A new form of Dark Matter has been reported by RGH Laboratories in San Gabriel, California. It is called Govermentium. (symbol Gov)

Govermentium has one Nutteron, 25 Assistant Nutterons, 88 Deputy Nutterons, and 199 Assistant Deputy Nutterons, for inertial mass number 312. These are held together by forces called Morons, which are surrounded by vast number of Kleptons that suck up energy, called Peons.

Govermentium begins with forces that manifest as Electons, but loses connection to pre-Electon qualities rapidly, becoming inert. However, Govermentium is easily detected, because it impedes everything with which it comes into contact. For example, a minute amount of Govermentium can cause reactive failures in processes normally taking a few seconds, making them take many days to complete, if at all.

The half life of Govermentium is 4 years. It does not decay, but undergoes a reorganization in which numbers of Nutterons and Deputy Nutterons exchange places. Because each exchange causes a number of Morons to become Nutterons, these reorganizations form Isodopes. Often, Virtual Morons are attracted, so Govermentium tends to increase inertial mass over time.

As the number of Morons increases, a concentration may be reached called a Critical Morass. If catalyzed with money, this converts into Administratium (symbol Ass), an form that sucks just like Govermentium, since it has half as many Peons, but twice the number of Morons.

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