supposing both wives have already passed on,  when you die, do you get  to choose who you would like to reunite with or spend "eternity" with?

I suppose that the only way either of them ever became wives in the first place is because you have already spent eternity with the souls that they are.  You worked out some level of karma with one or both and will either work on other lessons with them or move on to work on other lessons with other souls.  Who ultimately knows?  You might even become one of their wives or ex-wives if you haven't already been one.

it's so hard to fathom from a human perspective. there's the whole jealousy factor that simply does not exist in heaven, and it's hard to remove yourself from that emotion. as the second wife, my human emotion say that i would be crushed if my husband chose to be with his ex instead of me. while it' s not easy, i can try to rise above that emotion and realize that it's so much more involved that that. perhaps the "more" is not for me to understand right now. but as a human being on this earth, i want to believe that i will spend eternity with my husband.

You already are spending an eternity with him, both now and after you both pass.  And you may also be spending that same time with the ex-wife...again, you may simply exchange roles with each other. 

My understanding is that we seldom have extensive or meaningful interaction in any incarnation with souls whom we do not have a long association and deep love.  The first wife has brought out some sense of enmity/jealousy in you and how you deal with it will help you to evaluate what you have learned from this lesson...this is the meaning of life.  Will your interactions with her be based in love or in fear?  It sounds like both your souls may have planned to provide each other just such a lesson.  And it may be that your husband was simply the catalyst for the lesson to be learned between you two wives.

I don't think exes are much of an issue - we didn't stay married to them in life, so I'd guess most of them aren't at the very top of our soul-mate lists.

Deceased spouses is what I've always wondered about.

"Some Sadducees who say there is no resurrection cam to Jesus and asked him a question:..."There were 7 brothers.  The first married, and when he died, left no children; and the second married her and died, leaving no children; and the third likewise; none of the 7 left children.  Last of all, the woman herself died.  In the resurrection whose wife will she be?  For all 7 had married her."  Jesus replied, "Is not this the reason you are wrong, know neither the Scriptures nor the power of God:  For when they rise from the dead, they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like the angels in heaven (Mark 12:20-25)."" 

Cricket wrote on Feb 26^th, 2010 at 6:07pm:

I don't think exes are much of an issue - we didn't stay married to them in life, so I'd guess most of them aren't at the very top of our soul-mate lists.

The fact that they were in your life gave them some level of soul acquaintance/association and karmic energy...we usually do not marry people we have no known understanding of or karmic obligation to.  In order to be an ex you once had to be the one...and to be the one there had to be something there, usually karmic in nature. It is a mistake to think that not staying married in life is an indicator of their significance to you in your spiritual life or the significance they may have had in your life lessons.  Some of the best lessons one can learn are those from the worst situations one may face.

Of course they may end up with ether of them but with someone they truly love. People get married for a number of reasons. Not all of them are over true PUL. This is where the whole soul mates thing comes in. True soul mates rarely get married. (Opinion only) Because if you truly loved one another, why wouldnt you want your soul mate to experience a lifetime learning over one that repeats itself?

hi    the one thing i don't want is to see that monster from an unknown planet that i married and divorced looking at me for all eternity,i'm hoping he will be two plains down from where i'll be

love and god bless  love juditha

wrote on Feb 27^th, 2010 at 3:40pm:

hi    the one thing i don't want is to see that monster from an unknown planet that i married and divorced looking at me for all eternity,i'm hoping he will be two plains down from where i'll be love and god bless  love juditha

If I may, I would like to ask if you researched the spiritual reasons for your marriage to him in the first place?  This is meant rhetorically because it is certainly personal and not necessarily fit for a messageboard.

In my own case, I married the woman I had pre-birth planned to marry.  I almost married another with whom I had an incredible connection but issues always arose that prevented any permanent commitment. It turns out the other woman, a very close soul mate, was only playing a bit part in this life and left a blessing with me; something I had to have to move forward.  After I received it, marriage to my wife, another close soul mate, fell into place with unbelievable ease.  I had karmic lessons to learn with my wife which are being resolved by our union and life together.

My research into my relationships with others have also netted wonderfully gratifying confirmation of the roles we played for each other in previous lives and the lessons we have for each other in this lifetime.  A childhood enemy is now one of my closest friends...but as kids we hated each other and had to learn how to deal with how we made each other feel.

From my standpoint, all is love and our ability to see that love and find that love through the fog and emotion of our third dimensional lives is the greatest lesson we can learn.

With love, Scott

hi scott  i am forgetting about why were were together spiritually and i probably needed to learn from him and him from me ,i think my problem is that i am finding it so hard to forgive him for all his hurt,but maybe oneday i will be able to forgive him as with all things time heals.

love and god bless  love juditha

When you're ready forgive.....you'll feel lighter without carrying that baggage...

:) D

I'm pretty sure my ex was a "place holder"...kept me from hooking up with someone that I wouldn't be able/willing to shake loose from, until my "soul mate" got to me.  I'm sure our exes are important in our lives, here and there, but not necessarily "big deal" important.

I have to agree with a part of the scriptures that Don points out. There is no need of the institution of marriage in a place some call heaven. There are no secrets. No carnal lust. How you feel will be as open to read as a book. Thats not to say there will not be opportunities for commitment to others. That will be there just as is it here. The difference being that the reality of you will be apparent. There can be no agenda other than love.
Juditha, I believe that only through love and forgiveness can the door open. Whether talking about Hitler or about an ex husband. Hold on to the love you felt when you were happy with sharing your life with him, and let go of the rest. Move on because holding this grudge is allowing him to remain in control of you. If you believe God can forgive him, you should also. 

Cricket wrote on Feb 28^th, 2010 at 2:13pm:

I'm pretty sure my ex was a "place holder"...kept me from hooking up with someone that I wouldn't be able/willing to shake loose from, until my "soul mate" got to me.  I'm sure our exes are important in our lives, here and there, but not necessarily "big deal" important.

They may not be a "big deal", but what got them there in the first place?  I went through a huge amount of stuff before I actually committed to a wife...it wasn't going to be an easy thing to commit to what I expected at the time to be a lifelong relationship...although after 20 years it is becoming tenuous.