If I may share quite a few things here & ask for input. . .hope it's not too long & boring!?

Lately I have been dreaming of performing rescues, usually not very successfully, on animals, which is what I "intend" my energy to be used for in the astral levels. . but I seem to loose focus & get very down about the conditions these creatures believe themsleves to be in.  I ended up carrying an enourmous black pig over my shoulder the other night, & was deeply distressed as I could do no more than send love energy through the palms of my hands to 2 whales who were "dying" . . . .then there was a strange dream about being shown around a school on a huge round ship, & being unable to help several cows destined for a "slaughter demonstration".  I sat on the lower 'deck" of this "ship" in darkness, looking down into "fathoms deep" pale greeen water that had a clear, luminous quality to it, until swarms of "aqua-soldiers" approached just under the surface.  I was tempted to throw myself into the water in sadness at the way things were (I can't swim) but was woken by my alarm, feeling really strange & disconnected.  

On another occasion, I asked for a Guide to help me, & 2 very tall wispy beings appeared next to me - when I asked their names, I was told I was too abstract in my thinking so their names would be meaningless to me; they said they were always there & that I had been granted 'special dispensation to work out my karma in the astral"

And (last one!) I dreamed of an old friend, who I have not seen for over 20 years - he told me he had died.  (The next morning I googled him & found an obit for April last year!) He didn't seem lost or unhappy.

There is a particular feel to these semi-lucid dreams, making them more like astral experiences, but i was not aware of the process of actually leaving the body (haven't been able to since a minor stroke 3 months ago).  Am feeling drained, & all to no avail as I don't seem to be doing anyone any service at all.

Namaste all

Greetings again, Kirolak,

You do a great service by sharing your non-physical experiences! People can learn they are not alone by reading here. Also if we can help get this worked out, others can see that process happening too --and share the fun in helping!

You can leave the physical through' the mind's eye' and that seems to be what you are doing. You do not need to drag along any of the 'subtle bodies.' Many of them like to leave through the top of your head--perhaps too close to the area that was hurt by the stroke.  So letting these experiences come as 'dreams' and gradually seems very smart! Soon you will notice you have more lucidity -- will power/intent -- and that will overcome the depression that poisoned this boat experience.

IMO, You started in a contemporary Noah's Ark scenario which was a set-up for you to help--neat! :D But your emotions started pulling you down down until you were at a very low level and unable to continue.

Now you have received all the signs that your spirit is involved in this despite any brain damge. Brain and spirit are independent of each other  :)  so no problem! You are helped by Helpers, you are operating beeyond physical limits -- Hurray!! :D :D You are ready!

You can ask to go back to the first boat and symbollically finish your job there. Use your mind's eye/imagination to lead the critters to a beautiful place where they can live in peace. Emanate PUL to show your good will but you don't have to heal each beastie individually--they are on the right boat to find perfection!

PUL to you from a fellow animal lover,
Bets

If you can send energy through the palms of your hands, you can up it to heart-felt PUL from the heart area/chakra, the same as generates the feelings that come from your hands. Getting it further into your torso gives your whole self its benefit too. That will help push away your doubts and revitalize you. You are a channel for PUL, not a machine that sends it out a small area, IMO. Opening your heart to PUL will make it easier to receive the channel.
Think of the feeling of PUL to be related to holding and hearing a cat pur. A warm relaxed cat.  :)
Kirolak, you are doing fine!

Thank you so much, Betson, for those kind encouraging words!  I have never got my heart chakra to emanate enrgy/love outwards,  despite trying - but my palms give off a real surge of it. (One can actually see it sometimes)
On a few occasions I have tried healing people with minor physical ailments, but unfortunately although the pain left them they were always reduced to tears, sometimes actually sobbing at the end of the "session", so I hope I'm not sending out anything negative!

Namsaste!

Kirolak, in addition to Bets' reply, when you set your intent for your sleep/nonphysical activities, you might include to work with a team of experienced, loving spirits, who would help you to be shielded from too heavy emotional energy, help you to use and refill your energy pool, and make you better understand what is happening during these activities.

Regarding your experiences with healing, that your patients sobbed or wept during/after the sessions is something what is not too uncommon. It can be a reaction to a sudden "clearing" of their personal history, the solution of a blockade and similar. Those people often cannot really put in words what has happened due to the suddenness and the non-word-approach of this kind of healing. I think this state is a window of opportunity, it can be used to gain deeper insight in oneself, and as an effect of this, becoming healthier.

Spooky

Thank you, Spooky2, I had not thought of working with a team as you suggest, but I shall definitely do so now.  Thanks also for clearing up the weeping question!

Namaste