Dear Justine
You have had a lot of beautifull replies to your concern....
We would love to hear from you about how this has helped/hindered your seeking.
Dialog on this site is so fruitfull..
If you please, let us know how you are feeling now about your fear of the unknown?
This forum is here to help us all to greater awareness.
Love Devayan.
ps. feedback is important so the circle can be complete.

Hello Davayan!
somehow I did not realize there were all these replies, I was email notified of the first one or two, but then for some reason I wasn't any more.
The answer is I am starting to do a little better; I had gone a month without sleep but I am sleeping again, despite frequent panic attacks.
Meditating has helped a lot as well as the messages from you all about love. It is very important to me to keep in mind an association between God and love to maintain faith, because love is the most real and beautiful thing I have ever experienced.

I truly appreciate all of your insight and compassion, you are all brave travelers who deal with so much uncertainty. Despite uncertainty about what I believe about the universe, I have a great faith in and compassion for humanity, which has been very much increased by my recent experiences with panic. If there is one thing I really believe in, it is other people such as yourself.
love and blessings to you

JustineS wrote on Nov 4^th, 2008 at 1:54am:

Hello Davayan! somehow I did not realize there were all these replies, I was email notified of the first one or two, but then for some reason I wasn't any more. The answer is I am starting to do a little better; I had gone a month without sleep but I am sleeping again, despite frequent panic attacks. Meditating has helped a lot as well as the messages from you all about love. It is very important to me to keep in mind an association between God and love to maintain faith, because love is the most real and beautiful thing I have ever experienced. I truly appreciate all of your insight and compassion, you are all brave travelers who deal with so much uncertainty. Despite uncertainty about what I believe about the universe, I have a great faith in and compassion for humanity, which has been very much increased by my recent experiences with panic. If there is one thing I really believe in, it is other people such as yourself. love and blessings to you

Justine your panic is ego /personality fear.If you can let yourself sink very deeply into that fear...let it take you deeply where it needs to go
It will take you to a beautifull truth of your essential nature.Remember all emotional pain and fear is merely not accepting what is.When you face and accept what is then all pain and fear will resolve into love and peace.,
LOve Devayan.
This is for me Truth of What Is.

What Devayan says has worked for me too Justine. When meditating I found that when I rested in the knot in my gut it (eventually after some weeks) delivered a rather remarkable insight that started me down the road to eliminating most of it.

I could explain what that was, but maybe it's best not to front end load your mind.

Working with some of the teaching on love from some of the sources and in the sort of context I mentioned to Sonia on the other thread moved things on some more too - it's in the end all about letting go and trusting instead that all is well. Forgiveness as ACIM says..

:) Good to hear you are making progress, for sure this sort of pain is self made and usually the result of our minds adopting what is objectively a selective view of our life situation. Ego likes us to do that, we dig ourselves deeper into the mire as we get more uptight....

wrote on Nov 4^th, 2008 at 3:16pm:

What Devayan says has worked for me too Justine. When meditating I found that when I rested in the knot in my gut it (eventually after some weeks) delivered a rather remarkable insight that started me down the road to eliminating most of it. I could explain what that was, but maybe it's best not to front end load your mind. Working with some of the teaching on love from some of the sources and in the sort of context I mentioned to Sonia on the other thread moved things on some more too - it's in the end all about letting go and trusting instead that all is well. Forgiveness as ACIM says.. :) Good to hear you are making progress, for sure this sort of pain is self made and usually the result of our minds adopting what is objectively a selective view of our life situation. Ego likes us to do that, we dig ourselves deeper into the mire as we get more uptight....

Also and thank you  Vajra for your response and acknowledgment...I feel it is very important not to demonise the "EGO"As I see it the ego is a necessary structure for us humans to function in space/time/Earth body.The ego does not have to be a problem.The problem comes with our conditioning from childhood and beyond.The cultural paradigm.Through deep inner introspection we come to know how we can step out from the old paradigm into the beautifull new world of PUL. BTW I don't always like abbreviations. there you go I did too..Pure Unconditional Love is so Life and Planetary changing it needs sometimes to be expressed fully.We don't live abbreviated lives do we?We live fully and deeply in every moment of our existence, whether we are conscious of it or not.If we are unconscious to some degree never mind because in the final leaving of this life All will be Remembered! No moment of our Earthly existence will be lost.'All will be contained in "The Record Book of Life"
Love to all of you beautifull seekers of Truth of What Is.
Devayan.