How would I go about finding a spiritual woman?I have a woman now,but she thinks Im nuts.She and I are so far apart.I cant do my spiritual stuff,because shes right on my back.I wish I could find somebody who understands me.George

You can draw people to you with just your thoughts.  You project what is in your heart and if your intention is to meet a particular person or kind of person, everything to make that happen will eventually fall into place when the time is right.  

George,

I'd say the easiest way would be to ask your higher self if the time is right. For it's up-to your higher self to organize a meeting. These things are so hard to work through, as the soul you maybe waiting for could still be locked into a lesson they need to complete. And there by are not ready to meet you. In fact when it comes to these things I'd just wait for it to happen, myself. The more you push the universe the longer the wait seems to be. But I know your frustration at wanting to join with that someone you really connect with.

I think we all have that desirer deep within, I'm not sure if the Buddhist are right, but they say when we incarnated at the first run, we where split into two cells one male one female and its only when each have reached the completion of there lessons here on earth that they shell be reunited. I believe thats what drives us to look for that perfect someone, who will understand us completely . Obviously there aren't many who have been even close to being with there other half but that doesn't stop us looking.

George,

I do think that its a matter of stating intent with certainty.  That you will meet a loving spiritually oriented woman.  See it is as done.  Give thanks as if it has happened.  Let the thought sink down to enter in as a true belief.  Say it to yourself repeatedly.  This is how we impress intent on the subconscious and how probabilities are affected in the real world to manifest our thought.  It is a real phenomenon that is the basis of much magic in days gone by.


Matthew

george stone wrote on Oct 24^th, 2006 at 11:53pm:

How would I go about finding a spiritual woman?I have a woman now,but she thinks Im nuts.She and I are so far apart.I cant do my spiritual stuff,because shes right on my back.I wish I could find somebody who understands me.George

well, what spiritual stuff are you talking about then George? your story feels like a big contradiction to me......if you are as spiritual as you say, you would understand she isnt on your wave length and why.......if the two of you are so far apart.....why continue the relationship? why do you need a relationship at all? what ever is destined to come, will come......

Hi George,

Sharing spirituality with a significant other in our lives can be tricky sometimes. But you're not nuts, and you know it. I say, just do what you do, believe what you believe.

Keep doing what works for you, what brings you into communion with a higher power and what brings more love and knowledge into your life. A new couple needs to learn mutual respect for each others' beliefs. If this mutual respect is not nurtured the relationship will dissolve, but if the love is strong enough between you it will be possible to simply agree to have differences. Finding the places in your spiritual thinking where you actually converge can be a good way to have a meeting of your hearts. Sometimes people think they disagree when they really don't, if the two people can look deeper into their relationship. Sometimes these kinds of disagreements can be a cover for some other area of emotional imbalance, and what is needed is a way to establish emotional boundaries.

But, you know, you don't have to look far to find a spiritual woman. All of us are spiritual beings searching for understanding, and fearing what we don't understand. So, even if you found someone else there could be some other area of your lives together which would need attention in a loving way.

all the best to you George, blink

I don't have a lady friend at the time, but I get what George is saying. A lot of women would think I'm nuts, when in fact I'm saner than I have ever been.

My feeling is that if a woman is going to accept me, she would have to accept my spirituality. I don't see how I could hide the most important part of my life from her.

george stone wrote on Oct 24^th, 2006 at 11:53pm:

How would I go about finding a spiritual woman?I have a woman now,but she thinks Im nuts.She and I are so far apart.I cant do my spiritual stuff,because shes right on my back.I wish I could find somebody who understands me.George

this is a little strange George but I was talking to u about this very subject matter just yesterday then I come here, and there you are discussing this very subject. take heart then, you are connected to this forum, your spiritual home and your inner life has now gone public! :D  I guess I'm trying to say I feel for your problem. it seems a lot of us here have the same problem. just exchange the person's name to another person or family member who cannot understand or support us. its actually a universal problem wouldn't you say?
I'd say you can keep your relationship only if you develop patience with her lack of understanding. I'd say you can remain true to yourself at the same time by telling her you will be needing some space to do your spiritual things. maybe she will want to practice what you practice rather than lose you entirely? it would be nice if you two can learn to communicate your needs to each other. but then again, its a universal problem and would be pleased to know of anyone's success in any kind of relationship whatsoever! ;)

George, there is no ideal relationship on Earth. not really. I have been told by guides in the most old fashioned way, we must bring heaven to Earth, each individual by being true to yourself.

