any dream I might have when I fall asleep, which I inevitably do, but I haven't recalled anything on waking..yet.

So today I came into the house but decided to check some stuff on the web rather than sleep. The radio is playing in the background. Maybe that's important for me. So, I'm browsing, and then I'm drowsing.

I dreamed I was sqautting on the edge of something, maybe a swimming pool, maybe an abyss, I don't know. Then I jumped down in my dream, off the edge.

This caused me to physically "jump" (a little thing like you do when something startles you)...my body tried to move, and I woke up.

Obviously the physical and the astral were close together but I still haven't sorted the differences out.

I realized what had happened when I looked up and saw the computer. My subconcious mind must be trying to beat me over the head with the symbolism. Clearly this effort to stay awake when I am very tired is significant for me to have these experiences.

I was not reading about jumping over an edge before this happened.