Hi, I'm a new user, a 38 year old transgendered woman in the process of transitioning from my male birth gender to female.

Is this experience something my higher self thought would be a kick or something?    

Welcome Aeyna to the forum. I don't feel that this is something your higher self thought would be a kick or something. I feel this may be something that you chose in your pre-birth plan for learning many, many huge lessons. You go girl.

With Love,
Mairlyn ;-)

Thanks for the warm welcome and nice sentiments, Marilyn.   This life has definitely been an experience so far :)!

wrote on Jul 20^th, 2006 at 9:50pm:

You go girl.

Awesome  :-?

Aeyna,

correct me if I'm wrong, but does that mean that you are a male who want to have a female body? In case this is indeed so:

!!! D-O-N-T  D-O  T-H-A-T !!!

Here's why:

more people feel like you do: some men feel like they are a woman and want a female body. Some women feel like a man and want a male body. BUT WHY? You, as a personality, never dies. We all have lived already more than a 1000 times on earth. We will have to accept both bodies. So, you have probably lived a lot of lives as a female and now you feel like a woman. BUT: now you are back on earth... in a male body! It's now up to you to learn to accept this kind of body, DON'T get rid of it! This is utterly wrong. In a next life, you will be pushed back in a male body, because you have to learn "to be male". You can't escape from it, never.

In know, if you hear this for the first time, this sounds crazy. But there's a lot more to say about this. I'm not going to do this if you're not interested in it or if you laugh at it. But, at least, think about it: what are homosexuals, what are bisexuals, ...?

I think if it makes... um... her?.. happy... she?... should do what ever she wants.  If it's destiny to stay, how she is, there will be intervention, no?

Just my opinion.

welcome Aeyna. I had a friend whose husband was going to do the gender change and grew breasts but then met a woman and decided to stay as a man, so thats why they do a lot of counseling before doing it, because if you decided later you wanted to be a man again, its too late.

it could be true you wanted a challenge from your soul level. I have met many feminine men and some very masculine energy men. we start to see the body is the thing that carries the dna and gender. on the inside, we are both male and female energy trying to reach a balance between those energies.

I wish you happiness. I can tell its been hard for you. love, alysia

Rataplan wrote on Jul 21^st, 2006 at 5:16am:

Aeyna, correct me if I'm wrong, but does that mean that you are a male who want to have a female body? In case this is indeed so:

That's right.  Since age 3-4 I've known something wasn't right.  Kept hoping I'd wake up a girl.


Quote:

more people feel like you do: some men feel like they are a woman and want a female body. Some women feel like a man and want a male body. BUT WHY? You, as a personality, never dies. We all have lived already more than a 1000 times on earth. We will have to accept both bodies. So, you have probably lived a lot of lives as a female and now you feel like a woman. BUT: now you are back on earth... in a male body! It's now up to you to learn to accept this kind of body, DON'T get rid of it! This is utterly wrong. In a next life, you will be pushed back in a male body, because you have to learn "to be male". You can't escape from it, never.

I have heard this argument and I do not dismiss it out of hand.   In everyday life it can be ok, but the problem comes when I cannot express myself sexually except as a woman.   The other stuff is easy to fake, right.  We all have "male" and "female" interests.   But when the rubber meets the road, I cannot pretend to enjoy the male role sexually.   Believe me, the external pressures to remain male are strong, but even stronger is that internal reality.

A reading I had in the past said that in my last life I was a woman who was rather mistreated by males, hence an aversion to accept being the same gender as the one that tormented me.  

wrote on Jul 21^st, 2006 at 5:25am:

I think if it makes... um... her?.. happy... she?... should do what ever she wants.  If it's destiny to stay, how she is, there will be intervention, no? Just my opinion.

Yes, and I'm not blinding rushing into anything.  I'm very attentive to signs.    Female pronouns appreciated, thank you.

Aeyna wrote on Jul 21^st, 2006 at 2:39pm:

wrote on Jul 21st, 2006 at 5:25am: I think if it makes... um... her?.. happy... she?... should do what ever she wants.  If it's destiny to stay, how she is, there will be intervention, no? Just my opinion. Yes, and I'm not blinding rushing into anything.  I'm very attentive to signs.    Female pronouns appreciated, thank you.

Great, I think spiritual growth is spiritual growth regardless of what's going on in your pants   ;)

Aeyna,

It's my understanding based on past-life and between lives regressions done by professionals (psychiatrists, psychologists, and so on) that often someone who has been predominately one gender for most of their incarnations will have difficulty adapting to the other sex. On the other hand, some incarnate as homosexuals or transgendered individuals to experience what it's like to be someone who is abused by peers, family, and society at large (without reference to previous incarnations) for the purpose of soul development. Some of the lessons we choose are hard.

If I were you, and I'm not presuming to tell you what to do, I would do a past life regression to see why you feel the way you do. Otherwise, I would learn to communicate with your guides to make sure that changing genders is part of what you came here to do.

Regardless, I support you in whatever you decide to do.