I support you George, you are a most delightful expresser here. love, alysia

Hi George-
The question, at least as I see it, is whether you desire a friend or a mate.

Friends are just like us, so that we all do the same things together. Friends are easy, agreeable, always sharing the same feelings as us, and dependebly stable. With our friends we are a "Me", and secure in it. But to try to build a life together with a friend is rather like trying to keep on being yourself as you change. Eventually there is no more glue to hold the friendship together when things get tough, and especially when we grow. Then we outgrow the old friends and slowly reevolve through a new group. People who try to marry their best friends often discover that they have made a mistake, just as if they married their own mirror image, or a photograph of themselves.

Spouses are complementary, and often lack some of the properties that we seek in our casual friends. In compensation, spouses bring complementarity. Where we lack, our spouses fill in, and we fill in where they have lacks. Thus, between self and spouse there is a whole being of higher order, an "Us", held together by trust, by sharing the burdens of life, and by love. There is no stability, because the life that is built leads to a continuation and elaboration of the complementarity. The essence is growth, development and evolution.

Friends bring us sugar, our spouses bring us spice.

When you look for a woman who is spiritual, or who loves other activities the way that you do, what you are seeking is fulfillment of an image. If there is someone who is otherwise loving, caring and truly interested, and she makes up for the lacks of your experiences and drives with hers, just as you make up for her deficiencies with your own strengths, then you have found a spiritual woman who is, at least at the moment, fully appropriate. The issue is what you mean by "spiritual" in that context. What could be more spiritual than to love with all your strength?

To hang out with friends is always safe. Non-eventful, but safe. To enter into a permanent (or semi-permanent) arrangement with an appropriate spouse type is going to be a roller coaster, but thrilling. Because of this, my advice to my grandchildren is to avoid marriage until they have decided that they want to ride the roller coaster, and that this specific person is the one with whom to ride it. Loving means allowing yourself to leave your comfort zone to face life in the raw.

I suspect that if you were to agree to set a little time apart in which to meditate - obviously not according to present habits in which your other half wants to go shopping, make love, wash the dishes, clean the house, paint the bedroom or whatever - then she would understand. This is the complementarity again, where you do the spiritual thing which makes up for her lack of skills in those areas. She, at the same time, probably has other habits that you totally lack interest in pursuing, in which she would invest her time.

As an example, my personal resolution of this is that I discovered that I have married a witch - meaning a pantheist who finds God in nature, in the trees and winds, and in communion with the animals. I do science and find energies and forces there, and I find God in abstract logical stuff and exotic experiences, or in meditation. I do psychotherapy, she does geriatric nursing (appropriate to both of us!) so between us we cover the field. She finds my ideas a bit bizarre, but is interested, and vice versa. She reads herself to sleep at night, so that's my time to meditate and study. The rest of the time, we live like all people do, trusting that the other actually understands, even if differently.

Were you to come to my clinical office I'd advise you to beware of falling in love with an imaginary woman's image projected onto whomever you are seeing, or even more dangerously, projected onto a friend. - I've tried it - it doesn't work.

That said, I wish you the best in discovering a suitable soul mate.
PUL
dave

Hi George my husband does not beleive at all about anything spiritual,so i just ignore him,as i think just because he does not beleive,i do as i think hes sad because he does not know what hes missing,but then thats his choice i suppose.Each to our own. ::)

Love and God bless you George   Juditha

I understand George's point in posting this.  If we are dating or married, and we start to experience and believe in the soul, the afterlife and then all the related issues such as karma, duality, love/PUL - if our mate does not understand this, they may be "stuck" in a dualistic mode of thinking, full of life's ups and downs, without getting the "bigger" picture.

