Hi PhantasyMan and Recoverer,
thank you very much for responding.

I actually have dealt several times with "parts" of me, some appeared as other/past lives, some as semi-personal aspects, and some as traits. I, so to say, brought them to rest, at least I thought so. After a little while of relative peacefulness, unwanted emotions and related issues came back. It is like ending a cure too early, before the infection is entirely drained.

""I've noticed that my limiting thought patterns have been dealt with in layers. I deal with one, and then it becomes time to deal with another one.  Energetic blocks have occurred in the same parts of my body more than once. Each time for a different issue. Each time an issue is cleared, energy can flow more freely through this area.  When our energy isn't able to flow freely, things can seem unbalanced.

Using Bruce's lingo, consider how our interpreters work. They respond to stimuli according to our relevant psychological conditioning. Sometimes parts of our conditioning are suppressed, until we are ready to deal with them. When such aspects come to life, they become a part of our interpreters loop as it creates our responses to stimuli.  Sometimes our own energy moving around can cause our interpreter to do so.  In my experience, my higher self/guidance brings up hidden aspects according to when I am ready to deal with them. We can cause such aspects to come up prematurely if we engage in certain types of energy work.

I went through a period where I meditated three times a day. Sometimes for as long as two hours. I would do this while my kundalini was running. Things became a little hairy for a while. My spirit guidance said I brought things to life too quickly, and I would have to go through an adjustment period.""

 In fact, it is like something within me is rebelling. I can get easily angry about things I can't change/aren't worth it. I take it as symptoms that I'm not balanced, that something is not right. As well, I know for quite a while I have fears influencing me, fears of loss, of getting hurt, overpowered, or treated unfairly.

""I won't say that I never become angry because this isn't true. I've learned to minimize my anger and not go too far with it.  Here are some key elements to dealing with it:
1. Afirm to yourself how important it is to grow spiritually, and when challenging situations come up, make a point of remembering how important it is to grow spiritually and not let challenges get the best of you.
2. We are provided with an ego essence for the challenges and learning opportunities it provides. It is never truly us, just something we make use of for a while, like this physical body.
3. Reflect upon moments when you have become angry, and realize how it is never worth while and usually not justifiable to do so.
4.  The next time the urge to become angry arrises,  without trying to immediately figure out the particulars of the situation, bring the anger to a halt on the basis of what number 3 revealed to you. You can go over the particulars later on.
5. It also helps to see how things work out for other people who become angry in an unnecessary way.
6. When you become angry, consider how there are so many people in the World who have it much worse than you. I've found that when I reflect in this way, it is hard to take my self pity seriously. Related to this, reflect upon how much grace is in your life. For example, the fact of  how you are consciously spiritual.
7. Because you are spiritual, you know that everything will work out wonderfully in the end.
8. Make a point of trying to live according to love as much as possible. When you do so,  you can deal with anger without having to engage in suppression.

I'm not suggesting that certain occurences in the World won't cause you to become angry. For example, when many people are caused to suffer because of what an irresponsible World leader brought into existence.  However, dwelling on such anger doesn't accomplish anything. It just adds to the negative vibrations in this World.

Regarding fear, I believe our ego essence is programmed to become afraid of just about anything.  We need to learn to not listen to it. Prove it wrong often.  What really helps is for one to see that the spirit being one truly is, can never be harmed.  It also helps to make a spirit connection to light beings we can trust.

One thing that's helped me get over my fears is to use a note pad and pen. When we are confused about something it is hard to think about all of the thoughts that relate to a fear clearly. When we write all of the thoughts down, they are all there for us to consider. Plus I've found that writing helps me connect to my higher self. It provides the space.  I usally write down these thoughts in the form of a list. After writing the list I'll go over each item and intellectually make certain that each point is correct. It helps me make certain that I have been honest with myself, and this helps clear away uncertainty. Next, I'll try to feel how each item on the list is true, and release as much of the unwanted thought pattern as I can. Sometimes I'll need to go over a list several times before it has an effect. I'll go over it at different times.

My spirit guidance has also helped me tremendously with getting over my fears. Partly by creating various types of experiences.""


 What makes me tired is, I can't seem to be able to find the right way to get these things straight. It's like those little sneaky children, they hide from my attempts to get rid of them (or reconcile), like dangerous insects hiding in your clothes. Maybe it's just a matter of time, I don't know. Practicing "letting the negative things go" seems to be a slow, but promising method though.

""It does take persistence. I've had moments where I would become frustrated and would wonder, am I ever going to overcome this thought pattern? In a way it is good that it is this difficult, because if our thought patterns were less solid, we would be a different person from day to day.""

 This all makes me think of attachments. Isn't it the fundamental problem? To care about the loss of something/someone, and the resulting feeling of threat/fear. From this, for me it seems to be an alluring perspective to end all these complicated attachments, but this seems to be very difficult as long as I am living as a person. Actually, when I try this in meditation, I reach a fear barrier which seems to say: "If you move beyond this threshold, you will end your existence (at least the physical existence)".

""I'm not certain what you mean by the last sentence. Perhaps you mean it in a no time context. When we are human, we tend to experience everything on a moment by moment basis. Perhaps when we move beyond such a way of thinking, we become one with our eternal truth, and experience our entire history in a flash. This should be okay, because we'll wake up to the moment where everything is perfect for everybody.

Perhaps you mean that you need your body based identity in order to exist.  I believe the key to overcoming this is to find how security, knowledge, completeness, purpose, happiness, peace and love are truly found.  The more we can see that these are never found by being a body based person, the more we will be able to let go of false limitations.

Regarding meditation, I've found that what works best during meditation, is to tune into a feeling of love and inner peace as much as possible, and then examine a thought pattern that limits us while in this state of being. Often when we see beyond the pattern that limits us, we'll find that our meditation becomes deeper. Sometimes we have to examine a thought pattern a number of times, before we finally overcome it. ""

...but no one said it's easy, right?

""If someone says it's easy, this someone probably didn't take the journey.""
Spooky