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Message started by KP138 on Sep 24th, 2007 at 3:07am

Title: In Shock
Post by KP138 on Sep 24th, 2007 at 3:07am

I've only posted here a couple times but I am in need of help/advice. My father committed suicide today. Will he be stuck in a hell like state because of this or perhaps stuck in a transitional state? I can't express how much of a shock this. My Dad was the most religious person I've ever known. Although I'm in a state of disbelief I'm trying to send unconditional love. Any help or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by blink on Sep 24th, 2007 at 7:37am
Yes, it is shocking when it really happens. It is devastating. I'm sorry for your loss and all that you are going through. This is a great place for you to find some answers, and there are lots of people here ready to help you find them.

When you say your father was religious, what do you mean? What kind of religion? What kind of person was he? What caused him to end his life?

I believe there are helpers who greet us on the other side, and that suicidal people find themselves in a transition area which is a healing one. There are those who believe that a person must somehow "redo" the lessons they missed here by ending their "contract" in this life, but I don't know anything about that.

I believe the love you are sending is your greatest gift to him. I feel that spirits hear and understand us but that it is not always easy for them to speak clearly to us. He is in a different world now. We will all continue to try to make the connections clearer and easier to understand, and in the meantime, love is the issue and the answer to all of our problems.

Inside of each of us, I believe, is a "survival" mechanism which assists us in "not surviving" if our essence, our core, believes we are better off out of this physical world. There is a place inside of us which embraces the place of "no things" and knows that our ego must let go in order to be free. What I mean is, there is a deep deep place of letting go, and some of those who commit suicide, I believe, have simply found that place, that place in their imagination and in reality, that place of "no things," which frees them from all that consumes their energy and holds them down. And so they leave, if they can.

What they sometimes forget is that the world of "things" is full of suprises and synchronicity and that this strange path in our lives itself is the precious lesson, one which is so rare and unique to us that no one else in the universe can trace its outline. It is in our hands. We often cannot see the forest for the trees.

Also, I think perhaps that some of those who commit suicide are not succumbing to irrational impulses, or despair. They are following their own programming in some unfathomable way that we cannot comprehend, as we do not live in their own psyches.  At least, we don't see that we do live there...we feel and believe in our own isolation here on this earth.

Of course we want to keep our loved ones in this world, and most of the time we are interested in staying here for a time. But we are all also adventurers who know we are born free, each with a spirit greater than we can comprehend.

Again, I am sorry for your loss, and for the abandonment you must feel, and for the unanswered questions you must have. But these questions will lead you to the place of peace we all seek. Our tears are real here on this earth, but so is our love, and there are no limits to how far and wide it can penetrate.

much love, blink :)


Title: Re: In Shock
Post by blink on Sep 24th, 2007 at 9:50am
I would like to add that the reason I responded so thoroughly here is because I was meditating last night before sleep and had a rather profound experience of despair during two meditations which normally soothe and restore me. The feelings were so strong that it was almost like a presence which was pulling tears from me. I felt thoughts coming through the meditations (both guided, both familiar, always restorative for me) which were very very strong, a warning from what seemed to be my own inner spirit that I would demolish everything I was if "spirit" did not prove itself to me, and immediately.

It was a jumping off a cliff feeling, but one in which psychically I could feel the rough edges of the rock beneath my fingers, the rough edges, the ragged edges of reality, and the darkness beyond was freedom, finality and the end of effort.

It was somewhat shocking to me to have those feelings intrude on my normally habitual meditations.

I have not been meditating recently as often as I used to, but this was odd. Perhaps my own feelings of transition and recent frustrations took me into that place and allowed me to feel that vibration. It is a very very low, intense, piercing vibration.

But it seems difficult to sustain. Therefore, we can help each other, that much is clear to me, with much less effort than we think. Those who teeter on the edge can fall back as well as forward.

Can fall back into the arms of loved ones, always. The edge is illusion.

love, blink :)

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by tgecks on Sep 24th, 2007 at 10:06am
I find your father encased in a cocoon of golden threads, which is like a insulator blanket to allow him to adjust to the transition and prevent him from being pulled in to various belief systems just now. He is in the Healing Center, which I find to be on every level from 23 up to and past 27, wrapped in this cocoon of Pure Unconditional Love and Forgiveness until he is ready to work on it. I was not permitted to communicate directly with him, but am told though it was sudden his guides were "there" waiting.

I hope this brings you some peace. Losing my parents was very difficult for me even with our rather strained relationship, and it took me some time before I could really deal with it all.

We all stand with  you in the Light, and send you our PUL at this time.

Love and Light,
Thomas

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by the_seeker on Sep 24th, 2007 at 12:12pm
he wouldn't necessarily be stuck, but pray for him anyway and think positive thoughts

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by dave_a_mbs on Sep 24th, 2007 at 1:56pm
Hi KP-
My condolences for your loss. It sounds like a shock, and a disruption of your reality.

From reports during regressions, the result when a person suicides is mostly based on the motivation and attitude at time of death. The biggest shock for many people is that God is infinitely loving, accepting and forgiving, which your Dad probably knew. So whatever his innermost purpose, he is being received with as much unconditional love as he is able or willing to accept.