Love,
Rob

Greetings, Aeyna,
That's a lovely name you've chosen.  :)
May life's lessons be gentler for you as a member of the gentler gender.  Much happiness to you in your future life!
bets

Ayena wrote: A reading I had in the past said that in my last life I was a woman who was rather mistreated by males, hence an aversion to accept being the same gender as the one that tormented me.
___

was wondering if you think this is true for you Ayena? it sounds logical. you may be able to go within and ask yourself this question and see if you get any images or intuitions pop up for you.

or you might look for a mate accepts you the way you are and let you be yourself sexually. real love doesn't make you express manliness, whatever the heck that is, if it's not who you are. maybe theres a woman out there wants to be the active polarity and let you be passive polarity. just a thought. I mean I'm no sex expert, but when it comes heart to heart talk, you know none of this role playing matters much. you are fascinating person btw.

hugs, alysia

Aeyna:

Whatever you do I wish you the best. :D

Hi Aeyna,
Welcome, and I hope you find the answeres you are looking for in life.
We are all searching for something and all take different paths in our quest of spiritualuity.

Hello Aeyna,
My name is Ralph but I don't mind thinking of myself as Ralphina. I'm a natural born male, but I think I have chimerism which is female genes inside of me. There was a show about that on Lifetime Health called "I Am My Own Twin". Anyway, I also consider myself transgendered and always have that longing for becoming a female. I live with that desire but I cannot get a sex change as I am happily married to a wonderful woman. She accepts me as I am and (God Bless her), deals with public opinion since she doesn't want people to think that she is a lesbian. I try to balance out my appearance so that society accepts me as an effiminate looking male husband. So far, so good. I have a good relationship with my family, and also the grandchildren of my wife's daughter through her first marriage. Everyone accepts me for who I am, so I have no need to go through any transformation to being a complete female. My female brain can coexist in my male body with no problem at all. I just reserve my female outer appearance for private moments at home only. I'm learning all of the time how to adapt to everyone's perception of my coexistense with them being half male and half female in appearence. Most people are really acceptant, as long as one has a jovial atttitude.

Ralph

Thanks again for the warmth and good advice, everyone.  I've been very interested in undergoing a past life regression but haven't had the time.  I think I'll make the time :).

I'm in the same situation as you, Ralphina, except my wife does not support my transitioning although she concurred with my therapist that hormones would be beneficial to me.  We also have children, so it's even more complicated as you well know.    In a sense I'm transitioning physically but with no roadmap in place regarding the endpoint of it all.    You're lucky that you have such an accepting wife.   My does try, and it's probably too much to ask of any person, so I have no ill will; this has been very very hard on her.  Just yearning w/o much outlet at this point.  I wish the things that made me happy didn't make her miserable, but that's the reality of it.    


Laffingrain, looking forward to reading your book!

Aeyna and Ralphina

i wish you happiness and love; the path you have chosen is not easy but your spirits are being made strong in this journey and it is in the name of love that you venture forth.

She ne'er lov'd who durst not venture all ... Dryden.

Keep well and know that there are people that understand.

My love
Caryn

Hi Aeyna,

just wanted to say hi, and glad to have you with us, and welcome!  Looking forward to corresponding with you on the board.  I think you will find it very interesting with the richness of the collective members.  Some very wonderful people here to meet!

:)

Steve

dear Aeyna you said: Just yearning w/o much outlet at this point.  I wish the things that made me happy didn't make her miserable, but that's the reality of it.    
____

I understand this statement well and my heart goes out to you. women's energy is a yearning type..she wishes to give her best away and have it received. so often this is not how reality is on the Earth. chin up though..there will be completion of that yearning. we just can't predict the exact date. what I wished to say about your wife; she on some level chose to journey with you for her own growth I'm sure, as I'm sure your relationship with her did not begin when you met, but perhaps long before you and she were born into flesh.  when a man and woman get together they are busy reflecting each other. her own self image is undergoing a severe belief system crash right now. the woman needs the man energy to be proud of herself that she is a woman, and vice versa. now she has to come to terms that balance is everything..within her she must find her balance on her own as her man is becoming what she is, a woman. she will be thinking of you as "girl friend." soon. or best friend. (better) so its hard.  for instance, my friend who's husband was growing breasts, which is a symbol of womanhood, told her that his breasts were bigger and better looking than hers????  how crass I thought. they did divorce. this competition you can avoid to understand your wife's is feeling perhaps she has failed you to bring forth your manhood, if that makes any sense to you, she may feel threatened with her own self image but not want to admit it to you. if the two of you can support each other regardless of gender issues you can stay together but its going to be tough from my viewpoint as both are expressing the same polarity.

when we transit to our true home, which is not this Earth, things look different, we can see we took on our gender expression and that all of us are free to express either gender qualities as we have both inside the free and loving spirit domain.
I love being a woman this life. I sense I was male in another and a somewhat onery male but I had a tender heart which saved me from hell. balance is the key, to become balanced in both expressions; there is so much freedom in that thought, that we can put aside our roles we've taken on and be fulfilled in those yearnings you speak of. hope this helped. and be gentle with each other  is my only message for all those lucky enough to have a relationship going on. :)


she never loved who durst not venture all...from Auggie by Dryden..oh, yea!
courage is the name of the game!

Laffingrain,

Thank you for that insight.    I was profoundly moved by it.   You put into words what we've been experiencing nonverbally for some time.  Yearning to love and express as women, but finding no "outlet" in the other.    So much love for each other too, so we find ourselves full of ineffable sadness.    

Love
Aeyna