Imagine the wife slamming the door on her husband because of an argument because of a fight or misunderstanding.  Would this have happened to a spiritually enlightened person?  Maybe, but I've found that the more "in tune" you are with spirituality and the golden rule, the quicker you want to set things right if they go wrong.  Emotions, especially negative emotions of fear, hatred, anger, depression are often a spiritual sign that we have taken a wrong turn.  Yet, in the Western world, they are not often interpreted that way.  Thus, people in the USA are encouraged to "express their anger," or divorce or separate to do what is right for themselves.  Often, I disagree with this conventional advice.

The idea of a soulmate here on earth who is aware of spirit/God/heaven, and consciousness sounds intoxicating to me.  If one has a husband or wife who doesn't understand this, then we work with them, and realize all we share in terms of love, children, family, and try to get them to see our understanding bit by bit.  

I like Dave's response.  I do understand why George posted the initial question, however, as a spiritually aware person wants to go through life with a mate of a like mind and not be dragged into the duality of the world, and rocky rollercoaster (as Dave nicely calls it) ride of blind individuality.

M

I see you George and myself too this way, and everybody really, as there's this person living in C1. then theres this other person living There. the I/there. I see George as a simple man who comes here and becomes the angel we entertain unaware. He has led us more than one occasion back to the basics of Earth living and setting our priorities what's important. he may not be aware he leads us this way. but his I/there knows what he's doing. anyway, I have had my thoughts led by you George on more than one occassion, we can call it a rote from spririt too. whatever, I wish to thank you for being here as I do like to receive rotes :)  and much enjoy Doc and Dave's responses and think we have a fine thread about what's important. basically, relationship is important. you can't take your couch with you when you go, but I've heard from a good source we can take our relationships with us! ;)

happy Wednesday everybody. alysia

Here's another way to look at things.

Believing in spiritual things and having spiritual experiences doesn't mean that you have to act crazy.

As long as you act in a balanced and loving way, a person "should" be able to see that you're okay.

I find that I'm able to have perfectly normal conversations with people who aren't consciously spiritual.

Recoverer said: I find that I'm able to have perfectly normal conversations with people who aren't consciously spiritual.
___

same here. but on the other hand it's different with an intimate relationship where u feel someone is always on your back, like George said. in such a circumstance, u cant change the other person to stop pulling on your energy, so you constantly have to examine how to change your own beliefs. thats work, unfortunately. :P  the best way to harmonize a relationship is to change your beliefs, not theirs, or maybe its better to say we practice forgiveness 24/7.

George, I know you were close to your wife and missed her terribly when she transitioned. Ask her to send you a spiritual woman who will help fulfill your needs for a spiritual partner.  Or ask your guidance.

Love, Mairlyn ;-)

Laffingrain, I swear you lie in wait for those 1:11 and 11:11 posting times... ;)

I found a man who was spiritual, didn't freak when he found out he'd married a witch (maybe because my first "weird" act was to "witch" a deer for him in a place he'd never been able to
get one)...and the turkey very inconsiderately dropped dead on me.  He and I have things to talk about when I get where he is...

Oh, and spellcheck wants to replace "laffingrain" with "fingering".  I don't even want to try to understand that one.  This is why I always pay attention to what it says instead of just hitting "replace".  I've gotten some emails from people who obviously didn't do that...funny but probably very embarassing if they ever actually read what they sent.

Well I married my best friend, and he always knew I was into spiritual stuff.  He wasn't.  Unfortunately, years later we weren't best friends anymore but still friends.  It's hard.  He can't stand my spiritual beliefs and wants nothing to do with it and has called me crazy more than once.  He tried forcing me to change but he knows he can't change me.  We decided to not discuss certain topics as the only way to get along.  I have found that the hardest part was learning to not be afraid to be myself, and learning to like and love myself.  Those were things I didn't realize I had been neglecting.  

When I read the below post the blue bar at the top of the thread said "read 111 times." Also, the max message (marked by a green circle when you write a post) said 20111 characters when I started to write this post.



Cricket wrote on Oct 25^th, 2006 at 4:52pm:

Laffingrain, I swear you lie in wait for those 1:11 and 11:11 posting times... ;) I found a man who was spiritual, didn't freak when he found out he'd married a witch (maybe because my first "weird" act was to "witch" a deer for him in a place he'd never been able to get one)...and the turkey very inconsiderately dropped dead on me.  He and I have things to talk about when I get where he is... Oh, and spellcheck wants to replace "laffingrain" with "fingering".  I don't even want to try to understand that one.  This is why I always pay attention to what it says instead of just hitting "replace".  I've gotten some emails from people who obviously didn't do that...funny but probably very embarassing if they ever actually read what they sent.

