Does anyone know of a method for working with social anxiety?

 

 Mentally: just stop caring so much what others think and remind self that its only important what you and your conscience (your connection--feedback to Source awareness) thinks about self and self activities.  Get involved in more social oriented activities, particularly in ones where self has common interests with others.  This creates a feeling of unity with others, with lessons the issue of social anxiety.

 Spiritually, the above, and maybe a practice of meditation, daily self detachment, and concentrating on the larger, more positive picture both of life in general, and ones own life.  

 When in doubt, lose strong sense of self in a service activity for others, such as volunteering at a shelter or what not.  Folks with overly self focussed, or self centered tendencies are rarely ever very happy or at peace for long...those that think more of others than of self usually have the opposite experience speaking on average.

Physically:  Eating and drinking more calming foods such as celery, chamomile and the like.  Laying off strong stimulative foods and substances such as very spice food, too much ginger, garlic, etc., caffeine, amounts of processed sugars .   Regular aerobic exercise, particularly long walks out in nature, or swimming in more natural settings (e.g. lake, river, ocean).

 Most importantly, go within and ask for help from the most helpful sources there are within and without self, and listen for answers.

Some good tips there already. I have social anxiety myself, and it changes from day to day, depending on how restless or depressed I am. I have gotten a lot of help from a psychologist. Often, but not always, it helps me if I think of life as a game, where I have nothing to lose, and everything to win, to overcome certain situations, or do things I'd normally be deathly afraid of. And sometimes I just throw myself towards the least pleasant path towards advancement. When I manage this, I almost get a high for a long while afterwards. Though, some days nothing can help me. But if you only have social anxiety, and not depression (I have both), it should be easier to remove the worst of your symptoms.

PS: My psychologist recommends meditation thirty minutes a day, with very slow breathing. He claims it helps remove unneccessary and wrong alarm signals between body and mind. Or some such.

If you are interested in taking a weekend course, I have heard this is a very good one:
http://www.landmarkeducation.com/landmark_forum.jsp

Hi JustineS,

Don't know if this helps but one thing I've learned about this issue (have a severe form of it) is that it's like you're a computer constantly pinging the server and the server is all that is around you.  For some reason, the way you define yourself is by looking for self definition in your environment.  People with this seem to create themselves by looking at what is around them.  They identify with everything and everyone and look for relevance.  If the environment has any sort of hostile tone (and the negative voice appears to be always present along with the positive), they judge themselves.  It's genetic (studies show) and may be some sort of automatic trigger in the energy body (imho).

It's really bizarre.

One thing I'm exploring for relief is EFT, emotional freedom technique (google search) and it's suppose to neutralize your energy system.  But I don't know if that's necessarily the best choice.  Do you become just an observer then?  Why would anyone want that result?

It does help to have a good sense of humor, that's what's said anyhow.

It also helps if you find a group of people who are like you and understand the situation, there are support groups out there....if you can get these other people to leave their house, lol.   :D

There's a duality that results from this disorder, imho.  The conflict between desire to preserve the self identity and the desire to totally give up the ego.

If you are dealing with this, JustineS, I really wish you well.  Be kind to yourself and know you're not alone.

Guided meditation is helpful, anything which focuses on building confidence. Exercise and other self-care, diet, some herbs, are helpful. Pacing yourself is helpful. Can you live your life with as much authenticity as possible, realizing that living honestly is an honorable path for you to take? Even down to the clothes you wear, be authentic, comfortable -- be yourself. In any situation in which you feel nervous, try centering yourself (as practiced in meditation), picturing your self as whole and balanced, protected and guided. If you take the time to listen to guidance in your everyday life (as practiced in meditation) it can help. In any case, it is not shameful to be a shy or quiet person, nor is it shameful to have 'nerves' which are 'overly' sensitive. It is not shameful in the least to have a very sensitive nature. I applaud it. Some of our greatest artists, some of our greatest contributers to society, have suffered in the same way.

I've suffered from social anxiety all of my life. But watching people helped me understand why some people act so hostile towards me. Knowing the reason makes me feel much better because I don't feel like a victim any more. (some people don't feel good about themselves and are trying to cover it up, others are just careless and not aware of the consequences of their actions, etc.)

I'd suggest exposing yourself more to the outside world. I studied archaeology, so I'd be sitting in an office, thinking about the past, now I ended up in a supermarket (cashier). I was surprised to find out how many people are nice to me.
For every jerk there's someone later in the line telling me not to worry cuz that jerk acts like that towards everyone. Now dealing with jerks has become some kind of "mental martial art", a challenge rather than torture.

It might also be helpful to take a walk in a neighbourhood where people are a little more relaxed. It always makes me feel good to hear some kind words, even if they're not directed at me.

hope I could help,
take care and good night,
Vagabound

Hi justinS and all     I suffer all the time from social anxiety,i never go shopping ,i never go anywhere apart from the centre ,the spiritualist church and occasionally my mom's,i am afraid of the outside world and the centre i go to is trying to help me,i have been at this centre for three years now and i still cannot venture out as i have had so much put down from others in the outside world that i now feel better in my safe little world being my home my centre and the spiritualist church,i have built a wall around me which is very slowly coming down as i am getting help ,also i am now doing an assertive class at the centre for the next eight weeks,so it may just help me.

Love and God bless   love juditha