After years of searching for a "hell" nobody has been able to find one.  It's a myth. The closest thing is the level of souls who are so prideful and egocentric that they refuse to acknowledge God, or any other way to exist - but the hell aspect is their own creation.

Spirits seem to hear and benefit from our prayers, so I suggest that you pray for your Dad, so that whatever his purpose was, he now can be at peace with it. You might also consider forgiving him for the grief he is causing you and your family.

dave

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by DocM on Sep 24th, 2007 at 3:06pm
Hi KP,

I am sorry for your loss as well.  I do think that speaking to him either out loud or in your mind may be hepful.  I also think it is important to let him know that you love him and want him to overcome this.  If a person who commits suicide is "held back," it may be because of the feelings associated with all the negative karma and emotions of his/her family.  Let him know that he should find happiness and peace.  Let him know you will forgive him and come to terms with things, somehow.

And please don't believe that any post mortem existence is without hope.  We can change our minds on earth, and "as above, so below," (i.e. - your dad will have choices).  Let him and you both be open to him choosing love and letting go of any fear.


Matthew

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by KP138 on Sep 24th, 2007 at 3:17pm

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement. I still can't believe this happened. My dad was a Christian, and tried to lead his entire life based on faith and the Bible.


Title: Re: In Shock
Post by Jkelly on Sep 24th, 2007 at 11:19pm
KP- my heart goes out to you. I myself am dealing with the sudden death of my younger Brother just a month ago by his own actions. I truly understand your confusion and disbelief.

You and your loved ones will want to naturally search for the answer as to why this would happen. We did and it kept my Brother from crossing over for a time because we were holding him.

The best thing you can do for your Father is to pray for him. Talk with him and tell him how much you love him and try to Forgive him. This will allow your Father to begin having peace.

This helped my Brother to cross and begin healing to have peace.

Know that your love for him will always allow him to be with you.

I truly wish I could offer you more but there are no words that I can say that will heal your pain.

I will pray for you and your family.


Title: Re: In Shock
Post by vajra on Sep 25th, 2007 at 8:29am
Hi KP. Hang in there. PUL

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by dave_a_mbs on Sep 26th, 2007 at 6:11pm
Hi KP-
There are lots of reasons that a good Christian might decide to commit suicide.

You don't know what the circumstances were, not from your Dad's viewpoint, anyhow.  So you might be judging him on the wrong basis.

As one example, a person diagnosed with an incurable disease, one that would require endless hours of care and bankruptcy for the family, might decide to end life immediately. In that case, the purpose is an honorable one and not irreligious. And there are other personal reasons in addition to simply wanting to escape the world.

Your tone suggests that you feel that your Dad violated some kind of moral or religious dictum by jumping off the world in midstream. That's possible. But if he truly was a spiritually competent person, it's more likely that he had reasons, and he didn't wish to inflict some kind of problem upon you.

Usually, a suicide is a shock, then we get sad at the loss and angry at the imposition, and finally we sort of accept it and go on with life. Meanwhile, you can meditate and offer to listen to your Dad if he has anything to tell you. Chances are he'll make himself known and perhaps will explain what motivated him.

dave

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by LaffingRain on Sep 30th, 2007 at 3:37am
Keep sending PUL, they can use the PUL to expand their awareness and move on. the grief keeps them tied to the Earth. have conversations with him in your head, he hears your thoughts. trust me, I've been there.
Keep telling him your thoughts and send PUL.

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by orlando123 on Oct 2nd, 2007 at 3:43pm
I'm sorry for  what has happened KP138, you must feel very shocked and upset. I have nothing much to offer other than that I also do not believe in mortal sin or eternal damnation etc and think that there are always second chances and hope. I can't advise on why he did what he did, but I guess being a devout Christian is not necessarily any guarantee of escaping painful situations in life which can lead to people doing this. He might also have had spiritual doubts that he didn't share, for that matter, and not been so confident about his faith as he seemed. I wouldn;t blame him as I personally find aspects of Christainity hard to understand/accept and if I am any sort of Christian, it is a very liberal kind.

Love

Orlando

Title: Re: In Shock
Post by phoenixrisinges on Oct 14th, 2007 at 12:34pm
Dear KP138,
my Son passed to Spirit on the 6th by his own hand.
I must declare I am a Spiritualist and anti religion. I suggest it is used as a method of control and order and not as a means of unconditional Love based Faith.
I state that up front so you are aware of where I am coming from.
I know, which may for some be a strong word to use, my Son is safe and being well looked after by my parents and others who have passed to Spirit earlier over the years.
Contact has been made by my Son to me via three separate people. None really new my Son and facts were stated which made be 100% aware it was my Son.
Knowing he is safe and has been released from the burdens that he carried has helped.
Do not get me wrong I miss him. I cannot hold, hug and cuddle him. Yes we openly affectionate in public. Yes, we was a "monster" at times. Yes he did teach me "unconditional love", so his life was from a waste of time whilst he was here.
May You God Be With You.

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