Amongst all the kindly thoughts I feel like I was lecturing you, George. Please forgive my arrogance - I just hate to see others make the same mistakes I made - 4 times yet!

The 5th time worked. But it took 12 years before she'd allow me to even SAY the "M word".

dave

For what it is worth George..

My husband hasn't quite got the same beliefs as I, but he lets me get on with it and he is happy because I am happy with my Spiritual World and he accept's it...Maybe your Girl should give you some Space to do your research..Surely she can do that for you?

Your not doing any harm atall..you are just seeking what is in your heart and she should support you, for god's sake, it's not as if you are running off every night going to the bars and getting Drunk and high on Drugs ,.you are doing what makes you happy. Get her told and tell her not to make a big stupid deal of it!

Don't Let her Spoil the Spiritual side of you otherwise if it makes you miserable then give her a kick up the ass...


Be Strong mate and stand your ground   xxxx

lol  :) Cricket, its not true whatever yer thinking :D Goldiflocks, my goodness, I see you would never have George's predictament! and my guy dropped out of the race too, but not because of what I did for him, maybe because of what I didn't do! :-X theres no bad feelings there though. thats funny Rec. about all the ones...good heavens, what could it mean?

George, I swear we will keep on track with the subject if you would just come back and talk. love, alysia

Hi alysia

:)  No-one could EVER come in between my Faith in the afterlife... Even my kid's Ba-hoo it but they know that I will continue with my Belief/ knowing..It's what rock's my World!  :) :)

Val xxxxxx

Whhhooooar, This will be my 100th Post
 
;D ;D ;D

When I had enough of seeking a woman for partnership I had the idea or got the message, "She will find you". That makes me living more easily. Although that was I think two years ago and I'm still waiting...

Spooky

Thanks my friends for all your suport.She is a good woman,around the house,but she keeps telling me to come back to normal.She does not believe that ive had all my spiritual experience.I guess I will have to tell her shes not welcome in my house anymore.I have done alot for her sense I met her.ive paid of her visa,that was over 10.000 dollors,and otherBills.I like helping people who are not so well off as I am.But you know people take advantage of you.But I am afried I will have to let her go.Its cost me 40.000 dollors so far.I think that is enought.Thanks a lot.Its good to have all of you to talk to.You are all the best people ive ever talked to.God bless you.George

if I was in the market I'd marry every last one of you :)  Spooky reminds me of Gibran, he said "if love finds you worthy it will find you."  but confidentially I enjoy having the bed all to myself and all my time is mine alone and u can concentrate on your work without having to make sure your beloved is happy and contented. I mean, face it, relationships are work, I'd rather do as Gibran says. if I'm worthy, that's great, if I'm not, thats great too because happiness is just a choice.
but everyone likes to feel needed and wanted and a special someone can be even a reason to stick around on this earth so relationships are soooooooo important. I'd say if anyone has one, even a not so good one, you got something to hold onto! treasure the moments, too soon we leave this place perhaps not to meet again. love, alysia

modify after reading George.. :o  George...giving money to a loved one is very generous of you but I've done the same thing to give money to loved ones, not quite as much as you, and its never been appreciated because they did not earn the money themselves, it was actually hurting their spiritual growth for me to do that. I almost ruined my relationship with my daughter by consolidating her bills into one card for her instead of making her do it. this action turned me into her watchdog as I had it in my name then had to go after her for the monthly payment. all because of a few tears that got to me.
the best thing u can do for those poorer than you is teach them to stand on their own two feet and jump into life with your chin sticking out. u betcha!!!
get someone wants your love George, not your money. love, alysia

I'm having a great time with this board,:).I've really enjoyed reading everyones responses to this! So many interesting, and compassionate, and intelligent people all in once place is a delightful rarity.

