Chrisbaby9305
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Hi,
This is my first entry, so please bear with me.
I am with a bunch of people that, in reality I do know and we are all talking and having fun. Then I see my fiancee walk by! I yell out to him (Chris) and he keeps walking. I run after him and I am very frusterated that he isn't listening to me. By this time, the scene is only the 2 of us and the landscape is barren--no trees, just all sand and what looks like a large rock, or maybe a large pile of sand--I start begging him to stop. He stops and says in a very mean tone of voice something like, "What, Baby? I don't have time to listen to this right now"! He continues to walk away. I plead with him, "Baby, wait! You don't understand! You are dead, and I can't talk to you anymore! Oh my God, I can't believe you are right here! Please don't go!" (I am fully aware in my dream that the reality is that he is dead). I start to cry, partly because I am so happy to see him and partly because he is being so mean to me. He doesn't believe me when I tell him he's dead and he gets angry with me. He throws a heavy glass ashtray at me (it's an ashtray from our garage where he spent most of his time when he was alive) like a frisbee behind his back, and just when it hits me in the forehead, I wake up. After I wake, I am very excited and so overcome with sadness at the same time. I sob uncontrollably for hours, and I am not one to cry--maybe a tear or 2 here and there. I can't stop.
Maybe I should give a little insight to the whole situation. We were together for almost 6 years--he was the love of my life and unfortunately fell into drugs (meth) and everything and everyone that goes with it. We were fighting the last year of his life because of his actions. He was not the man I fell in love with anymore. He was shot by a drug dealer, in front of the drug dealer's house on Labor Day weekend of 2005, and from what I understand, died instantly. He was 35. He left me with our nearly 6 month old baby girl and my 17 year old son from a previous marriage. We were devastated by his death, but I must say that my belief system has changed drastically since his death. I was told (by Chris--who had read the Bible cover to cover 6 times, as he had several 1-3 year prison sentences and had the need to find the "Truth" about God) that when we die, we go into the ground and we know nothing until the Resurrection. About 6 months ago, my 1 1/2 year old daughter came running into my room with a picture of Chris and she was excitedly yelling, "Daddy! Daddy!" She had not known a picture of Chris before that, as it was too difficult for me to look at them. She just knew! There have been many other instances of little 'things' that had to be him! Since his death, I have started to record my dreams of him so that I don't forget. I will post those later, but I want to know why he is so angry and hateful towards me in this dream. This was the first one I had of him, and it happened about 10 months after his death. I had a friend tell me that Chris contacted him by cell phone in his dream, and that was only a couple of months after his death. Any insight to this dream would be appreciated. Thank you!
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Deceased fiancee appears angry at 1st (Read 2705 times)