It's been helping me so much writing down all these things that I am reflecting about now that my partner passed recently...and this thread brought a wide grin to my face, and I was flooded with memories, of just this kind of thing.Before meeting Sandy, I was praying for such a connection,here and there, and when I did meet him....I would have bet money that we would not last over a month.I was arrogant enough  I guess,to even say,"Nah,he just isn't my type, we don't have too much in common...etc" My little brother was living with myself and my kids at the time I met Sandy,and happened to be there the day I  met Sandy...and as we drove away, my brother, who knows his sister well, looked over at me and said, "Oh oh, Tanja, you're in trouble"...and I asked what on earth did he mean? He told me that he could feel the connection, and that he knew I would be with this man in short order.It took me by surprise,b/c my brother isn't one to make comments like that, and I knew from the begining,there were plenty of warning signs that we are completely opposite in many key ways....warning signs or not,there was a palpable and compelling attraction that was there from the instant we met.

I too,married my best friend who I grew up with, and I thought I was being very clever...thinking we are so much alike,that it would be perfect...but it did not turn out that way..and we were blessed with the two boys I have today..and then we split for good.Sandy, however, we had such a passionate relationship b/c of our differences, not that we have nothing in common,but some key differences.....but we ended up helping each other balencing the differences to a happy medium, that we both started getting benefits from and we also grew. One small example I can think of,is I was brought up in "little Finalnd",lol, my parents both came from that country,my dad in his mid 20's, my mom as a teen..and as Finns can be, I grew up in a very stoic household, we were careful not to let emotions carry us away,that was considered weak...and I never heard "I love you" from them, but I honestly knew it, with my dad, esp., that he loved me b/c he showed me...although with my kids I made a conscious effort to say I love you everyday...b/c I think you can't hear it enough....but growing up I hear that it cheapens the word and meaning of love, if it is said too easily or often.......Sandy, on the other hand, growing up in a large family,Italian and some Irish...he was someone who would say what came to mind or upset him as soon as it was there,and even if he felt intense anger or hurt...he was ableto let it go very quickly as soon as he expressed it, and let the energy run through him, instead of trying to resist it or hang on to it. Me, on the other hand, tend to be one who can hold onto things too long.It's not surprising I have anxiety issues and bouts of depression(I've heard somewhere depression is mostly frozen anger, and that made me think). But then sometimes either extreme has it's problems,so we were able to teach and help each other by taking a little of something from each other,and as we did, we became less black and white with our own thnking and or ways of coping with things.

I know for myself, I was able to practice plenty of empathy, b/c I think I was challenged to, and that helped me get to understand him and myself better...I was challenged then to modify my own behavoir a bit. It made me see that very different perspectives can both have validity and work,even if they were different.Never a dull moment sometimes..lol.

As we became more and more open to each others opinions and beliefs, the more we encouraged each other to share,and if I would have been asked in advance, before really knowing him, I would have said that it couldn't work out..and I didn't  at first consider him too spiritual, and that's what I wanted too, was to find someone spiritual in similar ways as myself.I found that Sandy was/is incredibly spiritual after all...but I didn't expect to meet anyone when I met him,nor was I even activly looking....so I think there is a certain timing, or when two souls are ready to begin a journey together like that.Although I so know that feeling of  wishing things would hurry up already.....and how I felt when I was really wanting to find that special someone!

I think a very cool thing that happens alot to me, anyway, with this situation, and others..is I think to myself that I know what it is I want, and would dream of what I felt would be an ideal and happy outcome or find...and then almost always,no matter how great I imagined what it would be like....I was amazed to find that what I actually got when the timing was right, was far better, and even my best dreams were selling myself short to what really was/is given to me... 8-)

Dave,

Your main post on this thread is one of the wisest things I've read lately and I thank you for your insight.

Love,
Rob

Alysia:

Can you please clarify this statement a little bit further for me  :-*

"too soon we leave this place perhaps not to meet again."

I thought we would eventually meet all of the characters from this life at one point or another. How can we know who we meet  again and who do we lose contact with for eternity?

I very much related to what Dave said. Don't you find that  when you meet people who are too similiar to you  that there is often a lack of physical chemistry? For me, men go into two categories; either those I am attracted to or they end up in the friends category. I usually find those that stimulate me and push my buttons to ultimatley be the most attractive. Maybe I am just a drama queen but I find if the boat doesnt rock at least occasionally......it could lead to boredom, the  opposite of passion!

I also relate to karmickiss. My soulmate , Pat, was very different then me in many ways. Our differences were very complimentary. I am a slob, he was a neat freak who loved to clean up after me. He was loud and outgoing, he never edited what he was about to say ( I adored that quality in him), often times lacking tact  and sometimes offending others. I was an obsessive people pleaser who would often painfully scrutinize things i'd said or done ( Pat has since taught me to let that quality go!). We each balanced each other out and it worked and there was oodles of passion!

My best friend is now persuing me and although he adores me and it would be safe on many levels......I need the spice! I want to wait to find something similiar to what i'd had before with Pat, even if it means being single for a long time.

Try what Marilyn has suggested, ask your partner who has transitioned to help guide you to your next partner. I was told Pat would not only help me find my next partner, but he'd allready chosen him (cause he knows what i'd like  ::) ) and that he'd send him my way when I was ready. Your wife would know best!

BD

It's all about balance amigo.

Spilting from your wife just because she does'nt believe in your spiritual experiences, strikes me as extreme..and very odd.

Would you believe her if she said she was abducted by aliens? and spent all her time saying they were visiting her every night?

i doubt you would.

You must have married the woman for a reason... and since i doubt it was her spiritual curiosity, then remember why you married her, and if you truely love her... none of this spiritual mumbo jumbo matters.

Hi Spitfire V2 I agree that if you truly love someone,it does not matter if they dont beleive.Welcome to the board.
Love and God bless you Juditha

WELCOME TO THE BOARD SPITFIRE V2 LOVE DEANNA

It's good to see you back Craig. Hope you're feeling better.

Love, Mairlyn ;-)

Ah Hah!  Spitfire sighting!   :)

I got the impression his wife didn't just not believe but actively mocked/objected?  *That* might be an issue for me...just agreeing to disagree would be fine for me, but actively dissing my beliefs...that might be a deal breaker.

BD said: Can you please clarify this statement a little bit further for me
"too soon we leave this place perhaps not to meet again."
____
I had a feeling I needed to clarify :) I say that or think that a lot because I could drop dead anytime is my feeling. I therefore want to try to enjoy each moment I have like its my last. I'm sure we will meet folks on the other side with whom had some meaningfulness to us, like a bond or learning situation or deep friendships. yet I also get this feeling here is where I celebrate you folks, but when I get on the other side I may not have what I enjoy here. does that make any sense? I'm thinking say you were married for 30 years. you are used to spending 8 hours every nite living with that person intimately. this really happens. so you both die and one wants to go on their merry way and the other doesn't. so free will reigns on both sides, but instead of the 8 hours of time with your loved one, you end up on the other side with making an appointment with them. :-? this is not my personal story. just a friend of mine told me about it. ultimately what happens I believe is the right thing, I just wanna make sure I never put all my eggs in one basket and get into a dependancy situation and be calling it love. but I really respect people who make it work and are happy.
Craig, its good to see you again. :) George lost his wife not too long ago. this other lady has recently come into his life; it looks like a learning situation and he appears to be handling it well now.
KarmicKiss, as usual your expression makes me happy, that you had something fine and still do. I feel that way about my husband passed on too, that, maybe I didn't have 30 years, but hey! I had some time with him, that makes me lucky. :)

Hi I beleive that trust in a relationship is inportant,if the trust stops ,the relationship is over.If you cant trust the one you are with,then its better to say bye,and move on.

Vickie thats what i am learning to do at the moment,is love myself and i am trying to get myself to beleive i am worth something,i am getting there slowly,but i will make it in the end.

Love and God bless you all Juditha

Juditha u just said something I think is so important for a lot of us if not most of us. :) u said u wanted to love yourself and get to believe you are worth something and u also said u want to believe you are worth something and are getting there slowly and will make it in the end:)  this has been my journey also. its my opinion what u r doing here and what u do when you help people is taking you to a sense of your own value and will cause you to love yourself more and more.
and you r starting to grow on me :D  I think you're on the right track to begin trusting yourself.
you too George ;) you are trusting yourself too.
love, alysia